To The Edge
by WritingIsHard
Summary: If failing to keep Lucifer locked in his cage wasn't bad enough, now we've got the apocalypse to contend with, horsemen, and god knows what else. Things could be worse though I imagine. Really, the actual devil traipsing about isn't the very worst thing that could happen, right? *Continuation to Heaven's a Lie*
1. Chapter 1

_**Well here we go. The continuation to Heaven's a Lie. For those that stumble across this that haven't read the first story, I would advise doing so or else nothing is going to make sense :)**_

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><p>That bright light just kept getting brighter and brighter, the screeching and hissing sound was enough to make my eardrums bust. And still, we stood there in that damn room like three bloody idiots. I don't know, perhaps it was just the thought of what was happening that had rendered us unable to move. Maybe it was because it seemed far too fantastic to actually be reality. Naturally when one sits and thinks about the actual devil coming up out of the ground, they would be quick to assume it was an awful nightmare.<p>

But, unfortunately for the lot of us and the entire world, it wasn't a nightmare. It was really happening. Lucifer was coming, and he was surely going to bring about nothing but destruction and pain with him.

Finally it seemed Dean had the sense to snap out of that horrible daze long enough to announce we needed to run. Seeing is that I had blasted the doors off their hinges a speedy get away shouldn't have been too difficult. But, I was always wrong, especially in dangerous situations.

The doors might have been blasted away, but it didn't matter because the ceiling began to crack and crumble before completely blocking the entrance, but we weren't offered the opportunity to panic before with another blast of white light my eyes opened and I found we were in an entirely different place.

I had no idea where, all I knew was that it was full of people and the seats were all jammed packed together.

"What the hell..." Dean murmured. "How'd we get on an airplane?"

A-Airplane? Oh good gods...

I forced my way over to look out the tiny little window and nearly wet myself at seeing the bright lights of a city thousands of feet below.

"I dunno," Sam answered, out of breath. "Angels maybe? Maybe it was Cas?"

That did sound like something Castiel would do; removing us from danger and then sending us on an airplane.

Normally I might have been a tad excited at my first airplane ride, but this... Wasn't anything exciting. It was horrifying because not long after we miraculously arrived on that airplane was there a burst of bright white light that shot up from the earth in a sky high pillar... Lucifer... We were flying directly over the location where his cage was opening. Which caused the craft to suddenly shift, alarms to start blaring, and oxygen masks to fall from their compartments.

Dean grabbed one and slammed it over my face, then did the same with his own and I couldn't help but sit there frozen in my seat thinking right about now would be a bloody good time to wake up from this nightmare!

Thankfully the aircraft didn't careen out of the sky in one huge fireball, and within the next thirty minutes we landed at the airport. Since Dean had left his vehicle at Bobby's we ended up renting another to make the drive back to Chuck's. Once we were back on the road, with nothing but silence and the long stretch of distance in front of us, the silence became more than deafening.

It was impossible to know what was going through Dean or Sam's minds right then, but both brothers were eerily quiet and the tension in the vehicle was not at all comforting.

During the long drive I prayed to Castiel over and over again, hoping he would respond and let me know if he and Gadreel were safe, but... I heard nothing. I tried not to worry over it, tried to tell myself that my father was no idiot and he knew how to take care of himself, but... Considering the situation and everything that had happened, I really didn't believe that he would let me worry like that. Which of course was making me sick to my stomach. If Castiel wasn't answering me... What did that mean?

After a deep breath I sat back and tried to calm myself. I would find out soon enough once we arrived at Chuck's home. I would see for myself that Castiel and Gadreel were both well and fine, and I was panicking for nothing.

And that drive just couldn't go by fast enough as far as I was concerned, it felt like an eternity before we finally pulled to a stop in front of his run down old house and bounded our way up the stairs.

For some odd reason the front door was hanging open, which of course was disconcerting. Dean and Sam both pushed their way in first, starting down the hallway with me close behind. As soon as we rounded the corner into his living room we all three came to a sudden stop.

The room was a total disaster area, looking as though a tornado tore through it. The furniture was turned over on its sides, papers were strewn about, broken glass and other things was everywhere...

I moved ahead of both Sam and Dean because my eyes also fixed on something else right along with the debris. Blood... A lot of blood. It was splattered everywhere. On the floors, on the walls, and even on the ceiling. As much as I didn't want to notice as well, was bits of hair and skin mixed along with it.

"Oh gods..." I muttered quietly.

"What the hell happened here?" Sam asked. "Where's Chuck?"

No sooner had he asked that question did Chuck suddenly appear from around the corner and whacked Sam straight in the head with a toilet plunger.

"Gah, ow!" Sam yelped, stumbling backwards.

"Oh shit." Chuck instantly dropped his makeshift weapon. "Sam, oh my god... You're alive. You're all alive."

"Looks like it." Dean replied. "So, uh... What the fuck happened here? Did that archangel make this mess?"

"Yeah," Chuck nodded. "It was awful... I really thought I was gonna get nuked or something, but... Somehow I managed to keep my ass safe."

Yes, seeing is that he was God and all...

"Where's Castiel?" I asked now, stepping forward. "Is he all right?"

I tried to ignore the look on his face after I asked that, or the way he fell silent.

"Alana, he's... He's dead." Chuck replied. "I'm sorry."

"W-What?" My heart fell to my stomach. "That's... That's impossible."

"You gotta be mistaken, man." Dean said, inching his way closer to me. "What happened?"

"The archangel... He was too much for him to handle, and... He... He just exploded."

After he said that all I saw was white... My vision faded, my ears started ringing and no matter how much I tried I couldn't seem to squeeze in a breath.

"Jesus..." Sam murmured.

I felt myself fall backwards before landing on the sofa, and just as soon as I got my vision back was it blurred again except now because I was trying my best not to sob.

Dean crouched down in front of my and took hold of both my hands.

"It's okay, Laney. Maybe Chuck's wrong, huh? Think about it. It's Cas, and he's not an idiot. He probably figured out a way to ditch outa here before anything happened to him."

Except that there was clearly the remnants of someone splattered all over the damn room, so that meant someone had indeed exploded in there.

Now I couldn't hold it back anymore and quietly sobbed into my hands while Dean moved to sit beside me. He pulled me close but didn't say anything, and I could feel Sam and Chuck's eyes burning into me.

I had always felt as though my life was cursed from the beginning. That I was always destined for unhappiness and pain, and this was just further confirmation of that in my opinion. It had taken me over three hundred years to finally know who my father was, and he ended up being someone that I genuinely cared for, and someone who cared for me and now... He was gone... He was gone and I didn't even get to tell him goodbye or anything else that I might have wanted to say.

How was this fair? Was it really being born nephilim that had cursed me from the moment I was born? Or was it something else that I wasn't aware of? Was the universe just trying to play cruel jokes on me for all eternity?

I felt Dean kiss the side of my head before letting out a deep sigh. "I'm sorry, Laney."

Yes, I suppose that just proved it all the more that Castiel was gone. Because if Dean could find no logical explanation for Castiel maybe by some _miracle _being alive, well... Then that was it...

My father was gone. I had him for such a short amount of time and now he was gone.

"What about..." I paused and swallowed back more tears. "What about Ezekiel? What happened to him?"

No, I couldn't stand anymore bad news but I needed to know, and... Going by the look on Chuck's face now just told me all over again that what I was about to hear was going to be devastating.

"He, uh... He thought that if he gave himself up then maybe the archangel wouldn't kill Cas. So, he let them take him, but... They killed Castiel anyways." He sighed and shook his head. "I'm sorry. I feel like a world class douche for having to tell you all of this."

Honestly I didn't know if I could take anymore... First Lucifer and now this? So, to spare myself having to hear anymore I stood from the sofa and brushed the tears away.

"Do you mind if I use your bathroom, Chuck?" I asked.

He nodded and motioned behind him. "Yeah, sure... It's the door under the stairs."

I quickly fled the sitting room and made my way for the bathroom, locking myself inside.

The first thing I did was turn on the faucet, then moved to the closed toilet and sat down, sobbing into my hands all over again. As far as I was concerned things couldn't get any worse. First Lucifer is let out, then my father dies... And then my best friend gave himself up, was returned to heavens prison most likely, and all for nothing. What was next, something happening to Dean and Sam?

I tried my best to calm down, to think about what was right in front of us now. The boys were going to need my help, we needed to get to work straight away if we stood any chance of stopping Lucifer. As much as I wanted to scream, cry and grieve for my lost father, I couldn't do that now...

So, as much as I still hurt, I pushed the tears away again and stood. After a few deep breaths I splashed my face with water, hardened my expression, and left the bathroom.

Once I stepped back into the hallway I felt myself freeze at hearing voices... Voices that weren't Dean, Sam or Chuck. As a matter of fact, it was a voice that chilled me right down to my very core, and for a very split second I actually considered running in the opposite direction just to avoid him.

It was Zachariah...

What in the world was he doing here?! Was it for me? Was it for Sam and Dean? Why?

As I inched my way closer to the sitting room, hoping to god that Zachariah couldn't hear me, I heard him spout some drivel about taking Dean with them. That it was time he start on his path, the righteous mans job was beginning.

Honestly I wasn't certain what Dean's job happened to be. I knew that this entire mess was supposed to fall on the mans shoulders who broke the first seal, which of course was Dean. But, how one lone man was supposed to solve all of this was still beyond me. As much faith as I had in Dean, there was still doubt lingering in the background when it came to an issue this massive. Strong hunter or not, this was the devil, and I just couldn't see one lone man taking him on all by himself and actually coming out the victor.

Castiel could have probably told us the answer to that...

No, I shook that thought away and focused on the words coming from the sitting room. I loved Castiel, and I know he would have made a wonderful father, but I couldn't allow myself to think about him now or else it would hinder my mind... And right now it needed to be as strong and sturdy as possible. I couldn't allow myself to falter at all or else it could cost Dean and Sam their lives. And... I just couldn't lose them too.

By now the conversation in the sitting room was getting heated, and I knew it was only a matter of time before Dean exploded and tried to make a move against Zachariah. And, since it was apparent Chuck was content with hiding his true identity and not getting involved, I knew he wouldn't intervene and stop it from happening... Sam couldn't do it either, he didn't have that power, which meant it was up to me. But... One girl against who knows how many angels wasn't going to be pretty. I couldn't do it by just running in there and swinging my angel blade. So... I decided to do the next best thing.

I pulled my angel blade from my jacket and cut a deep gash in my forearm, then proceeded to as quickly as possible, draw a banishing sigil on the wall outside the sitting room, just next to the archway. After that, I lowered my jacket sleeve and tried to cover the injury before emerging in the doorway and coming to a stop.

Instantly Zachariah spotted me, and just seeing that sneer on his face I wanted to immediately vomit.

"Well well, Alana, good to see you." He said, eying me up and down. "Looks like you've healed pretty well since our last encounter."

I noticed Dean's shoulders tense up. "You don't speak to her, you don't even _look _at her, you understand me? Or so help me god I'll cut your heart out."

But of course such threats had no affect on Zachariah and he just wouldn't lose that disgusting sneer. "That's noble and gallant of you and all, Dean, but we don't have the time for something like that. Like I said... Time's a wasting, and you need to come with us now."

"Why?" I said, finally finding my voice. "What in the world could you possibly need Dean for?"

"You're not completely stupid, Alana. You know that Dean's role in all of this is to stop Lucifer and prevent the apocalypse."

"Yes, that's lovely and all-" I replied with a scowl. "But something tells me that Dean's not so eager to do what you tell him to do. Maybe if you explain a little what his role is exactly..."

"That's not part of the deal," Zachariah's snark faded. "You think he has a choice in all of this? That he can say yay or nay on what's going to happen? No. He doesn't. He's going to do what heaven tells him, what _I _tell him to do without argument, or I'll drag his worthless behind from this house and-"

His words cut off when I slammed my hand down against the sigil and with a shriek and bright burst of light Zachariah and his goons with him vanished into oblivion.

After the craze and anxiety wore off from that Dean turned to face me with his eyes wide.

"Good idea, Laney." He said. "I sure as hell didn't have a way out of that shit."

"This sucks ass." Chuck snapped, frowning deeply.

"Look, uh," Sam blew out a deep breath of air and brushed his hair back. "I think we should get the hell out of here before those assholes come back."

I was in a daze after that, as Dean grabbed me by the hand and pulled me from Chuck's house. Not long after that we were on the road, zooming off towards another destination which I didn't bother to question about.

I kept myself slumped in the backseat, with my head pressed against the window watching the darkness fly by. Yet again, the silence in the car was more than uncomfortable, only now it wasn't caused solely from Lucifer, but the fact that my father was gone and Dean and Sam simply didn't know what to say.

Hours later, just as dawn was approaching we pulled over in some unknown town and found a motel. Under the circumstances Dean wouldn't allow me to have my own room this time, so moping and crying in solitude wasn't in the cards for me. And after a long shower that only made me feel worse, I emerged from the bathroom to find that Dean was the only one in the room.

"Where's Sam?" I asked.

"Went to grab some breakfast and coffee." He answered. "So, uh... You okay, Laney?"

I went stiff at my recently acquired duffel, forcing away the horrible gut wrenching sob that was trying its best to work its way out. After flipping my sopping wet hair over my shoulder, I nodded.

"I'm fine, Dean."

Sighing, he stood from the edge of the bed and moved his way to me. I went even more stiff after that, because I knew if he kept this up then it would be seconds before I was bawling my eyes out again.

"C'mon," He said. "You can talk to me, you know?"

"I know." I knelt down at my bag and made a disaster of my belongings. "But I don't want to talk about anything."

But he just wouldn't stop, and really... I appreciated that he cared this much about how I was feeling, but he just didn't seem to understand that I couldn't... I couldn't talk about Castiel... I couldn't sit there and say out loud how he was gone and I was never going to see him again. I just... I just wanted to shove it away, as far back in my mind as possible and pretend it didn't even happen. Because... Pretending I still didn't have a father was less painful than knowing I found him and loved him, and then he was taken away from me so soon.

"Okay," He nodded. "Well... If you change your mind, I'm here."

I only nodded at that, unable to stop him before he reached over and hugged me. And well... Resisting the urge to cry again was impossible after that, and I broke down and sobbed into his shoulder.

"I'm sorry." He said, stroking my back. "I know there's nothin' I can say right now that's gonna make you feel any better. Just... If you feel yourself slipping again, Laney. Please just talk to me okay?"

I suppose it was reasonable to assume that I would immediately want to attempt to take my own life again after this, but... I wouldn't do that. Yes I was devastated over everything that had happened and I didn't know if I would recover, but Castiel would never want me to do something like that because of him.

"Thank you, Dean." I pulled away and wiped my eyes. "But you don't need to worry. I'll be all right."

He didn't believe me, I could tell. And I knew that if I was going to get through all of this without him watching my every move, then I would need to learn how to act. Because we had a much greater issue at hand right now, which of course was stopping the devil and the apocalypse.

Thankfully though Sam returned a few moments later, so the conversation was quickly diverted back to Lucifer. I was silent however, picking around at my stack of pancakes Sam had brought me, barely listening to anything the boys were saying. I did however notice Sam mention that he had phoned Bobby and alerted him of our location, and he claimed he was going to drive the Impala here. Which was good I supposed, because at least Bobby would be able to help them in sorting out everything. Right at that given moment I wasn't much use to anyone and would have benefited them more by sitting in a corner with my face in the wall.

It was going to take a good ten hours for Bobby to get here, which meant we had that time to work ourselves. It didn't take me long to notice though that there was a certain tension in the air whenever Sam and Dean interacted. With Sam, I sensed unbelievable guilt and sorrow for his actions, with Dean it was... I hated to think that it was resentment and hostility, which he tried his best to mask and did a rather poor job of it. Sam as well could sense that his brother was pretending to be well and fine, while in reality he was ready to spit fire over what had happened. I knew that it was only a matter of time before Dean exploded and took his anger and aggression out on poor Sam's face.

No, Sam wasn't completely innocent in this. It was his poor decisions that had caused all of this, but... In a way it wasn't his fault, because Ruby had him completely fooled. She had him believing that he was the only one that could put a stop to all of this, and that killing Lilith was actually a good thing. Honestly, who would have imagined that offing a demon like that would actually be horrible? No one. And yes, Sam was hasty in his choices and made the wrong ones in the sense that he never should have went back to Ruby and drank demon blood again, but he did it with the intentions of fixing things... So, while I could understand Dean's anger and hostility, I could also sympathize with poor Sam, because had he known what his actions would cause... He never would have done it.

Still... That didn't ease the tension in the room, and I was thankful when a couple hours later there was a knock at the door. At least with whomever was on the other side of it, it would distract us for a moment from the awkwardness.

Sam moved closer and peered out the peephole, and he eased up slightly before pulling the door open.

I glanced over his shoulder to see a woman, one that seemed completely startled as she glanced upwards at Sam. Her eyes widened, her breath quickened, and I was convinced the poor girl would faint.

"Uh," Sam said. "You okay, lady?"

"Oh my god." She blurted out, the stunned and mesmerized look in her eyes intensifying. "Sam... Is that really you?"

Sam glanced back to Dean and I with his forehead crinkled.

"Do I know you?" He replied.

"No... Not yet anyways, but I know you. I know you're Sam Winchester, and... And that's-" She moved her eyes past Sam and glared at a very discombobulated Dean. "You're... Uh, well that's not important."

I frowned at that.

"Okay, who the hell are you and why are you here?" Dean barked back.

This crazy girl moved her attention to me now, eying me up and down. "So... You're the nephilim Chuck told me about? Wow... I didn't expect you to be so... Pretty. But that's okay, I'm not threatened, I know I've got redeeming qualities."

"What?" I glanced to Dean. "What in the world is she talking about?"

"Beats the hell outa me. You sure she's not a demon?"

"Unfortunately not, so you can't stab her."

"My name's Becky," She said, scowling at us. "And I'm here to give you a message from Chuck since he can't give it to you himself." She moved to the center of the room. "He said the angels are watching him, which I have to say is a nice change to the mythology by the way. I was getting a little tired of reading about demons constantly."

"Wait, a message?" Sam perked up. "What is it?"

"He said that the Michael sword's on earth, and you can find it in a castle, on a hill made of forty two dogs." It was hard to miss how her eyes went twirly after that.

"On a hill of forty two dogs?" Sam questioned. "That doesn't make any sense, are you sure that's the exact message?"

"I know it's confusing and doesn't make sense, but that's what he said." She inched her way closer to Sam and I heard Dean snort in amusement when she laid her hands on his chest. "I memorized every word, Sam. For you. I did it all for you."

I cocked my head to the side, watching their strange interactions. "Um, Dean. Shouldn't we..."

"No," He interrupted, trying his best not to laugh. "No we really shouldn't."

"But he's clearly uncomfortable and-"

"Just let me have this, Laney." He snickered. "Please?"

How Sam being so uncomfortable and awkward was entertaining I had no idea, but I didn't make a fuss and instead kept my mouth shut because at least Dean didn't seem to want to smash his brothers face in anymore. At least for the moment.

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><p>After Becky had delivered the message from Chuck, Sam and Dean were given a boost of motivation to start their search for the Michael sword. Naturally that involved somehow deciphering the the odd message, because it was safe to assume that a castle couldn't exist on a hill of forty two dogs.<p>

I had a feeling this was going to take quite a long while.

But, if there actually was a Michael sword, and it had the capability of slaughtering the devil then at least we had a way out of this nonsense. A way out that quite possibly might keep us all from being killed. Yes there was still the issue of getting close enough to Lucifer to use the blade on, but that was something we would figure out later. First and foremost was locating the sword, and then we would discuss the details.

When Bobby finally arrived it didn't take me long to notice that something didn't feel quite... Right. It was hard to explain, and really the chances were good that I was sleep deprived and only imagining things, but... Bobby didn't feel much like Bobby right then. Yes, he was acting the same as always, and he didn't hesitate to give both Sam and Dean a hug once he saw them, but still... Something didn't feel right. But once they got to work I finally had to conclude that it was my imagination and tried my best to force whatever feelings I was having away. Besides, if there really was something wrong with Bobby then I should have been able to determine what it might have been. It's not as though he was possessed, because I would have been able to see the demons face beneath his, and... There was nothing else wrong.

But my doubts were only confirmed all the more once Sam confessed the truth to Bobby. That he was responsible for Lucifer being released, that it was his decisions and killing Lilith that brought all of that on. Bobby's reaction was... Awful. Granted I didn't know the man as well as Dean or Sam, but the one thing I consistently noticed was that he loved the boys like they were his own. Which was why it was all the more alarming that Bobby basically disowned Sam after he confessed the truth. To me that just proved there was something seriously wrong with Bobby, and even Dean had given him an odd little glare afterwards.

Sam though... The poor thing... He looked completely crushed, and I could tell he was trying his best not to cry in front of everyone.

"Once all this bullshit's over and done with," Bobby concluded. "I want you to lose my number."

I didn't know what to say or do. And I fully expected for Dean to come to his brothers defense somehow, but instead he only stood there stone silent and blank faced. Maybe in a way it was his way of punishing Sam as well, because like I stated before I could sense just how disgusted and angry he was with his brother. Can't say that I was very proud of Dean right then.

"I, uh-" Sam cleared his throat. "Maybe I'll just go to the library or something, see if there's anything on the Michael sword documented there."

"Yeah," Bobby replied gruffly. "Maybe you should do that."

Sam grabbed his jacket and couldn't seem to get out of that room fast enough, and before I could stop myself I was following right after him.

"I'll go with you." I said, not giving him the chance to argue before I slipped into the hall and led the way down the stairs.

Surprising enough he didn't argue once we got to the car, and he didn't speak one word on the drive to the library. When we pulled to a stop in the parking lot, he hesitated getting out and only sat there staring down at the steering wheel.

"You know, I don't get it." He said now. "Why don't you hate me too, Laney?"

I arched a brow. "Excuse me?"

"I know I fucked up. I fucked up in a way that I can never ever fix it, I get that. And... I know I deserved everything Bobby just said to me, and I can tell that it's only a matter of time before Dean says something similar. I deserve it, I know... I just don't understand how you don't hate me too."

Sighing, I turned to face him. "Sam, why in the world would I hate you?"

"Why _wouldn't _you hate me?" He replied. "After what I did it's what I deserve. I mean, I was horrible and what I did to you... Hitting you like I did, that was more than fucked up."

"You made a mistake, Sam. We all make mistakes."

"But that's different, you were trying to help me. And, then after I did that I ran off with Ruby and fucked up even more and now look what's happened? I let Lucifer out... I brought on the apocalypse. How the hell does someone snap back from something like that? I can't. I don't know how I'm supposed to make this right, Laney. And, if I can't find _someway _of fixing what I fucked up, then the entire world is gonna suffer for it. All of that's on me." He sat back and swallowed hard. "So, it's not only Bobby that should hate me now. You should too, and so should Dean."

He fell silent again as I struggled to form some sort of response that wouldn't make matters worse.

"Well," I returned my attention to the parking lot. "Like I said, everyone makes mistakes. And yes, sometimes those mistakes are horrible and what you might consider unforgivable. But, I don't hate you, Dean doesn't hate you, and I know deep down that Bobby doesn't either. He was just angry. And, after everyone's cooled down and we've figured out a way out of this mess, you're going to realize that's true. Right now you're content with condemning yourself, which you shouldn't do."

"Yeah, right," He snorted. "After what I did I think I should be condemned."

"And you're wrong about that. The fact of the matter is, is that you thought you were doing the right thing. You thought you were stopping all of this from happening. Yes, you were wrong, it was a mistake, but it's not as though you did it intentionally. And like I said, once everyone's cooled down, Dean and Bobby are going to realize that too."

He tapped his hands on the steering wheel before pushing the door open. "I appreciate what you're trying to do, Laney. I really do, but... You don't know them like I do." He started to climb out of the car now. "There's no coming back from what I did."

He started across the parking lot now and I could only sit there smothered in a cloud of angst and sadness.

Well, we were off to a lovely start so far, now weren't we?


	2. Chapter 2

_**If I recall correctly, I think someone asked me what I pictured Laney to look like? Well, I pictured her to look like Kristina Romanova. Not sure if I spelled her name right, but she's a Russian model and super gorgeous. Totally have a girl crush on her lol.**_

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><p>He was ignoring me... I could tell. Sam was trying to pretend I wasn't sitting there at that library table. That I wasn't watching his every move and hoping and praying that he was going to be all right. Instead, he kept himself completely immersed in a stack of books, books that he was hoping would lead to some sort of information on the Michael sword. But, I knew already that there would be nothing here. If the angels and heaven didn't know where the Michael sword was, then how in the world would humanity? But, he just kept on reading. Turning page after page, keeping his forehead creased and lips cinched tightly, acting as though he had no idea I was even there.<p>

I knew very well what he was doing. He was trying his best to stall. He didn't want to return to the motel, to his brother and Bobby, and see that look in their eyes again. Most likely he was trying to conjure up some way of somehow fixing things, to set things right. Either that or he was just too ashamed to return.

Still I felt horrible for the man, I wished there was something I could do to make him feel better. But, I wasn't much help to anyone. When I myself was an emotional basket case, how in the world could I ever hope to comfort someone else? I was barely holding myself together, barely able to sit there and contain myself without bursting into tears at the thought of my father being gone. The one thing I wanted to do was curl up in a ball in sob, but I couldn't do that. There wasn't time for that now.

"So, have you found anything?" I asked, and Sam flinched at hearing me speak.

"No, not yet." He replied, turning the pages to the point they practically tore from the book all together.

"We've been here for nearly an hour... Don't you think we should return to the motel by now, Sam?"

"No." He shook his head, then grabbed another book from his stack. "There has to be something here."

"You know very well that there isn't. If you're hoping to find something on the Michael sword then you need to return to your brother and work together."

That made his actions freeze, and he suddenly slammed the book closed. "They, uh... Yeah I don't think they want me there right now, Laney."

"That's ridiculous. Of course they do."

"You heard what Bobby said, you really gonna sit there and say that he wants me around?"

I sighed, and told myself over and over again that the sole purpose of my remaining with them was because I wanted to help them. And, considering the situation I couldn't very well get frustrated with him.

"He didn't mean what he said, Sam-" I replied. "I know he didn't. He's going to regret it after a while. He'll realize he was just angry."

How many times was I going to have to try and convince him of that? Or, maybe I was just trying to convince myself it was true as well. Because... Because I couldn't deny that Dean was looking at Sam differently. I had sensed the hostility and disappointment, and Bobby... Well he felt entirely different from the moment he stepped into that motel room. So, maybe that meant in a way I _myself _didn't believe that Dean or Bobby would ever forgive Sam for what he did. I only hadn't the heart to tell Sam that. Being brutally honest, at least when it would hurt someone so greatly, just wasn't who I was.

So, I only sat there silent. Silent and still and just... Unable to function properly with my mind so bent out of shape. I didn't even notice that my phone was ringing in my pocket until Sam nudged me.

"Laney... You're ringing." He said.

"Oh." I broke of my trance and yanked the phone from my pocket, noticing it was Dean so I quickly answered. "Hello, Dean."

"You still at the library?" He replied without a hello of his own.

"Yes, Sam's still researching. Why? Is there an issue?"

He snorted. "Yeah, there's a shit ton of issues right now. But, right at this very second it's okay. I think I might've stumbled onto something, so you two get your asses back to the motel."

He hung up after that without so much as another word spoken, so I dropped the phone back in my pocket and stood.

"We need to head back. Dean says he's found something." I finished.

Of course Sam didn't want to leave, but he had no choice now. So, he pushed his books aside and left them on the table and followed me from the library.

The drive back was fast, and Sam led the way from the parking lot and up the side stairs to the second floor. Halfway down the hallway I felt my steps falter as a strange sensation overtook me. There wasn't a chance at explaining what it was, and it didn't matter either because no sooner had I felt it did I hear a crash and screaming coming from our room at the end of the hall.

We rushed to the door after that and Sam bounded inside just in time to be whacked right in the head with a telephone. He fell backwards after that, but regained his footing relatively easily and then started pummeling some man I had never seen before.

The scene inside the room was ghastly. There were three men and one woman, Bobby was laying on the floor with the demon blade sticking out of his stomach and Dean was struggling to fight off a large burly bald man. Who these people were, I had no damn idea, but didn't stand around to try and figure it out and instead darted for Dean and grabbed the man from behind.

Dean pulled the blade from Bobby and stabbed him with it now, and only when I saw the way beneath his skin flickered and popped, a horrible awful face becoming visible for only a moment before the man fell dead... Did I realize that this entire bloody room was full of demons!

After that the female panicked, and instead of lingering behind to fight any longer opted for smoking out of her human body and bursting through the window. Sam and Dean took down the remaining men in seconds and then everything fell silent.

"Bobby!" Dean shrieked then fell down beside. "Oh shit. Oh shit."

"We gotta get him to a hospital," Sam said now, moving to help pick Bobby from the floor. "Hurry, he's not gonna make it."

I could say nothing and instead followed the boys from the room quickly as we took the back set of stairs to avoid anyone and climbed in the Impala. Dean drove while Sam sat in the back with Bobby, and I clung to the seat for dear life as the car flew around sharp turns and down side streets.

"They were... They were all demons?" I questioned, halfway to myself because my voice was so quiet I didn't figure Dean would have heard it.

"Yeah, there was one in Bobby too, Laney. What the hell, huh? I thought you could see demons real faces? How'd you not know there was a demon in Bobby that whole damn time?" He replied.

My brows furrowed at that. That was a very excellent question because I should have been able to see those demons, and I should have been able to see that Bobby was possessed as well. But... I couldn't...

"I... I have no idea, Dean. I can't explain it. Maybe the demons knew about me and took measures to ensure I couldn't see them?"

Maybe that explained why I sensed something odd about Bobby when he arrived? Maybe that explained why he was so harsh and cold and... Not at all himself when she said those awful things to Sam?

"How's he doin' back there, Sam?" Dean asked now.

"He's losing a lot of blood, Dean. Step on it!" Sam answered.

We all fell silent as Dean sped up even more, and a few moments later we pulled into the emergency drive of the hospital. Seconds after that Sam and Dean had practically carried Bobby through the front doors as he was whisked away by the medical staff and disappeared through a set of double doors.

"We gotta go." Dean then stated. "The demons heard where the Michael sword is, so we gotta get there fast."

Sam hesitated following his brother out of the hospital. "We can't just leave him here alone, Dean. What if-"

"I'll stay with him." I interrupted. "Don't worry, I'll stay here, just go."

They both rushed out of the hospital after that without another word spoken, and I moved over to the waiting area and took an uncomfortable seat.

No I certainly didn't want to wait here alone, especially now that I knew there was something wrong with me to the point that I couldn't even see a demon coming any longer. If that was the case, would I have been able to see an angels true face anymore either?

Since I wasn't certain how far Dean and Sam were going to have to go, I settled in for what could be hours alone in this hospital. And I _was_ alone in the waiting room mostly, but for one or two individuals that came and went after the first hour.

I didn't expect for Dean to call me and let me know they were all right out there. With something as serious as the Michael sword it was safe to assume that they were going to have their hands full out there. Which of course wasn't at all comforting. And I found that I couldn't stop fidgeting anxiously in my seat, wondering what was happening with them out there, if they would be safe or even if they would return at all. It was frightening to think that the angels very well might have gotten the jump on them. And... There I was... Sitting in the hospital waiting room unable to help them.

"Please, please please." I whispered quietly to myself. "Please don't let anything happen to them, please."

I also hoped and prayed that Bobby survived this attack, because if Dean and Sam returned to find the man they loved like a father had passed, well... They just wouldn't be able to handle that.

As it turns out, because of Bobby's injury the medical staff there had phoned the authorities, and since I was the only one there to speak with them it was up to me to make up some sort of story. Somehow I managed it without making a complete fool of myself, and without getting myself arrested either.

"I'm sorry," I said, rubbing my head. "But I don't know the exact details of the accident. I was at the library and when I returned I heard a scuffle. We found Bobby injured so we rushed him here to the hospital."

Whether they believed me or not, I couldn't tell simply because my mind wasn't even there right at the moment. It was... Who the hell knows where, all I knew was that I couldn't concentrate no matter how greatly I attempted it.

I barely heard anything else the police officers said, although I did recall hearing one state that I wasn't to leave the area because as soon as my friends returned, they wanted to speak with them as well. So, long after they were gone I found myself pacing across the waiting room, then taking another uncomfortable seat and fidgeting anxiously once again. It had been nearly three hours since Bobby was taken away, since Dean and Sam disappeared, and I hadn't heard a peep from anyone.

Somehow by a miracle I managed to calm down enough to halfway fall into an uneasy sleep on the sofa, until I felt someone nudge me by the shoulder.

"Excuse me," A woman in a white coat said. "Miss?"

I jolted awake with a start, immediately flying to my feet. "Yes, what is it? Is it Bobby?"

"Your friend's alive," She answered with a nod. "But there were some complications with the injury."

"Complications?" I replied.

"Yes, I'm sorry to have to tell you this, but there was some internal damage, severe internal damage and the result of that is he's now paralyzed from the waist down."

My face fell blank. "P-Paralyzed?"

"Yes, I'm so sorry."

For a moment I had half a notion to curse this woman up and down, because she certainly couldn't have been telling me the truth. Bobby wasn't paralyzed, he couldn't be. Other than Dean and Sam he was the strongest man I knew.

But why would she joke about something like that? What would be the point in it? She was a physician, a medical professional, and they certainly didn't gain their reputations by making up stories like that. So... I swallowed back a knot in my throat, feeling my legs give out from under me as I sat on the edge of the sofa.

"But he'll live?" I asked now. "He's going to live?"

"Yes," She nodded. "We're confident he's going to survive."

Then that's all that mattered right then. Just as long as Bobby was alive and he was going to survive this horrible injury then we could worry about his legs later. Perhaps we could find a sympathetic angel to heal him, or... We could conjure up something that could fix this problem. All that mattered was that he wasn't going to die, Dean and Sam weren't going to lose their father figure.

"Can I see him?" I peered up at the doctor with tears in my eyes.

"Are you related to the patient?"

"No, I'm just a friend."

"Then no, I'm sorry. We're only allowing immediate family back there right now. Tomorrow once he's moved out of ICU then you can visit with him."

I scowled bitterly at her as she left the waiting room. And when I was left in silence and solitude yet again, I rested my head in my hands and heaved out a few deep breaths.

At least Bobby survived... At least I wouldn't have to tell the boys that he was gone when they returned.

Gods, I wanted so desperately to phone Dean and tell him now. So at least he would have one less thing to worry about right then, but... I couldn't. I needed to wait for them to return, I couldn't take the risk of disturbing them when they could be in a dangerous situation.

With a quick glance to the clock I knew I was in for a long night, so I left the waiting room and roamed the hallways until finding a vending machine that served not only coffee but tea as well. And after getting a tea and a snack from a second machine, I dragged my feet as I moved my way back to the waiting room. Thankfully it was still empty, so I didn't have to worry about awkward glances or attempted small talk with strangers.

By the time midnight came and passed I had started to drift off to sleep a second time, shivering from the frigid atmosphere of this awful place. I was so exhausted not only mentally but physically that I could barely tell left from right. And trying to stay awake was just impossible even though I knew it was dangerous to close my eyes. There was no way of knowing when another demon might appear, or perhaps Zachariah or another angel that wanted to harm us.

After succumbing to sleeps taunts, I propped my head on the arm of the sofa and shivered from the cold. Half asleep, half awake, I couldn't process what was happening when I felt something warm cover me. Someone was covering me with a blanket, or... Or something. It was only when I realized that I was supposed to be alone in this hospital did my eyes finally start to open and a fuzzy figure kneeling down in front of me began to emerge.

Sitting up quickly, I blinked several times over and felt my heart lodge in my throat.

It was Castiel...

But, that was impossible... He couldn't be there in front of me right then... He was dead. The archangel killed him and... He was gone.

I was convinced I was dreaming, it was the only logical explanation because my father, he... He was dead.

"Are you all right?" He asked, which made me flinch.

"How..." I faintly murmured. "You... You were..."

"I know." He nodded, his eyes soft. "But... I'm not now. I'm fine now."

Before I could stop myself I choked back a sob, then lunged at him and squeezed him so tightly he never would have been able to move.

"I thought I would never see you again." I blabbered out between sobs.

He squeezed me back just as tightly. "I know. I'm so sorry, Alana. I'm sorry I couldn't come to you sooner."

"What happened?" I asked. "Chuck said that you died, that the archangel blew you up."

"He did," Castiel pulled away now, letting out a sigh as he kept his eyes on mine. "But... I was brought back."

"Brought back? By whom?"

"God, I'm assuming. He's the only one with the power to accomplish something like that, so..."

God... I lightly gasped at that. Chuck had seen my reaction to my father dying, had been the one to tell me what happened. Was that why he resurrected Castiel? Or, were there other motives?

"I don't even care how," I said now, squeezing him again. "Just as long as you're back." When I pulled away a second time I quickly wiped my eyes. "Goodness, I need to call Dean and Sam and tell them that-"

"I've already seen them, Alana. You see, the reason why I couldn't come to you sooner was because I didn't know where you were. With the markings I put on all of you I couldn't detect you, and I couldn't take the risk of calling you either. Not until... Not until Chuck's message to Sam and Dean was translated."

I shook my head. "What do you mean?"

He moved to sit down beside me and I instantly grabbed his hand. "Before I was cut off from heaven I heard the message the angels sent out of the location of the Michael sword. So, I bided my time until I knew Sam and Dean would have deciphered the message, I watched Zachariah and the others and once they were on the move I knew they were heading to that location as well. When I arrived, Zachariah was already there and he was trying to persuade Dean into coming with him again." His jaw clenched. "If I hadn't of appeared when I did and killed Zachariah's men, then Sam and Dean would probably be dead."

"Oh gods," I sat up straight. "They're all right now though?"

"Yes, they're fine. After Zachariah saw me I think it scared him into cooperating. Since God brought me back he didn't want to take the risk of angering him, so he healed the boys and disappeared."

"What of the Michael sword? Was it at the location?"

His eyes moved from mine now, focusing on his knees. "So to speak. The sword, it's not an actual blade. It's a vessel. To be more specific, Michael's vessel." When he returned his attention to me I didn't like the gleam in his eyes. "Dean is Michael's vessel, Alana."

For a moment I wondered if I had heard him correctly... Because, that was definitely the last thing I was ever expecting to hear. Dean... As a vessel? Not only that but Michael's vessel? That... That was the most ridiculous thing I had ever heard! That couldn't be right, Dean couldn't be a vessel, he couldn't be!

"You don't have to worry, Alana-" Castiel interrupted my thoughts. "Dean's never going to say yes."

"I should hope not." I spat out bitterly. "Because that would be a monumental mistake on his part."

"He knows that, and he would never in a million years agree to it. Michael's never getting his hands on Dean."

I nodded, forcing away the anxiety and pure hot rage that had gathered in the pit of my stomach.

"Good that's good then." I blew out a deep breath.

"How's Bobby?" He asked now. "They told me that he was possessed and had been stabbed."

"He's alive," I replied. "But not doing so well, Castiel. Because of the injury he's paralyzed now, from the waist down. He's not going to walk again." I suddenly perked up. "But, you could just heal him and-"

"No," He shook his head. "No I can't, Alana. I'm sorry. I've been cut off from heaven, there's some things I'm still able to do, some I can't. Healing just so happens to be one of the things I can no longer do."

Now that he brought that to my attention, and I had calmed down from the excitement from everything... I realized that just as the demons in the motel room, I couldn't see his true face any longer. All I could see was his vessel... Nothing else. No bright glow, no wings, nothing.

"Is that why I can't see your face now?" I asked.

He nodded. "When I was cut off, naturally you were as well since you're my child and it's my grace that helped create you."

"So, what does that mean exactly? What does that make me? Am I still considered nephilim?"

"For the moment, yes. But the longer we're cut off from heaven the more our powers and grace will dwindle away. Unless we can resolve that somehow, one day it will have faded completely."

I tried not to show him how excited I actually was about that. To be human was the only thing I ever wanted, but I knew that for Castiel it probably wasn't something that he dreamt of. He was an angel, that's all he ever had been or ever wanted to be. So no doubts his life changing so drastically would be devastating.

"Because of this, Alana, you need to make certain that you're even more careful out there from now on. Since you're not going to be able to see a demon or an angel coming now, you have to be on guard."

"I know. I realize that now. It's so horrible, because Bobby had been possessed from the moment he stepped into the motel earlier and I had no idea. If I had known, if I had said something, then maybe this wouldn't have happened to him."

He put his arm around me and pulled me close until I was resting my head on his shoulder.

"What happened to Bobby wasn't your fault. It was an unfortunate accident. You can't blame yourself." He replied.

Maybe I shouldn't, but I couldn't help but do so. And I couldn't help but wonder if Sam and Dean would blame me for it as well.

But, for the moment I shook that thought away, because I couldn't help but be so incredibly thankful and relieved that Castiel was alive. I suddenly felt like a little girl that was so excited and ecstatic to see her Papa that she didn't want to let him go ever again.

"Sam and Dean are making the drive back for the hospital now," Castiel said. "It should be an hour or two before they arrive, so... Why don't you get some more sleep, Alana?"

"Hm," I mumbled, almost asleep again already with my head on his shoulder. "I need to call Dean and tell him about Bobby."

"I'll do it." He patted my back. "Just get some sleep. After everything that's happened, you need it."

I wanted to argue but couldn't, and instead wrapped my arms around him tightly so he couldn't disappear on me again... Then fell asleep.

* * *

><p>The boys arrived at the hospital a few hours later, and after I explained the situation with the doctors not allowing us inside, Dean went on a tantrum and finally got us access to Bobby's room. And well, Bobby was awake by that time and throwing just as big a tantrum at his physician once we stepped outside his room door.<p>

As Castiel and I hit the doorway the doctor stormed out, looking as though he couldn't wait to leave Bobby's presence and the things he was throwing at him.

Considering the situation Castiel and I remained in the hallway while Dean and Sam visited with Bobby. And, undoubtedly Dean was explaining to Bobby what Castiel had explained to me the night before... That he wasn't able to heal any longer... That unfortunately, there was nothing he or I could do about what had happened to him. As much as I hated it, as horrible as I felt not only for Bobby, but Dean and Sam as well... Bobby was going to remain paralyzed.

"What do you think we'll do now, Castiel?" I asked.

He sighed at that before shifting to face me. "There's very little we can do right now. Avoiding Lucifer of course would be a start."

"But there has to be some way we can stop him? Isn't there?"

Before he could answer Bobby's door flew open and Dean motioned us inside.

"Get on in here you two, no need to be standing in the hall." He said.

I stepped inside first with Castiel behind me, and I noticed right off that Bobby was no longer in bed but sitting in a wheelchair by the window.

"So we were just talking," Sam said, and despite what happened to Bobby he seemed to be in better spirits. "And, we're just trying to figure out what we're gonna do next."

"That's what I was just explaining to Alana in the hall-" Castiel replied. "Unfortunately we don't have an actual Michael sword to rely on now. We know the truth, that it's Dean who's meant to be the vessel which naturally isn't going to happen-"

"No shit." Dean interrupted.

"Anyhow," Castiel went on. "I realized that our only option now is to find the only one in existence that would have the power to take on Lucifer head first. The one who resurrected me... God."

Dean's brows raised at that, as he stifled back a snicker. "Oh yeah, totally. Cause that's just so easy to do, man. Grab the phone book, I'm sure he's in the white pages."

"Dean," Sam sighed. "Just let him talk, okay?"

Castiel was clearly unamused by Dean's joking. "There is a way of tracking him down. It's an amulet, very special and rare that burns hot in God's presence."

"An amulet?" Bobby questioned. "Don't think I got somethin' like that on me."

"You don't, no. But Dean does."

Dean shifted on his feet. "What, me? I don't have an amulet?"

Castiel moved forward and reached down, grabbing the strange little necklace that Dean always wore and holding it up.

"This?" Dean said now. "You serious?"

"May I borrow it?" Castiel replied.

I cocked my head to the side and examined the little pendant closely. Really, I hadn't paid much attention to it in the past. It was a permanent part of Dean's ensemble and I couldn't recall ever seeing him take it off. Even when he was forced to adorn a suit for a job, he would wear the pendant beneath his clothing. But, incidentally I knew already that this amulet wouldn't at all glow in God's presence. Because Dean had been inches from Chuck and there wasn't so much as a spark coming from it. Which meant... Chuck had the ability to hide even from a powerful instrument like that.

"Uh, no-" Dean took a step back and jerked the pendant from Castiel's hand. "You can't."

"Dean, don't be stubborn," Castiel groaned. "It's not as though I'm going to destroy it or have no intention of giving it back. This is for an important cause. You want to stop Lucifer, you want to stop this war before it starts, then give me the damn amulet and let me find God, because he's the only one that can help us."

My eyes lowered to the floor, and it would have been so simple for me to tell them that God knew very well what was happening. We had been in his damned house not long ago as a matter of fact. Chuck knew that Lucifer was released, he knew what was going to become of the world if he wasn't stopped... I just wasn't certain he truly gave a damn about it.

But I couldn't say anything, I couldn't tell them that I knew Chuck was God... I had to hold that to myself and watch as my father disappeared on an endless wild goose chase that was all for bloody nothing.

"Okay fine." Dean relented, pulling the necklace off. "But don't lose it!"

"I won't. Thank you." Castiel sighed, then turned back to face me. "I have to go now, but I'll return when I can, and... Stay with Sam and Dean, Alana. And if you get into any trouble, call me immediately."

I nodded. "I will. Be careful out there."

Before he left I gave him a kiss on the cheek and another tight hug which he returned instantly. Seconds after that he disappeared from the room.

"Hey, Laney-" Dean said after Castiel was gone. "Why don't we take a trip to the cafeteria and grab some breakfast?"

"All right. Sam? Are you coming?"

Sam shook his head, passing his brother some sort of odd little glance that I couldn't read.

"No thanks," He said, giving a small smile. "Not hungry."

Dean led the way into the hall and once we were clear of Bobby's room he let out a deep breath.

"Crazy night, huh?" He asked.

"More than crazy." I replied. "Most of it was horrible."

"Least one good thing came out of it though, right? You got your old man back."

I smiled at that. "I know. When I saw him I... I was convinced I was dreaming. Words can't begin to describe how relieved I was."

"Yeah... I knew you were goin' through a pretty rough time thinking he was gone. Ya know, when he showed up and saved mine and Sammy's asses the first thing that went through my mind was, thank god Laney's gonna be so happy."

I snickered and latched onto his hand as we stopped in front of the elevators. "Weren't you happy to see him too?"

"Sure I was. He's an okay guy."

He was joking with me, I knew he was. He definitely thought more of Castiel than just him being an "okay guy".

When we stepped into the elevator and started down to the basement level where the cafeteria was located, I gave a quick glance down to Dean's hand that I still held.

"Did... What all did Castiel explain to you exactly with what happens with him being cut off from heaven?" I asked.

He flicked his eyes to me slightly before shrugging. "Just that his powers are limited or whatever. That he can't heal Bobby because of it, things like that. Why?"

"So... He didn't happen to mention that with him being cut off, I was cut off as well?"

The doors dinged open after that and he hesitated stepping off, not until they started to close again and he forced us both out.

"Uh, no he didn't mention you. Why? What's that mean, Laney?" He replied.

"It was why I didn't know Bobby had been possessed, why I couldn't see the demons true face. Since Castiel's my father and was cut off, I was cut off right along with him which means whatever abilities I had are fading. I can't see demons any longer, I can't see angels."

"Damn." Dean ran his hand down his face. "Okay, well... That don't matter. Cause me and Sammy could never see their faces either and we're still kickin'."

My eyes fell to the floor. "That seemed to be the only thing I could do to assist you both anymore. Since I had sworn off using my abilities any other way."

"You think that matters to me?" He tugged on my hand. "Just because you can't see demons or angels anymore doesn't suddenly make you useless, Laney. Besides... You helping us out isn't the reason why I want you sticking around, ya know?"

He kissed my forehead once over, before moving down to my lips. Just as always my mind was practically wiped clean of all traces of thought because of that. When he pulled away he passed me a wink before pulling me down the hallway again.

When we reached the cafeteria there was a long line of people waiting to be served breakfast, so we moved to the end and waited.

"Dean... Can I ask you a question?" I said.

"You just did."

My eyes rolled. "How are things going with Sam and yourself now? Are they any better at all?"

"Things were okay before, Laney." He replied quickly, and I could see his shoulders tense up.

"They were far from okay. You don't realize it but I can see the disdain you're feeling. It shows in your eyes, Dean. Sam sees it as well, and... I know he's hurting because of it."

His entire body tensed up now as he gave a halfhearted shrug. "I don't know what you want me to say."

"I want you to tell me whether or not you're ever going to be able to look past what he did," I retorted. "I want you to tell me if you're going to forgive your brother because he's afraid he's going to lose you. He was already convinced he'd lost Bobby after what he said to him, but... Now I know it was most likely the demon that said those harsh things to him. But. You... You're his brother and he loves you dearly."

"I haven't said anything to him, Laney-" He grumbled. "I've kept quiet ever since all that shit went down."

I nodded. "Yes, I realize that. And I think that might be one of the problems. He knows you're angry with him, he knows you're disappointed and yet you haven't said anything to him about what he did."

The line moved a few feet forward and Dean and I lingered behind without moving closer.

"And you know why I haven't said anything?" He said, turning to face me. "Because if I do I know I'll end up sayin' something I'll regret. I'll tell it like it is, I won't sugarcoat it, and the only thing that'll end up doing is fucking things up even more. If I say what's on my mind then Sam will probably take off, and right now that can't happen. He's weak, and there's no telling what he might do out there on his own now. Not only that, but we're gonna need all the help we can get at stopping Lucifer, if it's even possible at all. So... We gotta stick together."

Now he moved up to the end of the line again and I stomped after him.

"So, that's all there is anymore? Just the two of you working together? You're not going to talk to him? You're not going to resolve anything? You're just going to continue to punish him for his mistakes?"

His jaw tightened and I could tell he was trying his best to not lose his temper with me.

"What the fuck am I supposed to do, Laney? He chose a demon over me. He had the choice to do the right thing, to stop the crap he was doing and he didn't do it. He ran off with Ruby again, after hurting you and beating the shit outa me."

"If I recall," I replied with a frown. "You both seemed to beat the shit out of each other."

"Whatever, not the point. The point is is that I don't think I can trust him anymore. It sucks I gotta say that, but it's true. We'll work together because we have to, but... For right now that's as far as it's gonna go." He sighed after that and put his arm around me once he noticed my expression. "Look, I get what you're doing, Laney. I know you're just trying to help us, but... This ain't the first time Sam's pulled crap like this. Well, it's the first time he's chose a demon over me, but... This is just the way it always goes with us. So, don't worry about it."

That didn't make me feel any better. Because if Sam and Dean were at odds, if they weren't going to resolve their differences and forgive each other for the wrongs they _both _committed... This wasn't going to work. They would never be able to work together like they had in the past, which meant everything out in the world was going to get even worse.

So, I decided once and for all that I wasn't going to listen to Dean. I was still going to try and get them to work things out. I had to. I cared about them both far too much to watch their relationship crumble.


	3. Chapter 3

_**Thanks to everyone who's following and reviewing. I hope you're enjoying the continuation :)**_

* * *

><p>The first thing I felt was warmth on my face, followed by the sounds of birds chirping outside. For a moment I didn't even remember falling asleep, but it had been a very long night and I was terribly exhausted.<p>

Bobby was discharged from the hospital, and we drove the long distance back to Sioux Falls and his home and it seemed that all three men were against stopping for rest. Even Bobby who was still recuperating from being stabbed just wanted to, as he said, "get his numb ass home already". Because of that we arrived at his house late, around three in the morning as a matter of fact.

After that I remembered helping to carry in our belongings, as well as setting up the sofa for Bobby in his library since he couldn't take the stairs to his bedroom any longer. Then... I remembered tidying up the kitchen for him and setting a pot of coffee for the morning. Falling asleep however, I couldn't figure out when that had happened.

When I felt someones fingertips graze across my forehead, brushing the hair away, I unfortunately was forced to open my eyes.

"Mornin', beautiful." Dean said, giving me a smile.

I sat up slightly, and it took me a few long seconds to realize I was in one of the spare bedrooms upstairs at Bobby's. I can admit that waking up to seeing Dean smiling at me was more than pleasant.

"Good morning." I replied finally. "How did I get up here, Dean?"

"You fell asleep at the kitchen table last night. Didn't look too comfortable so I carried you up here."

"Oh," I sat up further, noticing he obviously hadn't slept in here with me since he was dressed and wearing his boots. "Well I'm sorry if I slept in too late."

"Nah," He rolled off the bed now. "Been a rough few days, so you kinda needed it."

"Can I ask what the plans are for today?"

He moved to the window and peaked out past the dusty curtains. "Not sure. I guess... Hiding from the devil?"

That made me scowl at him, which of course made him snigger. "Well that's a given, Dean. So, does that mean you don't intend to leave anytime soon?"

"I figured that we'd stick it out here a few days, make sure that Bobby's gonna be okay here by himself, and also stick around until we've come across something that can actually help us. Cause, right now... We got a steaming pile of jack shit."

I fell back onto the pillows after that, staring at the ceiling. Things were difficult enough when we were trying to stop Lilith from breaking seals. Now... Now the devil was let loose and it seemed we were more buggered than before. Not only that but Sam and Dean were at odds, they weren't speaking much now a days and when they did there was obvious venom laced in Dean's voice. Bobby was injured almost fatally and was now paralyzed, and my father was wandering about the planet in search of God which of course would be completely pointless because Chuck wasn't going to suddenly spring forth and announce his true identity. So, I had to conclude that Dean was right in the sense that we had a steaming pile of jack shit on our hands.

"Hey," He flopped down next to me again, jarring the headboard into the wall. "You okay?"

I forced off a small smile and nodded. "I'm fine, Dean. I suppose I'm just tired still."

"Uhuh, right-" He eyed me closely. "Except that's not it, cause you're as bad a liar as your old man."

At the mention of Castiel I frowned even more. "How do you do it, Dean? The constant chaos and wondering if you're going to make it to another sunrise?"

He sighed at that, resting his chin on my stomach. "Ain't gonna lie... Sometimes I almost can't do it. It's not easy, you know that. Which I guess is why I drink more than I should, and I'm not a very pleasant person to be around most of the time. But... That's the job, Laney. It ain't fun, it's messy and bloody and sometimes you come close to biting it."

"Do you ever regret taking this path?" I returned. "Do you ever wish that you hadn't followed in your fathers footsteps and became a hunter, and instead maybe... Maybe you lived normally?"

His eyes trailed over to the window and lingered there. "Sometimes I wonder what it would've been like. But I'm realistic, and I know that me being normal couldn't ever happen. It's not in my blood I guess." After a sigh he returned his eyes to mine. "Why? You thinkin' of taking off on me, huh?"

"No, don't be ridiculous, Dean." I grumbled. "Just... Trying to understand how we'll fix this is all."

"Why don't you let me and Sam worry about that. For right now though there's nothin' we can do, so let's just go downstairs, eat breakfast, and maybe we'll find something later."

Except we wouldn't, and we both knew that. Dean was just trying to keep me upbeat just as he had done Bobby while he was in the hospital. He had given some motivating speech about fighting and killing the devil, rot like that that I could tell wasn't at all how he really felt. No... Dean felt just as hopeless and helpless as I did right about then. But, just as always he had taken it upon himself to be the one to bear everything, to carry it all on his shoulders so he could protect everyone else. I honestly believed that if Dean Winchester didn't have someone to take care of... He'd lose his mind.

He rolled off the bed a second time and this time I slowly followed.

"So, you comin' down?" He asked, stopping at the door.

"Yes, I'll be down in a moment."

I watched him go with a very fake little smile, and once he was gone did I let it fade. I don't know why I was just so sullen all of a sudden, but I think it was just everything crashing down on me all at once.

Yes, I was so unbelievably thankful that Castiel was still alive, but there was still the unsettled matter of what happened to Gadreel. I think I had been purposely ignoring that, trying to pretend that whatever happened to him didn't happen. It was easier that way... Much easier. If I could just play make believe, envision that he was never taken away, that he didn't sacrifice himself for me or my father then... Then maybe it wouldn't hurt so bloody badly.

The thought of him back upstairs in heavens prison, being tortured again... I couldn't take it. But, there wasn't anything I could do to save him. There wasn't a way we could rescue him. Castiel was cut off from heaven, he barely had any powers left and I... Well I was just plain useless before so it's not as though I suddenly gained immaculate powers that would aid us along. No, as much as it hurt, as horrible and guilty as I felt, I knew that I couldn't allow myself to think about Gadreel again. Not anymore. Just as I had done when I believed Castiel was gone, I had to force those thoughts and painful memories away or else I would never be able to focus on what I needed to focus on.

But it wasn't so easy... Pretending that Gadreel didn't exist, that he hadn't done so much for me and the people I cared for. How terribly unfair it was that he was locked away again, when he was everything kind and good in the universe.

No, this simply would not do. I couldn't think about this anymore, dammit. I had things to do, people to help and... And a damn world that I was going to _attempt _to save with Sam and Dean.

After I was composed enough to leave the bedroom I made my way downstairs, slowing my steps once I reached the kitchen entrance.

For a moment I only stood there and observed the scene before me. How Sam and Dean were completely silent, not speaking to each other, barely even looking at each other either which made my gut twist into painful knots. And, then there was Bobby, who was sitting in his wheelchair at the kitchen window staring aimlessly off at nothing. He looked so miserable and sad, and unfortunately there was nothing I could do to help him. Castiel either didn't have the ability any longer... It seemed that for the moment Bobby didn't have any choice but to stay just the way he was right then.

"About damn time, Laney-" Dean said, motioning me over to the table. "Bacon's gettin' cold, come sit down."

He pulled out the chair beside him for me so I quickly sat down. Sam barely passed me a glance and one of his usual little smiles.

"So," He cleared his throat. "Any word from Cas since he took off?"

Dean barely acknowledged that Sam had spoken and instead stuffed a strip of bacon in his mouth.

"Oh, um-" I said, fidgeting anxiously in my seat. "No, he hasn't contacted me at all since he left, Sam."

He nodded, looking just as uncomfortable with the situation as I did right then. "What do you think the chances are that he might find something out there?"

"You mean with trying to find God?" I questioned.

"Yeah, that or... Well, since he's an angel maybe he'd be more likely to sense something's going on when it comes to Lucifer or whatever."

"Really don't think the devil's gonna slip up and let Cas know where he is, dude-" Dean responded before I could. "He's gonna be smarter than that."

"As far as Castiel locating God," I went on, cutting Dean off before he could snark at his brother any further. "If you want my honest opinion... I don't think he'll succeed."

"Why?" Sam leaned forward and rested his elbows on the table. "You think he just doesn't have the mojo anymore or-"

"I think that if God didn't want to be found then a piddly little pendant isn't going to do much of anything out there," I retorted. "I think that Castiel's going to search and search and possibly put himself in harms way and won't find anything, all the while God's holed up somewhere nice and safe and doesn't give a damn about what's happening in the world."

All right, maybe I was a little harsh with that statement, considering that Chuck had actually resurrected my father after he was killed. That proved that he wasn't completely heartless. But, when it came to Lucifer and the apocalypse it didn't seem as though Chuck had any intention of stepping in.

"Huh," Dean snorted. "Okay then, guess we know how she feels about God now."

I frowned. "Well I'm sorry if I dashed your hopes and dreams, but when you're held in prison for three centuries and continuously tortured, it tends to shake your faith just a tad, Dean." Just as always I made the situation even more awkward. "And, I suppose it makes me angry and upset that Castiel's out there right now putting himself in danger just to find him, when he can't."

Sam's forehead creased in concern. "But, you don't know that for sure, Laney. You never know... Maybe Cas would get lucky out there and find him?"

I snickered. "No, Sam. Trust me. He won't."

"How do you know?" Dean nudged me with the back of his hand. "You sound awfully damn sure."

And, just as always I nearly put my foot in my own mouth as I realized that I had almost spat out loud that I knew God personally, and where he lived.

"Uh," I fumbled now. "Well it's just... He's God. So, you would think that he's well aware of the goings on in the world, right? Naturally he would have known a long time ago, before it even happened, that Lucifer was escaping. Don't you think so?"

Dean's lips pursed. "Yeah, you're right. He would know. And, I'm gonna have to agree with you when you said he don't give a damn."

"Can we skip all this God and believin' nonsense?" Bobby chimed in. "It's giving me a headache."

We all three fell silent after that, and remained that way as I nibbled at some bacon. Sam and Dean finished their breakfasts as well, and it seemed we didn't know what to do next. Somehow I had a feeling that Bobby didn't want us lingering at his home any longer. He was angry and sad over what had happened to him, and because of that wanted to sit in solitude and silence. When his phone started ringing however and broke through that uncomfortable silence, he rolled his way over and grabbed it from the counter.

"Yeah?" He answered, then immediately I watched his face fall flat. "Rufus? What was that? You're breakin' up?" I could faintly hear shouting over the other end, along with static and gunfire. "River Pass? Yeah, yeah okay, just hold on I'll get someone up there..." The static intensified. "Rufus? Hello? Rufus?"

He hung up shortly after that, slamming the phone down on the counter and shouting "Balls!"

"What's goin' on, Bobby?" Dean asked.

"Something's happening with Rufus up in River Pass Colorado. Somethin' big by the sounds of it. Said something about a damn war goin' on over there, the town's divided and there's a shit ton of demons causing problems." He answered.

"Dammit," Dean was up and out of his chair in seconds. "Looks like we're makin' a drive then. Everyone get ready, we're leaving in ten."

There wasn't much for me to do since my bags were already packed, so I made a quick trip to the restroom and then minutes later we were throwing our bags in the trunk.

Really, I hated the thought of leaving Bobby alone, especially since he wasn't fully recovered from being stabbed. But... I honestly thought that if we didn't get out of there now, then he just might have pointed a shotgun at us.

* * *

><p>The first thing I did once I noticed the bridge washed out ahead was immediately panic. There was a terribly unsettling vibe I was getting from this area, from the town not a mile away, and somehow I had a feeling that everything was going to foul up beyond belief once we arrived.<p>

"Damn," Dean said, sighing as he stared down at the almost dry riverbed below. "Looks like we're hoofin' it from here on."

That made me shudder, because if we were going to be walking then that made a quick get away impossible. And, something told me that was going to be needed with this one.

"Grab the crap from the trunk," Dean went on, turning and making his way back for the Impala. "Don't overload on shit, just in case."

We grabbed the usual necessities, like our pistols of course and Sam and Dean took their sawed offs. I just as always had my angel blade with me, which was really all I needed. And after that we started off down the hill and up the other side, eventually making it to the outskirts of town.

And... I know I wasn't the only one that was in total shock at what I was looking at. The town looked as though a war had all but obliterated everything. There were smoking vehicles in the streets, buildings with large gaping holes in the wall and roofs, and... Eerily silent for a place that this Rufus claimed was crawling with demons. There didn't seem to be a sign of anyone alive, anywhere. Which of course only made that horrible unsettling feeling in the pit of my stomach much more prominent.

I followed the boys silently, watching as they did what they did best and tried _my _best to stay out of their ways. And, we made it quite a ways into town and still hadn't run into anyone. I was starting to wonder if the place had been abandoned by how silent it happened to be.

"I'm gonna go check out some of the businesses on Main street." Sam announced. "I'll meet you back here in fifteen minutes."

"Hold it," Dean rose his hand. "You're not goin' off alone, Sam. Rufus said there's demons here, and by the sounds of it there's a lot, so-"

"Knock it off, Dean." Sam interrupted. "I can do this on my own, would you stop treating me like a five year old and at least act like we're professionals?"

Sam stomped off after that, keeping his shotgun raised and at the ready, making it a good twenty feet from us before Dean nudged me and whispered, "Go with him, Laney. Please?"

I sighed at that. "Will you be all right by yourself though?"

He glared at me now and nodded. "I'll be fine, just go. Keep an eye out on him, there's no tellin' what he might do if he runs into a black eyed bitch."

He took off quickly in the other direction, leaving me no choice but to chase after Sam who had just rounded a corner and disappeared down another street. Once I caught up with him, he immediately rolled his eyes.

"Guess Dean wants me to have a babysitter, huh?" He said.

"I'm sorry. He only wants to look out for you, Sam."

"No," He snorted. "He doesn't. What he's doing is saying even more that he doesn't trust me. He thinks I'm gonna go off the rails again, maybe take a couple hits off some demons we run into here."

I scowled bitterly. "Sam, this is hardly the time for a conversation like this. Now, I know that you're not going to make that mistake again. Dean, right at the moment, might not know that. But he will if you just show him that you're being truthful."

"Yeah," He stomped on ahead of me. "Right."

I had a feeling I was going to end up slapping the both of them pretty soon.

We continued on until coming to an old convenience mart as Sam inched his way to the door and peaked in through the glass.

"All clear." He stated, although I had that feeling already. Just as the entire town, this building showed no signs of life.

We slipped inside now, weaving through aisles until he came to a stop.

"What are we doing here, Sam?" I asked.

"If this town's really full of demons, then we need to stock up on some supplies. More then likely we're gonna have to find a place to hole up until we figure out a way to fix this crap." He started grabbing several containers of salt. "We're gonna need this, just in case."

I nodded, grabbing containers of salt myself and stuffing them into my small backpack.

"If there really are demons here," I said now. "What do you think they're doing attacking this town?"

"Hard to say. We won't know until some actually show up."

"That's frightening. Having to wait to be attacked to know what's actually happening here."

"Well if we could just find Rufus, then-"

His words cut off when the bell above the door jingled and he quickly latched onto my wrist and yanked me down to the floor. I knew better than to speak in situations like this and only followed his lead as we stayed low and moved towards the end of the aisle, peaking around the shelves to see two young men in camouflaged garb and hunting rifles walk inside.

"Demons?" He whispered quietly.

"I... I don't know. I can't see their true faces any longer." I replied.

"Fuck." He muttered after that. "Okay, just stay behind me then."

As the young men started through the market, I believe Sam and I caught their reflections in the cooler glass at the exact same time. And... No doubts we both spotted their coal black eyes as well.

It was official, those men were demons, and it didn't seem as though Sam wanted to linger any longer and instead started pulling me with him as we crawled down the aisles in attempts at sneaking away. How we were going to manage getting the door open without that blasted bell jingling however was going to to prove rather tricky. And, once we stopped there Sam realized that too.

He cringed at that, then glanced back at me.

"On three, we run, okay?" He whispered and I only nodded in return. "One... Two..."

He seemed to forget the number three as he jumped up and kicked the door open, dragging me out with him as we started running from the convenience mart like we were on fire. Naturally the demons inside started immediately chasing after us, and I had no damned idea where we were going as we flew down side streets and leaped over burnt debris and around destroyed vehicles. As it turns out... It probably would have served us better had we simply killed those two demons instead of running, because the farther we went the more seemed to be appearing from out of no where and joining in on the chase.

I barely managed to glance over my shoulder as we ran, noticing three more demons had joined the previous two and didn't seem to be slowing down at all. But, why would they? They were supernatural creatures and could go on and on and on without tiring. Sam and I, well... We were flawed in the sense that he was human and I was half, which meant we couldn't run continuously with never stopping.

My side started to ache the farther we went, and our paces slowed only a split second as he jerked me off the road and down a crowded alley. I nearly lost my footing after that, stumbling over rubbish and other things and if it weren't for his keeping a firm grip on my wrist I would have fallen straight on my face.

At the end of the alley was yet another damn alley, one that wasn't as confining and tight. That's when he finally slowed us to a stop.

"We gotta fight them off, Laney." He said, out of breath. "They're just gonna keep coming after us if we don't."

I nodded and pulled out my angel blade, not even pausing to think about the frightening situation as I readied myself. Unfortunately weapons such as guns would do no good in this situation, so our pistols were useless. It was going to require getting up close and personal, which wasn't what I preferred at all if I found myself in a altercation like this. My fighting skills were more than rusty.

The two demons from the convenience mart appeared on one end of the alley, the other three appeared behind us, enclosing us in.

Sam turned a quick circle, cursing quietly under his breath and I could tell he was struggling to conjure up a way to get us both out of this alive. His solution was practically backing me into a brick wall and shielding me with his body as the demons inched their way closer.

All five of them were flashing those awful black eyes at us and Sam was just waiting for one of them to make a move. And, seconds after two of them did.

They dove at him and with a few quick swipes Sam instantly took one down. After that, the remaining four went insane and all came flooding at us. And, as gallant as it was for Sam to try and shield me, I wasn't about to stand there while he got himself gutted. So I pushed past him, interceding one demon as he struggled to pull a hand gun from his leather vest. I stabbed him right in the throat, and as I waited for the sure tell sign I had just killed a demon... I didn't get it.

There was no flashing under his skin, no horrid ghastly face appearing for a split second before he died... There was nothing but a painful grunt from the man, along with a spurt of blood before he fell to the ground.

For the moment I couldn't take the time to ponder over what that meant, because I was quickly tackled by another demon whose hands went straight for my throat. And, just as the one I had stabbed seconds earlier, he was taken out just as easily. I stabbed him right in the ribs, he grunted and gasped before collapsing on top of me and seconds later the last demon Sam took down without so much as getting out of breath.

Once they were all dead, the alley littered with bleeding bodies, Sam yanked me back to my feet and we shared an unusual glare.

"That was... Easy." He said, then passed a quick glance to his demon knife that was dripping in blood.

"Wasn't it?" I replied. "Perhaps they weren't well skilled demons, hm?"

"Uh," He eyeballed the blood dripping off the demon blade before quickly bending over and wiping it clean on one of the dead men's jackets. "Yeah, must've been. But, at any rate, we need to keep moving. We ran pretty far from where we're supposed to meet Dean, and he's bound to be freaking out by now."

Dammit, I just hoped Dean hadn't ran into as many demons as we had. He was alone... And now I was officially scared out of my mind at that thought.

We started back in the direction we just came from, making certain to stay quiet and examine every square inch of the area just in case more hell spawn decided to jump out at us. Thankfully though it was quiet for the moment.

"You did pretty good back there." Sam commented. "You're not as rusty anyways."

"It seems I don't do so bad just as long as I don't have the opportunity to thoroughly think about what's happening. The more I think... The more I panic." I replied.

"I think that's the same for everyone."

But not everyone was placed in a situation that involved fighting off demons. Normal people had normal worries to concern themselves with. Family drama, paying the bills on time or putting food on the table. Normal people, if thrust into a situation like this, would have crawled in a corner and sobbed like a baby. Which, is what I wanted to do sometimes and I was far from normal.

"Are you doing all right, Sam?" I asked, breaking the silence.

"Yeah," He nodded. "Fine, why?"

"Because we just killed five demons in that alley way and-"

"What?" He came to a halt. "You starting to think too that I might have wanted to take a drink from one of them?"

That made me flinch as I was taken aback. "Actually, that thought never even crossed my mind believe it or not. I was just making certain you were all right."

I scowled up at him as I stomped past and continued on in the direction where we were to meet Dean.

"Laney," He sighed, jogging to catch up. "Sorry, I'm sorry. I guess I just get overly defensive when it comes to that now."

"Yes, I understand that, Sam." I spat back. "And I also know that I couldn't possibly understand what it's like to have an addiction like that, but-" I skidded to a stop. "I _do _understand what it's like to be different. Remember, you're the one who first said that. That you and I might be more inclined to be sympathetic towards each other due to what's coursing through both our veins, hm?"

He nodded. "I know."

"So stop bloody biting my head off for trying to help you, dammit." I took a few more steps but then stopped a second time. "You know, you might think that the only reason why I'm so interested in being your friend is because of how I feel about your brother, but that's not the reason. I care about you too, Sam, believe it or not. So stop being an ass before I shove my fist in your face." I started walking a third time and he followed after me. "And, for your information I'm going to have the same damn talk with Dean, and if he doesn't knock off his shenanigans as well then he'll be eating my fist too!"

He was silent after that for a good thirty seconds, and long enough for me to regret exploding at him like that before he suddenly started chuckling.

"What's so damn funny?" I asked, clearly pouting now.

"Nothing, Laney." He snickered still. "Just... You're literally perfect for my brother. He needs someone that's gonna kick his ass every now and then."

"Well that's lovely and all, but you need your ass kicked as well sometimes."

"Yeah, maybe." He pulled me to a stop. "Okay, really... I'm sorry for being a dick. I know you're just trying to help, and you're just looking out for me and Dean both. I guess we're just not used to something like that. I mean, other than Bobby, there really hasn't been anyone else that's given a crap. Our dad was... Yeah, let's just say he wouldn't have won any Father of the Year awards, so... Having someone really care about our welfare is pretty weird to us, Laney."

"Well," I rose my brows at him. "You had better get used to it. Because that's going to be a regular occurrence now a days."

"All right, fine. I guess I can deal with that."

He left me behind now as his long legs picked up their pace and now I had to jog to catch up with him. Eventually we came back to the area where we were to meet Dean, and as soon as we rounded the corner of a tall brick building we slowed to a stop.

Dean was there waiting for us, pacing back and forth but he wasn't alone.

"Isn't that..." I squinted. "Yes, that's Ellen isn't it?"

Sam nodded. "Yeah, looks like it."

We started towards them and made it a few feet closer when both Ellen and Dean turned and spotted us. After that it felt as though I was just socked straight in the stomach, and Sam quickly grabbed me and yanked me to a stop.

"Oh shit..." He muttered.

After seeing his reaction did I know that I wasn't only hallucinating... Dean and Ellen both had jet black eyes... They'd been possessed.

"What... What do we do, Sam?" I asked, my heart racing.

"We run." He replied, then for the millionth time he started dragging me with him as we took off running.

"Hey!" I heard Dean shout. "Where the fuck are you going?!"

Oh Jesus, he didn't even sound the same. There was a shrill harshness to his voice that hadn't been there before that made my blood run cold.

How in the world had Dean been possessed? He and Sam both had their tattoos that were supposed to prevent that very thing from happening! But, that didn't matter right now... What mattered is that Dean was possessed, Ellen as well, and we needed to get away at least long enough to find some way of exorcising them without having to hurt them.

When I felt someone hook an arm around my waist I couldn't help but let out a loud shrill shriek in response as I was literally lifted from my feet and thrown to the ground.

It was Dean, or... The demon in Dean, and he quickly jumped on top of me and straddled my waist, pinning my arms down at my side.

"Stop!" He shouted, as I struggled like mad to break free. "You get the hell outa her!" My movements froze slightly as I stared up at Dean's black eyes and he started quickly reciting something in Latin. "_Exorcizamus te, omnis immundus spiritus omnis satanica potes-"_

But, it was cut short when Sam appeared and socked Dean square in the jaw, which flung him off of me. Sam pulled me up after that as we yet again started running, passing by Ellen who Sam must have knocked out before getting Dean off of me. We somehow managed a good distance away, turning down a side street and ducking down another alley before losing them all together. And, we kept on running until we were certain they weren't going to catch up before coming to a stop behind a row of smoking houses.

"Oh gods..." I breathed out, doubling over and trying not to hyperventilate. "What are... What are we going to do, Sam? They're both possessed."

"I know," He huffed, bracing against the wall to try and catch his breath as well. "Things just went from bad to much much worse."

"He was insane," I went on, biting back tears. "It didn't make sense that he was reciting that exorcism prayer at me, why was he doing that?"

"I don't know. Maybe it was some kind of sick joke to him or something. Maybe that just proves that whatever kind of demons are in them, they're immune to being exorcised?"

Dammit I hoped not... If that were so then how in the world would we ever save them?

But that seemed to be the least of our problems now, as two more figures suddenly appeared from out of no where and charged at Sam and I. Before being whacked straight in the head and passing out, I saw a flash of golden blonde hair and Jo's vicious snarl along with another pair of jet black eyes.


	4. Chapter 4

Muffled voices were the first thing that pierced through the cloud of blank nothingness in my mind. Not long after that was the stabbing pain from being walloped on the side of the head in the first place.

It didn't take me long at all to remember what had happened. A town full of demons... Sam and I killing several of them before discovering that Dean and Ellen had been possessed as well. Dean chasing me down, tackling me and... Well, everything just down spiraled from there.

When I finally managed to force my eyes open, the dim light was too much and made me cringe. And, obviously I was shackled to the chair I sat in, to the the point I could barely breathe as a matter of fact.

Normally it wouldn't have been difficult for me to snap the binds around me, with being nephilim that wasn't anything I couldn't tackle. But... There was something very much different about the chains that were encircling me.

"Well," I heard Jo say. "It's about damn time you woke up."

I wobbly moved my gazes across the room, spotting first Sam strapped down in his own chair in the center of a devils trap that had been painted on the ceiling. He was gagged for the moment, but awake, as he cast desperate looks in my direction.

"What..." I garbled. "What's happening?"

"Like you don't know," Jo snickered. "You think you can just jam yourself down a nephilim's throat and we're gonna sit back and do nothing about it?"

I squinted up at her, unable to respond to that before she threw a bucket of holy water in my face.

Naturally I sputtered, surprised by the suddenly cold wetness, but when she didn't receive the sizzle and scream she wanted her sneer faded.

Not only that, but... Her eyes were black... She was possessed and yet she was throwing holy water on me? What sense did that make?

"What's going on?" I asked, staring up at her past the now soaked hair in my eyes. "Why can't I move?"

"Spelled chains." She answered. "I didn't even know a nephilim could get possessed, but once we realized you were, Rufus took measures to make sure you couldn't bust out," She motioned to the chains. "Angel _and _demon warding is inscribed on those, so... You're not going anywhere."

Dammit... Well I supposed that explained why I couldn't bust out now didn't it?

"You're mistaken, Jo. I'm not possessed and neither is Sam." I said now.

"Right," She snorted. "Then, uh... What's with the black eyes, sweetheart?"

"Funny, I was going to ask the same thing about you." I retorted. "You're sporting some glossy black eyes yourself there, love."

She crossed her arms and shook her head. "Right, nice try."

Sam started to speak through his gag after that, but all that would come out was muffled mumbling. Jo's response was stomping over and backhanding him across the face that instantly busted his nose. She followed suit with throwing some holy water on him now, and yet again she didn't get the response she was hoping for.

"See," I said. "Obviously we're not possessed because the holy water's doing nothing!"

"Shut up." She stomped across the room and out the door, slamming it behind her.

Once she was gone I wriggled about in my chair as well as I could, trying my best to somehow slip out of the chains but it was impossible.

"What the bloody hell is going on around here?" I asked.

Sam huffed at that, mumbling past his gag again before somehow managing to maneuver himself out of it.

"I don't know," He breathed out, ignoring his bloody nose. "It doesn't make sense that friggin' demons would be trying to exorcise _other _demons."

I glanced around the room, seeing it dark but for the lit fireplace and the slight sliver of light that peaked in past dark curtains. Above me, just as it was with Sam, was another devils trap painted on the ceiling.

Since I couldn't bust out of my chains I opted instead for bouncing and wriggling some more until the chair slowly but surely started to scoot and drag across the wood floors. Undoubtedly I was making a horrible racket which would send anyone and everyone in the house straight for us, but I kept moving and jumping around until I managed to be free from the devils trap at least.

"Keep going." Sam said. "Not sure where this is gonna get us, but keep going."

I kept bouncing until I heard a sudden snap and crack as the front left leg of my chair caught on a crooked floor board and broke off. I went crashing to the floor after that, my face slamming straight into Sam's knee.

"Shit," He said. "Are you okay."

"Ugh," I groaned, feeling my head ache even more. "Oh I'm sodding fantastic!"

I was right however about the racket gaining unwanted attention, because no sooner had I hit the floor did the door burst open while Jo and a man I didn't know came barging inside.

"What the hell?" Jo asked. "Rufus... How did she get out of the devils trap?"

"Maybe it's because I'm not a god damned demon!" I snapped back.

"Grab 'er," Rufus said. "I don't get what the hell's goin' on around here either."

They both grabbed me and yanked me to my feet, and thankfully the chains loosened with my fall at least enough that I got one arm free. Before I was subdued again I swung at whoever was at my left, hearing Rufus grunt before flying across the room and hitting the wall. Seconds after that I turned and swung again and now Jo went flying.

Spelled chains were not at all fun, they zapped away whatever energy I might have had; and that wasn't very much seeing is that I had been cut off from heaven. Still, I fell to my knees and crawled my way to Sam, using my free hand to loosen his ropes at least enough that he could wiggle free. After that he had to get me out of the chains because I couldn't bloody move in them, and after that he literally dragged me from the room and down the stairs.

We passed a few strangers as we ran, and they didn't hesitate to start firing at us which immediately made me shriek in panic.

Not stopping though, we made it to the front door and out of the house, rounding the side and past the back yard and picket fence and to who the hell knows where. Running just seemed to be the only plan for right now, which was good enough for me, and we didn't stop for several long minutes and until the house and street were far in the distance.

Coming to a stop by a clutter of destroyed vehicles, we crouched down and tried to catch our breaths.

"Now what?" I spat. "We just keep running and hope that maybe all of the demons possessing everyone decides to up and leave on their own accord?"

Sam didn't have to look at me for me to know he was rolling his eyes. "No, obviously that's not the plan, Laney."

"Then... What? Because we haven't any weapons, nothing that can fight against demons and it seems to be the entire damn town is full of them."

I could see the gears turning inside his head as he tried to conjure up some sort of reputable plan. But, even for someone like Sam this was going to be difficult. And, no I was never really very optimistic in the past, but it seemed with this situation whatever sort of positive thoughts were completely sucked away into oblivion.

But, obviously our first issue at hand was somehow subduing Dean and exorcising the demon in him. After that, we could figure out the rest together. Dean however, was mine and Sam's first priority.

"So," He said, and I could tell that whatever he was about to ask he was hesitant about it. "You don't have any powers right now? Nothing?"

I frowned. "Well I don't really know, Sam. I would say no, seeing is that I don't even have the ability of seeing demons faces any longer."

"But you don't know for sure?" He replied. "You don't know whether or not, yes or no, you have any powers?"

"Well, no... I don't know for certain but I don't exactly want to go up against a crazy demon and then discover I'm no more use than a bloody tree stump, Sam." I sighed and rubbed my head. "I think it would be a good idea if I called Castiel. Considering the severity of the situation, he's the only one that could help us."

"Yeah," He nodded. "Maybe you're right. Do that then."

I closed my eyes and after a deep breath said a quiet silent prayer to my father. I told him as much as I could with it being so short, sticking to the usual we were in trouble and going to get shredded if he didn't come and intervene. After telling him the towns name and the actual street Sam and I were crouched on, I ended the prayer and awaited the unmistakable sound of angel wings.

Nothing...

My brows furrowed at that as I closed my eyes and repeated the prayer quickly.

Nothing...

"Dammit what the hell's going on?" I murmured. "He must not be able to hear prayers any longer, and-" I felt inside my pockets and gritted my teeth. "And the dolts took my damn phone so I can't call him either!"

Sam sighed at that, resting his head against the car behind us. "Great, so Cas is a no go then."

"It seems so, Sam. I'm sorry. Not unless I can find a working payphone somewhere, but something tells me it's not going to be that easy either."

"Yeah," He took a good look around the area before standing. "Well, we can't just stay here out the open like this. For the moment we need to find a place to hide out, at least until we figure something out."

So, we started walking again; weaving in and out of broken vehicles and down alleys trying our best to avoid the main roads. Thankfully we didn't run into anymore demons, including Dean, and just as the sky was starting to darken with sunset did we find a small little house that was hidden behind a cluster of trees.

Going by the looks of it it had obviously been abandoned long before the town had ever been overrun with demons. The windows were boarded up, the yard was in shambles with tall grass, weeds and random pieces of rubbish. In short, it looked like hell but it was probably a decent spot for us to hole up until we worked out some sort of plan.

I followed Sam up through the trees, bypassing the open yard just in case someone might have spotted us, and we came to a stop just at the back porch of the house.

"Would feel a little better if I had some kind of weapon on me." Sam muttered absently. "Stay behind me, Laney."

I knew better than to argue by now, so I stayed silent and followed him up the back porch steps to the a partially opened door.

It creaked and groaned when he pushed it open, leaving a groove in a layer of dust that had settled on the floor. At least we could take comfort in the fact that the door obviously hadn't been opened in a while, but that's not speaking for any others. Still, inside was quiet, unnervingly so as a matter of fact, and I felt myself shuddering as we slipped in past what seemed to be an old laundry room and through the homes kitchen.

After thoroughly examining every square inch of the place, including the smelly basement, Sam deemed it safe enough for us to stay there. And, he managed to find an old can of paint in the basement, so he used it to paint devils traps at the front and back entrance, and then slapped up some warding sigils on the walls as well. It was the first time I had felt a tad bit safe since we stepped into this god forsaken town.

Hours passed after that, hours that dragged on so agonizingly slowly that I thought I would lose my mind. Everything was so silent outside around the property I halfway wondered if all of the demons had decided to run from this town.

That was a terrifying thought, thinking that perhaps they ran which meant that Dean would have been taken right along with them.

"Okay," Sam said, moving away from the window he sat at. "I'm going out there, I'm gonna find Dean."

"All right, but how are we going to stop him, Sam?"

"Not we," He shook his head. "You're staying here."

"Excuse me?" I snapped back quickly. "No, I'm not."

"Yes you are!" He barked and I felt myself flinch. "The last thing me or Dean needs is worrying about something happening to you out there. Since you're with me, you're my responsibility, and I'm not gonna let my brothers girlfriend get her ass killed out there." He sighed at that. "Look, it's not like I'm just ditching you here. I have a plan. I'm gonna go out there and find Dean and lure him back here. Hopefully we can somehow get him into one of those traps."

I crossed my arms and shook my head. "And what will Dean think when he finds out that I just let his little brother run off on his own in a town full of demons, Sam? He'll throttle me!"

"Well tough," He started through the house and to the back door. "You're staying here. Just wait by the window and watch for me, it shouldn't take long to see me."

"Yes, considering that you're probably going to be running for your damn life." I scowled. "Sam, if you really think I'm going to stay here then you've gone mad."

He didn't say anything else and just stomped out the backdoor, slamming it behind him.

Dammit! What the hell was I supposed to do?! If I chased after him he probably would have dragged me back and tied me down, and... And if I stayed and something happened to him... Dean would never forgive me. Sam couldn't go off on his own, this town was dangerous and...

Wait a minute... Where did he go?

Bloody hell... He was gone... That's what happens when I allow my mind to ramble like that!

I bolted the door after that, darting back for the window quickly to keep a look out. I hoped and prayed that this wasn't going to come back to bite me in the ass.

Several long minutes passed, then eventually an hour, and... Another hour... Until I was officially panicking because Sam had probably gone and gotten himself captured or something worse and there I was, perfectly safe and sound in that damn house and Dean was never going to forgive me!

No sooner had I nearly hyperventilated did I spot movement through the trees until two figures emerged. It didn't take me but two seconds to know it was Sam and Dean, and it didn't take me but two seconds to somehow spot their black eyes in the darkness.

Sweet baby Jesus, Sam had gotten possessed too... Oh gods...

And, not only that but they were going to bust in here and clearly Sam was going to the front door while Dean was going to the back, and I was trapped and...

No, I needed to not panic anymore than I already was. Yes, things were _horrible _right now, both Dean and Sam were possessed, I was alone and unarmed... But at least I still had the devils traps.

So, I darted for the first thing I could find in this house that could be used as a weapon, which was what was left of a broom that was basically just the handle. If I could just smack them with it a few times, maybe just maybe I could escape the house and start running. Either that, or knock them into the devils traps, exorcise them, therefore rescuing them both without even having to get my hands dirty.

Yes, that was just a pipe dream I believe... Because there wasn't a way I alone could accomplish that without fouling up beyond belief.

Still, I sneaked my way across the house until coming to the backdoor, hiding there so when it opened I would be behind it. And... All I could do now was wait.

A few minutes passed before I heard the stairs out back creaking and groaning before footsteps moved slowly across the porch. Before long I could see Dean's silhouette through the window and the knob slowly started to turn as he noticed it was locked.

The devils trap was painted a few feet from the back door, because as soon as it opened it would have scratched a line right through the paint, so I tried to figure out how I was going to whack Dean with the stick and manage to knock him into the trap without getting myself killed first. Oh and of course managing the same feat with Sam once he came barreling through the front door.

"Laney?" Dean, or the demon I mean, called out. "I'm comin' in, don't freak out on me!"

Nice try evil demon, I thought... But I wasn't going to fall for it.

He started ramming his shoulder against the door now until it finally cracked open, splintering the door frame while he was at it before he slowly took a step in. I waited until he had cleared the doorway before I lunged out of the darkness and smacked him across the back with the broom handle.

"Ow, dammit!" He shrieked. "Laney stop! It's me!"

"Right, like I'll believe that!" I screamed back then smacked him again, only this was across the stomach.

He grunted from the blow but recovered quick enough as he dove at me now and wrestled the broomstick out of my hands and pinned me to the wall.

"Laney stop!" He screamed again. "I'm not a demon, snap out of it!"

My response was kicking him in the knee then trying to push him across the room, but since he had a firm grip on my jacket he pulled me right along with him and we collided and rolled across the kitchen table and hit the floor with a thud.

Had this not been such a terrifying moment it might have actually been somewhat amusing, considering we looked like two monkey's smacking each other around.

I tried my best to pin him down like he had done with me the day before by straddling his stomach and holding his arms down but he was a lot stronger than I gave him credit for. Oh and of course the demon was possessing Dean, so naturally he was far more skilled at fighting than I was.

With a few swipes somehow I was flipped off of him and flattened on the floor as he rolled over and sat on me now.

"Dammit this really shouldn't be turning me on as much as it is," He spat, but then shook me by the shoulders. "Laney, knock it off. I'm not a damn demon, think about it... If I was a demon I would've snapped your neck by now!"

"Get off of me!" I screamed back, trying my best to swat at him but I couldn't move my arms.

"Stop it!" He shook me again. "Think about it, something's fucked up around here and you know it. Sam told me what happened earlier, how Jo and Rufus had you tied up in devils traps, but they had black eyes too, huh? Well me and Sammy figured out what was goin' on. It's war, Laney!"

I managed to get my arms free and smacked at him, then bit him on the wrist which resulted in him screaming and flattening me again.

"War, Laney!" He said again. "The fucking horseman!"

That made me freeze slightly as I stared up at him. "What?"

"The horseman, you know the story, the four horsemen of the apocalypse?" He went on. "He's making everyone in town flip out and you're hallucinating."

I stopped fighting against him now as I stared up at him. "Are you sure about that?"

"Yes," He sighed. "Trust me, I'm not a demon, Laney."

Now that I was calming down some and catching my breath, it did seem as though he could have been telling the truth. It would certainly explain why Jo and Rufus were trying to exorcise Sam and I, why Dean tried to do the same thing earlier even though his eyes were black.

I fidgeted slightly, peering around the room before returning my attention to him. And, suddenly like someone snapped their fingers his black eyes vanished and returned to their usual green.

"Are we good now?" He asked.

"Um," I shifted slightly staring down at where he was sitting on me. "I believe so, yes."

Seconds later I heard the front door burst open as Sam bounded through the house and stopped in the doorway.

"Uh," He said, snickering. "Should I maybe give you two five more minutes?"

"Shut up, Sam." Dean replied, then climbed off of me and helped me to stand. "Okay, well now that we're all on the same page here I think we should keep moving."

"I'm so sorry, Dean." I said, inching closer and rubbing my hand across his back where I hit him. "I didn't hurt you too badly did I?"

"Uh," He fumbled on his feet a moment. "Nah, I'll live... Nothin' I can't handle."

Now I practically knocked him over when I crushed him with a hug. "I was so scared when I thought you were possessed, it was so horrible."

I didn't even realize Sam was still standing there and just kissed him. It couldn't be helped, it had to be done, because I truly was scared to death when I thought he'd gotten possessed. It must have lasted longer than I figured because I heard Sam shifting on his feet awkwardly before clearing his throat loudly.

Dean pulled away after that, blinking several times over before groaning quietly, "Not now boner."

"Yeah I'm still here, guys." Sam stated.

"Shut up, Sam." Dean said again, then shook off whatever he was feeling. "Yeah let's get outa here."

He led the way to the door as we slipped out the back and passed through the trees.

"So," I said. "What exactly is the plan? If it it really is a horseman at work here then how do we find him and how do we stop him?"

"Dean already figured out which guy it is." Sam answered. "Some dude that was holed up at the church with a group of survivors."

"We passed a payphone on the way back here," Dean added. "You're gonna call Cas up and tell him to get his ass here and help us."

"Sounds like a good idea." I replied. "A horseman doesn't sound like someone we should deal with alone."

Especially since I had zero powers and would probably wind up getting all of us killed if I tried to help. I wasn't delusional, I knew better than to believe I was some great warrior that could run straight into battle and slay every foe in front of me. Instead I was more like... The village idiot... The one that would dance around and entertain the locals and keep their spirits up during times of distress.

Yes I suppose I did manage to kill on occasion when I absolutely had to, so maybe I did have the potential of eventually gaining some sort of skill. But for right now I still needed a lot more work. I wasn't like other women hunters like Jo or Ellen, ones that grew up in a life like this and were accustomed to swinging blades and slicing off heads.

The payphone Dean spoke of was in the back of an old pharmacy, which thankfully was free and clear of any crazy people. I rushed to it and threw in the proper amount of change and quickly dialed Castiel's number, waiting as it rang a good three times before he finally answered.

"Who is this?" Was his response, obviously because he didn't recognize the number on the caller ID.

"Castiel, it's me." I said.

"Alana? Why are you-"

"We need your help," I cut him off. "Just get to River Pass Colorado as soon as you can, we're in O'Leery's pharmacy on-"

"I'm here." He suddenly said, appearing behind us. "What's going on?"

I dropped the phone receiver and just as always crushed him with a hug, and moments later Sam and Dean filled him in on the situation and we started off down the dark streets again.

We met up with Rufus, Ellen and Jo a short time later who also had been filled in on what was going on, so that meant they no longer saw black eyes on us, and the same with us to them. It was nice that no one was throwing punches or holy water any longer, but that still didn't erase the fact that everyone _else _in this town thought the other half were demons. Which meant it was still a crazy war zone and if we weren't extremely careful we would be stuck right in the center of it again.

Locating the horseman didn't seem to be so simple, even with having my father there with us. And we ended up wandering all over the damn town until dawn.

As the sky was starting to brighten with sunrise, we eventually found ourselves back in the main part of town, where most of the destruction had taken place. That, incidentally, is when everything exploded.

A crowd of people just appeared from out of no where, all of which thought we were demons. They charged at us, some armed with knives and axes, others had hand guns which they started firing.

We all scattered after that. Castiel grabbed me and drug me off the street in the direction of a nearby alley, and I have no idea what happened to everyone else. Eventually though Jo and Ellen joined us there as Castiel moved to the end of the alley to take a quick look.

"I see him." He stated. "The horseman."

No sooner had he said that did he disappear into the crowd of people.

"We need to distract them." Jo said. "Lure those assholes away so Sam and Dean can take that fucker down."

With no opportunity to talk it over we all three ran back out into the street and I grabbed the nearest object I could find, which was a few rocks, and started pelting them at the crowd of people. Anything to get their attention off of Sam, Dean and Castiel as they were clearly chasing down some man in a dark suit that was darting for a bright red vehicle parked at the end of the street.

And, throwing rocks at them seemed to do the trick as a good twenty people came charging at the three of us and we started running in the opposite direction.

Considering Ellen and Jo were human, they could be killed with just a whack to the head if it was hard enough. Myself? Well... Being nephilim I could only die by an angel blade, at least under normal circumstances. Now that I was cut off from heaven I wasn't certain if that still applied. But, still... I slowed my pace as I allowed Ellen and Jo to get far ahead of me.

I was tackled quickly after that by five people. Ellen and Jo disappeared around a corner and out of sight, so I hoped I had stalled the crowd at least long enough for them to get away.

I felt a few hard punches on the back of my head before I managed to fling a few people away. I was never more thankful to have that unnatural strength as I was right then. And, I kept trying to remind myself over and over again that these people weren't evil. They were just manipulated and frightened because of the horseman. I had already killed two men the day before because I thought they were demons, so I couldn't kill anyone else. As frightened as I was, and as eager as they were to kill me, in all essence they were innocent.

Before I could get piled on again I felt someone grab me from under my arms and start to drag me away.

"What the hell are you doing?!" Jo shrieked. "Get your ass up, you're not gonna sacrifice yourself today!"

Well that was a surprise...

Not that it mattered that she had come back for me, because we were quickly surrounded.

"So," She said, out of breath. "Got any ideas how to get out of this one?"

I snickered and felt my eyes roll. "You should have just kept on running. They can't kill me."

"Not the point." She snapped back. "You don't leave someone behind, it's like a code or something."

Before those with actual guns could start firing we both started throwing punches and managed to hold them off for at least a good minute. After that it was like a burst of wind suddenly zipped through the crowd as people started soaring left and right. They landed with a hard crunch to the pavement, but were still alive and relatively unscathed. Castiel appeared shortly after that and blocked Jo and I.

Some dumb git in the crowd started shooting after that, hitting Castiel in the chest several times over which as we all know is completely pointless. But after that happened, suddenly it was like a switch went off in all of the people still standing as they stopped and gaped at us in obvious confusion.

"Go home." Castiel said. "It's over now."

There was some jumbled questions thrown around the group before I spotted Sam, Dean and Rufus making their way up the street. I darted for them after that, meeting them halfway and coming to a stop.

"You got him?" I asked.

Dean nodded and held up a plain gold ring. "Yeah, we got him, Laney."

He had a bleeding cut on his temple, Sam was cradling his shoulder and Rufus seemed perfectly well and fine, considering.

Well, that was one horseman down. But something told me that the other three weren't going to be near this easy.

* * *

><p>A day later we had driven a good distance from River Pass, and since things were calm for the moment Castiel returned to his never ending search for God. Still, I wasn't happy about that and <em>still <em>I couldn't say anything about it.

But, Sam and Dean had taken down an actual horseman, which was indeed a great accomplishment. They were keeping his ring stored in a lock box in the trunk of the Impala, and for the moment I don't know what they intended to do with it.

But, that wasn't really an issue right now... I came to notice, once we had driven another fifty miles and parked at a rest stop, that something was clearly wrong with Sam.

He was quiet and distant... Much more than usual because that just seemed to be his personality. But, it was enough that Dean noticed it right off. We had seated ourselves at a picnic table to much on some snacks from the vending machine, and after several long minutes of silence and enjoying the scenery around us, Sam let out a sigh.

"So, I was thinking," He started. "That... Maybe you were right, Dean."

Naturally I noticed the look in Sam's eyes, and the tone of his voice so I quickly moved to stand.

"Maybe I should just yet you two talk in private." I said.

"That's okay, Laney... You don't have to." Sam replied. "You can stay."

I shifted on my feet, crunching my potato chip bag in my hands before awkwardly sitting again. "Well, all right... If you're sure?"

He ignored that question and instead moved his attention back to Dean.

"Anyways, yeah... Like I said, maybe you were right."

"About?" Dean shrugged.

Sam tapped his fingertips on the table anxiously before continuing. "You were right when you said I wasn't ready to be out there fighting again. That... I was still weak. I thought that I was okay, that I had a handle on things, but when we were back in River Pass and Laney and me killed those guys in the alley... I don't know. Something took over. And, I realized after that that it's still there." He cringed slightly. "That craving... And... I know now that you're right and I shouldn't be fighting because I'm a danger to everyone around me if I'm like that, not just myself."

My heart plummeted to my stomach after that. I had so desperately hoped that Sam really had gotten a hold of himself, that he could control himself around demons now.

"Yeah, well-" Dean sighed after that, not seeming at all surprised to hear what he said. "What do you plan to do about it then, huh?"

"Sam," I chimed in before he could respond. "You're stronger than you think. Yes you might have still felt that craving but what matters is that you walked away from it. You didn't do anything about it, so-"

"No, Laney," He shook his head. "You have no idea how hard it was to walk away from that, and they weren't even really demons. If they had been demons, then... There's no way of knowing what I would've done. I probably would have fallen completely off the deep end. And, that's just a risk I'm not willing to take anymore. I can't. There's too much at stake now, so..." He nodded, swallowing a few times over. "I think it's a good idea if I just go my own way for a while. Take a break from all of this. No more hunting for me, not until I know I've worked my way past this."

I turned to Dean, fully expecting him to argue with that and rant and rave. To call his brother an idiot, to threaten to lock him down and throw him in the trunk to prevent him from running away, but... No such thing happened. He didn't say or do any of that and even more so I felt my heart plummet to my stomach.

"Yeah," He said instead. "You might be right about that, Sammy. Truth is... Is that I spend so much time worrying about you that I can't really focus on anything else. And, like you said, there's too much at stake. I gotta be in this all the way, I can't let my mind be half on the job and half worrying about what you're gonna do."

Sam seemed equally surprised that Dean wasn't putting up a fight either.

"So..." He stood from the table.

"Wait," I jumped back to my feet. "You're leaving _now_?"

"I think that's a good idea, Laney, yeah."

Dammit, why was Dean just sitting there like that?!

"Take it easy out there, Sammy." Dean said now, not bothering to stand. "Call me once you get to wherever it is you're goin'."

"Yeah, I will." He smiled faintly then nodded to me. "You guys watch yourselves out there."

And he turned and walked away, grabbing his duffel from the trunk of the Impala and making his way across the lot and to a truck that was parked.

I watched as he spoke with the driver for a few seconds before climbing in the passenger seat, and... They drove away.

He just drove away... He drove away and Dean sat there like a bump on a log and didn't bother to move or even watch him go.

What in the world was happening? What had changed so much that Dean would actually let his little brother run off on his own like that with no arguments?

Gods... This was just horrible.


	5. Chapter 5

I didn't expect him to talk to me about this. In true Dean Winchester fashion he was going to hold everything he was feeling inside, and try to mask the pain and misery by drinking continuously. Sam had left a week ago, and since then Dean had been nothing short of confusing. Like I had said, I expected him to drink his troubles away, avoid speaking to me about the pain of his brother walking away, but... He didn't do any of that. As a matter of fact he had been nothing but charming for the last week which... I didn't know what to think of that.

We had been driving for those days, looking for some sort of job to occupy our time until we got some sort of clue on how to take down Lucifer. And, we finally stumbled onto something that Dean had claimed might have been vampires. But, since we arrived in town too late to question any victims, or victims families, the only thing we could do was book a room in one of our usual motels.

I waited in the car, trying to stay awake while Dean ran into the motel office and booked our rooms, only to return a short time later with a perturbed expression. After he climbed behind the wheel and cranked the car in reverse did I finally question him.

"Is something wrong?"

He glanced at me before snickering. "Don't think I went and did this on purpose, because I didn't."

"What?" I retorted, my brows furrowed. "Did what on purpose?"

"They were booked, no adjoining rooms and the last one they had was a single, so... Don't think I did it on purpose cause I didn't."

I nodded at that. "I see. And you're fretting over us having to share a bed?"

"What?" He pulled to a stop at what was obviously our room. "No, I don't care about it... Not like we haven't slept in the same bed before. I just didn't want you to think that I planned this to happen."

I snickered now. "Dean, we're not children. And I'm not some delicate flower that's going to pitch a fit about having to share a bed with you."

"Okay," He turned off the engine. "Then we don't got any problems."

He winked at me before jumping out of the car and moving to the trunk to grab our duffel bags. Really I was so exhausted from the constant driving for an entire week straight I wasn't even going to have the opportunity to sit and think about Dean and I sharing a bed together again. And even if I was going to think about it, it's not as though it was going to faze me at all since it had happened a few times now. Dean and I had gotten to the point where we were completely comfortable around each other. Or, well... I suppose I was the only one that might have been awkward or uncomfortable in the beginning, but... I had definitely improved over the months. Being with Dean everyday was just as natural to me as breathing now, so... Only an immature and naive girl would get so worked up over something as silly as sharing a bed.

I followed him to the door and he fiddled around with the key for a good minute before finally managing to get it unlocked and shoving it open. It was dark, but it didn't matter. I could already smell the usual stink of a run down establishment such as this. Not to mention the scent of booze and cigarette smoke had successfully seeped its way into the walls.

Once Dean reached inside and flicked on the lamp he cringed. "Sheesh... Pretty sure this is worse than anything I've ever stayed in before."

We both moved inside and I was inclined to agree with him. It wasn't so much the cigarette smoke infused walls, or the odd smell of body odor that was enough to knock over a horse. I think it was the large noticeable stains on the bed covers and carpet.

"Well," I sighed. "I suppose it's better than sleeping on the streets?"

"We'd be better of crashing in the car tonight," Dean grumbled, then threw our bags down on a tattered old armchair. "Well, whatever. We paid for it so I guess we'll make the best of it. You want first dibs on the shower?"

I nodded. "If you don't mind?"

"Nah, go ahead. I'll order a pizza or somethin', so don't take forever."

After grabbing my sleep clothes and shower supplies, I locked myself in the bathroom and felt myself shudder. It wasn't much better than the bedroom, and the smell definitely hadn't improved any. If at all, it was only that much worse because the clear and pungent scent of urine was prevalent. I choked back a gag as I pulled open the shower curtain, and nearly thanked the stars that at least the bathtub seemed clean. Still, I had the urge to keep my boots on while I was in there to avoid any open skin touching anything.

So after a very uncomfortable shower and actually toweling off with my shirt that I had just removed, I ran a comb through my sopping wet hair and exited the bathroom.

Dean had torn off the top blanket on the bed and was sitting on top of the sheets with his feet propped up and the remote control in his hand when I returned.

"So how is it?" He asked, flicking absently through the channels.

"Um," I stuffed my now wet shirt in my duffel. "Well, the water's wet, Dean. So I suppose that's all that matters, hm?"

"Yeah," He cringed again and flicked off the TV. "Sorry about the crappy room. If I'd have known it was gonna be so nasty I woulda kept on drivin' to the next town."

I refused to remove my socks as I padded across the floor and examined the sheets, thankfully they weren't stained and didn't smell.

"So, what's the plan for tomorrow?" I asked. "Obviously questioning the victims family is in order, correct?"

"For starters," He jumped up and moved to the miniature refrigerator and grabbed a beer. "Then we'll take a trip to the morgue and examine the body, make sure it really is vamps we're dealin' with."

He tossed me a beer which I had little interest in but cracked open anyhow. "And if it is vampires, what do you do next?"

He took a few long pulls of his beer before answering. "Well then we gotta track down where their nest is... Or, actually, first we need to figure out if there even is a nest or if it's just some lone vamp that's attacking people."

"And if there's a nest, how do you go about locating it?"

"_Carefully_," He emphasized. "They're pretty crafty and can usually catch wind when a hunter's after em. So, we gotta be careful at who we question. But, when it comes to vamps and their nests they usually stick to the country, maybe in an old farm house or barn on an abandoned strip of property."

I took a few sips of my beer, cringing afterwards. "All right, and most generally, how many vampires are in a nest?"

He shrugged at that before sitting at the table and making himself comfortable. "Varies I guess. They don't usually have over ten or twenty in a nest cause obviously big groups gather unwanted attention. The last couple me and Sammy took care of-" He paused at the mention of his brother, but then shook it off. "There was probably eight in total in the last one, so... If we're careful we should be able to get in and outa there without getting our asses handed to us."

"Yes, well-" I joined him at the table. "I have to admit that I don't fancy the thought of being bitten by a vampire, Dean. Are you sure just the two of us will be able to handle this?"

"Why wouldn't we?"

I shrugged and let out a sigh. "Well, I'm still in training as you've claimed on multiple occasions, and I would hate for my lack of skill to be the reason something happened to you."

He smiled at that and passed me yet another wink. "Don't worry, you're gonna be fine out there. I trust you."

Oh well that was lovely and all but I didn't necessarily trust myself. Not when it came to hunting creatures such as vampires, something that I had never encountered before. He had given me the gist of how to kill them, it was simple enough... Beheading... But in my opinion that was positively mortifying. The thought of severing someones head... It gave me the willies and I didn't think I would ever adjust to it. But, if it meant saving someones life, in particular... Dean's... Well, I suppose I would have to set aside feeling squeamish.

A few moments later there was a knock at the door and Dean jumped up and took a quick peak out the peephole.

"Pizza's here." He announced, then yanked the door open.

"That'll be sixteen even." The young man outside said, then peaked over Dean's shoulder and stared directly at me.

Dean noticed where his eyes went and I saw his shoulders go stiff.

"Keep your eyes to yourself there, pal-" He said, then threw a twenty at him. "Keep the change."

He then promptly slammed the door in his face after snatching the pizza box from his hands, then stomped over and plopped it down on the table.

"Pervert." He muttered and I tried not to giggle to myself. "So I got a pizza with everything. That okay?"

"Yes that's fine, Dean-" I nodded. "I'm starving so anything would taste wonderful right about now."

He flipped the box open and handed me a slice which was piping hot, then took a seat with his own and immediately took a large bite.

"Had half a mind to pound that guys face in," He said with his cheek bulging. "Had a staring problem."

"Did he?" I replied, with my own mouth full. I suppose Dean's poor manners were rubbing off on me. "I didn't notice."

"Oh please," He grumbled. "The dude was eye humping you like crazy, Laney."

I frowned at that. "Well it's not as though I asked to be "eye humped", Dean. There's really no reason for you to get upset over it anyhow."

He shrugged and took another slice after inhaling his first piece. "Yeah well... It's not like I think you'd take off with some other guy or something, but yeah... You're sweet and innocent and you need to be protected from pervs like that."

It had been a while since Dean actually made me blush, but I could say that right about then my face was burning red.

"Well as nice as that is, I don't see why you think you need to protect me, or why you're so fired up from this as a matter of fact."

He froze with his cheek bulging before swallowing the bite with barely chewing, afterwards he fumbled awkwardly before letting out a quiet chuckle.

"Well... You're my girl, so... Kinda comes with the job, Laney." He replied.

My eyes widened after that as I froze with my own cheek bulging...

I was... His girl? His girl? Did that mean what I think it meant? Yes I know that Dean and I had gotten close over the months, I had kissed him more times than I could count and I definitely admitted to being in love with him. But... Even after everything that happened he never said the same thing to me, and he never led me to believe that what we had could be considered a relationship. Or, maybe he had hinted at it and I was just too stupid to realize it. But, I just didn't want to go and assume something and then wind up being completely wrong and making myself look like a bloody idiot.

"And yeah I know, it's stupid of me to get jealous over something dumb like a guy lookin' at you, but like I said... You're not like most girls, you're sweet and innocent, and I don't want you to have to deal with crap like that-" He added. "So you're just gonna have to put up with me being protective, sorry."

I swallowed my bite and washed down the rest with a sip of beer before muttering. "All right, I won't argue with that, Dean."

He gave a crooked smile before knocking his knuckles against the pizza box. "Eat up, cause we gotta hit the hay pretty soon."

After eating another slice I was in bed before Dean since he decided to take a shower himself. Once he was finished a good fifteen minutes later, I had the lights off and was snuggled up under the covers. He was perfectly silent as he tiptoed over to the bed and climbed in his side, I suppose he thought I was already asleep.

Once he settled down and made himself comfortable, I opened my eyes and tried to see him through the darkness.

"Goodnight." I said quietly.

Even in the dark I noticed him smile faintly. "Night, Laney."

But he didn't close his eyes and neither did I, and we only laid there silent as the darkness smothered us. His eyes were locked on the ceiling, and he had one arm propped under his head. I could tell instantly that his mind was racing... He was thinking about his brother, probably worrying about him. Who knows, he had probably been doing that every night since Sam left and pretending during the day that he was fine and dandy.

"Dean..." I said, propping myself up on my elbow. "Are you all right?"

He let out a long slow sigh. "Yeah I'm okay."

"Are you certain? Because... If you need to talk at all-"

"I'm good, Laney. Don't worry about me."

Now I sighed as I inched my way closer. "Dean, I would like to think that I've been with you long enough for us to be honest with each other. And I know that you're not handling Sam being away as well as you're trying to portray... So please just talk to me, I want to help."

He moved his eyes over to mine and shrugged. "That's the thing... Sammy being gone... It's not bothering me as much as I thought it would."

Even in darkness I squinted at him. "It's not?"

"No... I don't know why... I don't know if it's him drinkin' demon blood, his lying... I don't know, but it's kind of a relief I guess him not bein' here."

"A relief? Dean you can't mean that."

"I do. I feel guilty for sayin' it but I do. My whole life it's been me and him, me chasing after him, me pullin' him outa the fire and trying to stop him from doing something stupid. Driving around with you for the last week, it's been more fun than I've had in years, Laney. And the stress... It's gone for the most part." He sat up now and I followed, moving to sit on my knees. "It's just I've been so tied down to my family I've never gotten to experience what it might be like to just be on my own... Or... Ya know, being with you just the two of us." He shrugged again, eying me closely. "So yeah it's been nice."

I felt myself frown after that. "Dean, are you sure that... That this is such a good idea? Because I know that if something happened to Sam then you would never forgive yourself."

"Nothing's gonna happen to him," He replied. "He's out. He's not hunting anymore, which is something he's been wanting since the beginning."

Why couldn't I believe any of that? No matter how his tone said he wasn't lying, his eyes gave it away. He did miss his brother, and he was worried about him. Why he wouldn't admit that... I have no idea.

"C'mon," He said, reaching over and playfully pinching my cheek. "Why do you got that look on your face, huh?"

"I'm just worried about you." I answered.

He scooted closer and pushed my eyes up to meet his. "You don't need to worry about me, Laney. Really... I'm fine."

To prove that I suppose, he leaned over and kissed me, and really it didn't take long to escalate into something that I couldn't even explain. Or, maybe I could explain it and just couldn't find the words. I wasn't experienced at much of anything, especially what men and women do together when they cared about each other... Or, even when they didn't care about each other I noticed in this day and age. I was a virgin, the most I had ever done was kiss Dean, but going by the way he was touching me and kissing me right then... I could tell that he was wanting something more. Just as that night in the Impala when Castiel caught us.

I was in a bliss filled daze and didn't even realize that we weren't sitting up any longer until he moved on top of me.

My breath caught in my throat when I felt his hand inch slowly up my shirt and grope my left breast. But once he noticed my reaction he snapped his hand back and sat up quickly.

"Fuck," He muttered. "Shit, fuck. I'm sorry, Laney."

I laid there for a few good seconds trying to catch my breath, then sat up as well. "Why are you sorry?"

He took his head in his hands and groaned. "Ugh, because... Here I was just sayin' that I didn't book this room on purpose and not to think anything of it, and two seconds in bed with you and I'm already trying to... Jeez, just... Sorry."

I shook my head and was still confused. "I'm not a child, Dean... You don't have to apologize for anything."

"Yeah I do... Cause you're not ready for somethin' like that."

Ugh, not him too. Castiel seemed to feel that I was this helpless and innocent little girl that didn't know left from right, and didn't seem to understand what I might have been feeling.

"Well I think I should be the judge of that, don't you?"

He pulled his face from his hands and gaped at me. "No, not really. Cause I saw how you reacted to me touching you, you freaked out. So, that tells me you're not ready for that yet."

I snickered at that. "Dean, you need to stop thinking of me as some delicate little porcelain doll, because that's not what I am. Yes, I will admit that I'm not at all experienced in anything, but like I said I'm also not a child. So I'm fully capable of deciding on whether or not I'm ready for something more than just a kiss." I took his hand and gave it a squeeze. "You've been so busy convincing yourself and anyone else that I'm an innocent and delicate flower that needs protected, when that's not true. The last person you need to protect me from is _you_, Dean; because I don't need to be protected from you."

He swallowed. "I don't want you to think that that's all I want from you or something though, and... You've had your old man saying shit about my past, and Jo and who the fuck knows who else. I don't want you to think I'm just trying to fuck you and that's it."

Sighing, I inched closer. "How long have I been traveling with you? How many opportunities have you had to get me into bed and yet you haven't done it? If all you wanted from me was just sex, then you would have tried to get it a long time ago."

"Okay, fine... I'll give you that. But, why'd you freak out like that when I-" He pointed to my chest and then averted his eyes to the ceiling. "When I touched you."

"It took me by surprise is all. Believe me it wasn't because I wasn't enjoying it."

He sat up straight now. "So... You're sayin' that if I hadn't of stopped what was happening just now... We could've..."

"Yes, Dean-" I interrupted. "That's definitely what I was hoping for anyhow."

He huffed out a deep breath before snickering. "Well shit... Nothin' like killing the mood, huh?"

I halfway giggled before leaning over and kissing his cheek. "Goodnight, Dean."

I laid back down with my back facing him and tried my best not to burst out laughing.

He only sat there for several long seconds before laying down again as well, only now he kept his arm draped over me.

"Ya know," He said, breaking through the silence. "You, uh... You mean a lot to me, Laney."

I smiled and let out a sigh. "You mean a lot to me too, Dean."

"I'm serious," His arm tightened around me. "It's like... It's like you showed up in my life right when I needed you to."

"Well, considering I helped pull you out of your grave, I should think so." I replied.

He snorted out a laugh now and kissed the back of my head. "I'll make a smart ass outa you yet. But no... I really mean that. If you weren't here... I don't know what I'd be doin' with myself. You somehow seem to make things better, even though they're pretty damn crappy right now."

I grabbed his hand, pulling his arm around me farther as I laced my fingers with his.

"Even though I know it's not something you're going to say, and really I don't expect you to... I still want you to know that I love you."

He was silent after that, much like I figured he would be, and the only response I got was his grip tightening on my hand.

"Get some sleep, Laney." He said now, and kissed the side of my neck.

There was no way I expected Dean to say those words back to me. I knew how he was by now, and how something like that made him uncomfortable. Honestly, him telling me that I meant a lot to him was enough... As long as I knew he cared somehow... That was enough for me.

* * *

><p>The next morning we were dressed and out the door before seven, because we had quite a lot of work to do if we were going to locate the vampires whereabouts. Our first stop was as Dean commented the night before, the victims family.<p>

Really, we didn't learn much of anything from them. They were elderly, the man was blind and confined to a wheelchair, and the wife didn't have much information to give other than her middle aged son who still lived at home, liked to drink and would stay out until all hours of the night. They were under the impression that it was an animal that had attacked him, and I suppose in a way he was.

But since we didn't gather much from the elderly couple our next stop was the morgue. And I have to admit that this wasn't exactly something that I fancied, going into a place that was full of dead bodies.

Dean barely lifted the sheet and took a peak under it, then watched as the medical examiner left the room and us in private. After he was gone did he yank the sheet off completely and I felt myself cringe.

The man laying on the slab was probably fifty years old or better, large and hefty, and there was a large gaping wound in his throat.

"Ouch," Dean said, leaning over to get a closer look. "More than a little love bite with this one."

I nodded. "So, was it a vampire that killed him, Dean?"

"Good question," His brows pressed together as he grabbed a nearby lamp and rolled it closer. "Yeah I don't know about that... It doesn't look like vamps work."

"Then... Another creature?"

He tilted his head slightly, inching as close as possible while shining the light on the wound.

"This... Doesn't seem to be much of anything actually, Laney-" He stood up straight. "Looks like he got mauled by a dog or somethin'."

"Really?" I leaned over closer now. "Are you certain?"

"Yeah, trust me when you've been doin' this as long as I have you can tell the difference between a dog bite and a vamps." He grabbed a folder on a nearby table. "Autopsy reports say it was a pit bull, and... There's been a couple people attacked in the last week by a stray dog. I'm gonna have to say we made the trip for nothing."

I sat up and fastened my jacket. "Well, at least we can take solace in the fact that vampires aren't here killing people."

"Yeah, guess so-" He tossed the folder back on the table. "Well, no sense sticking around here anymore. Let's get going."

I followed him from the morgue and back to the Impala in the parking lot. Before climbing in the drivers seat Dean froze and rested his arms on the roof of the car.

"So... Since we made the trip for nothin' and we don't have anything else to do today... You wanna do something?" He asked.

"Excuse me?" I replied. "Do something?"

"Yeah, date number two, maybe?"

I chuckled and nodded. "All right, if you insist."

"Okay, awesome. We'll just head back to the motel and change outa these suits, I can take a quick shower cause standing next to that dead guy..." He shuddered. "I feel like I got somethin' on me."

We started back for the motel and once there Dean didn't hesitate to tear off his suit jacket and tie and lock himself in the bathroom. And, I waited until I heard the shower crank on before I pulled my phone from my pocket and dialed Sam's number.

It had been a week since we heard from him, and if Dean was too stubborn to call and check on his brother then I was going to do it. I was right the night before when I claimed if something happened to Sam then Dean would never forgive himself. I couldn't let that happen.

After a few rings he finally picked up and I immediately felt the knots in my stomach untwist.

"Hey, Laney-" He said. "Listen I can't really talk right now, so-"

"I just wanted to see how you're doing, Sam." I interrupted. "I can't talk right now either, but... I just wanted to be sure you're all right."

He sighed and I heard the clanking of dishes in the background. "I'm okay... Got a job at a bar, so... I'm doing okay considering."

"So, you're not hunting?"

"No, it's too risky for me to do that anymore. I needed to quit, so... Yeah, I'm working at a bar and staying at the motel here in town. I'm doing okay, I really am." He paused and I could practically hear the gears turning in his head. "How's Dean?"

"He's fine, Sam. We were working what we thought was a job, but as it turns out it wasn't anything. So..."

"Well, uh... Yeah, I gotta go cause I'm on my shift right now, Laney... Thanks for calling, I'll talk to you later."

After he hung up on me I sat there for a good minute still holding the phone to my ear with an obvious frown on my face. Out of everyone, I knew I was probably going to be the last person on earth he'd confide in, but it would have been nice if he would have just spoken to me a little bit.

I changed out of my FBI clothes now and threw on my usual outfit that consisted of my denim trousers, a long sleeve t-shirt and my boots. It was funny, every now and then I actually missed wearing dresses.

When Dean finished with his shower and emerged from the bathroom with his hair sopping wet and changed into his previous outfit he motioned towards the door.

"Ready when you are." He said, after cramming his feet into his boots.

After locking up the motel room and jumping back in the Impala, he hesitated firing up the engine.

"Is there anything in particular you'd wanna do, Laney?" He asked.

"Um," I shrugged. "Well I don't really know what people do on dates... What would you suggest?"

He thought that over for a minute before sighing. "This town's small, so it's not like we could go to a movie or something. And there's not much else to do here either."

"It doesn't have to be anything extravagant. Just going to eat something would be enough for me, Dean."

He nodded at that and finally started the car. "Well we'll figure it out as we go. We got all day."

And as it turns out the first place we did stop off at was a bar where Dean could get a cheeseburger. I didn't complain, because I think I fancied them just as much as he did. But it didn't take me long to realize that Dean was distracted. First clues of that was how he barely touched his food or the beer in front of him. At first I suspected something being wrong, until I realized that he just wouldn't stop staring at me. And it wasn't like in the past, there wasn't a playful gleam to his eyes, nor was there his usual adorable smirk that he carried. It took me a while to figure out what that look might have meant, and then it finally dawned on me that it was the same look he had in his eyes the night before when we almost...

After that realization my face flushed red and hot, and there wasn't a chance of me finishing my meal. In truth I couldn't stop reliving the night before, and what could have happened had Dean not pulled away. Things would have been so much different the morning after, and I wouldn't know what to consider our relationship after that. To me, in my opinion anyhow, doing something as intimate as that with someone was almost symbolic in a way. I know that I'm probably alone in that way of thinking, considering there were people in this day and age that would go out and sleep with dozens of people they didn't care about. Dean for instance, I knew he had been with a slew of women before I came around, so... Who knows, maybe sex wasn't so mystifying and sentimental to him as it was to me. But had it happened between us... It would have meant more to me than just the physical pleasure gained.

"Laney," Dean cut through my thoughts. "You wanna get outa here?"

I nearly swallowed my own tongue after he asked that, as my eyes slightly widened. "And... Go where?"

He eyed me up and down before pulling his bottom lip between his teeth. "Back to the motel, maybe?"

Already my legs had turned to mush and I just barely managed to nod yes before he scooted out of the booth and quickly threw down some money to pay for our food. When I managed to stand as well he took hold of my hand and pulled me towards the door.

I was in a daze the entire drive back to the motel, and still when we pulled to a stop outside our room. And, when I finally started to break of it Dean had just gotten the door unlocked and pulled me inside, and didn't hesitate to kiss me. Just as the night before it escalated quickly, until I felt him scoop me up and we both fell back onto the bed.

I suppose I could admit that I was a little nervous... Or... Quite a bit nervous, considering I had never done this before. And Dean must have sensed that, because he didn't overwhelm me and took it slow, making sure to ask me several times over if I was certain I wanted to do it. And I over and over again said yes that I was certain.

And, passing over the raunchy details because I'm just not one for raunchy details... It happened. Once, and then another hour later one more time. And it was... Incredible. Really, there aren't words to describe how it was, I would fail a million times over at even attempting it. All I knew was that I was right when I thought that it would mean more to me than just the physical pleasure gained. It was so much more than that. And as I struggled to stay awake afterwards, I examined Dean's face over and over again noticing the peace and calm etched across his features. His breathing was steady, or at least steadier than it had been, and his eyes were locked on the ceiling.

He had his arm around me, and his fingers were lightly grazing over my shoulder which was only making me want to sleep more, but I wouldn't allow myself to drift off.

"You're staring again," He said quietly, then snickered. "Just what're you lookin' at, huh?"

"I don't know," I answered, then laid my head on his chest. "I don't even realize I'm doing it."

"You look pretty tired there, sweetheart... Looks like I wore you out."

I chuckled. "Maybe a little."

Yet again I glanced up at him, resting my chin on his chest and watched as the playful look faded from his eyes again.

"So, uh-" He cleared his throat. "Yeah you don't regret what happened do you?"

"What?" I replied, sitting up on my elbow. "Of course I don't, Dean. Why? Do you?"

"God no," He huffed out half a laugh. "Been wanting that to happen for months now. Was driving me crazy actually, but I have to say it was worth the wait. It's just since it was your first time and all, I wanted to be sure you're okay and don't regret it."

I leaned over and gave him a quick kiss. "You're sweet for worrying about me. But you should know by now that I would never regret anything you and I could do together."

"Good," He reached up and brushed my bed messed hair from my forehead. "So, uh... What you said last night... Did you really mean it?"

My brow arched at that. "Well you need to be more specific, Dean... What did I say last night?"

Of course I already knew, I just wanted to hear him say it and see the nervous look in his eyes.

"You know," He went on, not disappointing me at all when his eyes went shifty. "What you said last night before we went to sleep."

"Hm," I pretended to think it over. "Oh, do you mean when I said that I loved you?"

He was silent for a moment before giving a little nod. "Yeah, maybe... So, did you mean it?"

I kept my chin resting on his chest, staring up at him with my brows raised. "Dean, I never would have said it if I didn't mean it. Why? Did it upset you?"

"What? No, god no... No way," He swallowed hard. "I... I'm not upset at all about it." He swallowed again. "It's just... You know that, uh... That kinda thing... It's always been, I dunno, weird I guess... For me, and... Yeah I'm really glad you said it cause I... Ya know."

He was still incredibly awkward and I stifled back the urge to giggle. "Mhm. You know, Dean, I don't expect anything from you. I don't expect you to say anything, or to get so fumbled over it. Although I can say you're rather adorable when you get fumbled like that."

His lips pursed now, as he locked his eyes on the ceiling. "Right. Well, yeah... I just don't want you to think that I'm some cold unfeeling robot or something. Cause I'm not. And, like I said last night... You mean a lot to me, Laney. You really do." He moved his eyes back to mine. "You believe me, don't you?"

"I believe you." I replied. "Your actions prove that."

"Good... Yeah, that's good." He sighed, trying to relax from that conversation before rolling over and kissing me.

And... Before I knew it... _It _was happening all over again.

Not long after that we managed to fall asleep, at least for a good hour or so before Dean's phone on the nightstand started to obnoxiously ring.

He grumbled and groaned as he reached over and grabbed it, taking a look at the ID before answering.

"Yeah?" He garbled, and it would have been obvious to whoever was on the other end that he had been sleeping. "Cas, shit... I was sleeping, what'd you want?" I cracked open one eye and watched Dean rub his forehead and I could faintly hear my father chattering over the other end. "What? We're at the Riverside motel in Saint Louis Missouri, but you can't come now-" His voice was slightly panicked now and for good reason. We were currently lying naked together and if my father showed up... "We're sleeping. We had a long drive last night and we're tired, so just give it a few hours okay?" Yet again I heard Castiel chattering. "Yeah, Laney's fine, she's asleep in her own room right now. Just, give us a few more hours and then call back."

And he hung up and tossed his phone back on the nightstand, grumbling some more as he rolled over and threw his arm over me.

"Your dad says hi." He mumbled into the back of my neck.

I snickered. "I hope he doesn't decide to come anyhow, because if he does..."

"He'll rip my dick off, I know." Dean interrupted.

Well I hoped he wouldn't go to those extremes... But, it was a given that Castiel would do something negative if he found out about this. Or, maybe I would be wrong? Maybe he would have learned by now that Dean wasn't just taking advantage of me and there was genuine feelings there? At least... I think there was. He knew I loved him since I told him, he claimed to care about me and said I meant a lot to him... But was that love? Who knows...

I found that I quickly forced those thoughts out of my mind. It was depressing and I was so happy right then that I didn't want anything to ruin it.

Dean cared about me... That's all that mattered right now.


	6. Chapter 6

_**These next couple chapters are obviously gonna be from Dean's POV. I had fun writing this one, since it's one of my favorite episodes :)**_

* * *

><p>Dean's phone buzzing woke him up a second time, and thankfully since he put the phone on silent, Laney didn't wake up with him. With a groan, he passed her a quick glance, noticing her still sleeping comfortably laying beside him. For a second he couldn't help but flinch a small smile.<p>

Before answering his phone he leaned up on his elbow and kissed her forehead, and still she didn't budge. She was exhausted and knocked out cold.

Grabbing the phone now he flicked it open and said quietly. "Cas, I told you I need to sleep."

"Dean." Came Sam's voice from the other end. "It's me."

Dean sat up now, shifting under the covers and hoping it wouldn't wake Laney.

"Oh..." He replied. "Yeah, guess I didn't think you'd call, man."

"I wasn't going to." Sam sighed. "But, something happened. And I realized that you needed to know, and we need to figure out what we're gonna do about it."

Dean rubbed his forehead, trying to force himself to stay awake. "Okay, what happened?"

"Lucifer happened." Sam replied quickly. "He's been coming to me in my dreams, Dean."

"What?" Now Dean was fully alert. "Are you kidding me, why?"

"Uh, apparently because I'm supposed to be his vessel. He's been trying to get me to say yes, which of course I haven't been doing." Sam sighed yet again. "Listen, Dean... I don't think it's a good idea if we stay apart now. Not after learning about this."

Dean's eyes closed, his head falling back onto the headboard with a dull thud. "Just when you think you're out, Sammy, they just keep pullin' you back in, huh?"

"Yeah." Sam paused for a few long seconds. "So... I think we should meet up, we need to get back together and figure out what we're gonna do. I think it's obvious that I can't sit out anymore. Yeah, it's only been a week, but-"

"No, Sam." Dean interrupted. "I don't think that's a good idea. When we're together... We can't focus on the job. We're always too busy worrying about each other that we neglect everything that should have all our attention, and right now... Somethin' like that is just too dangerous, man."

Another long pause from Sam. "Dean, think about it... Both of us, we're supposed to be vessels, and that means that we can't just ignore this and-"

"We're not ignoring it." Dean interrupted again. "You do your own thing and I'll do mine. But as far as working together... It's not gonna work anymore."

"Dean, don't do this, you know that it's a mistake and-"

"Bye, Sam." Dean finished, then quickly hung up.

He tossed his phone back on the nightstand and yet again clenched his eyes shut tightly.

Naturally his brotherly instincts were working overtime right about then, and everything inside of him was screaming to call Sam back and tell him never mind. But, he couldn't... Because even though the thought of Sam out there on his own scared him to death, he knew he was right... If they were together all it would lead to was more disagreements, more fights and punches and screaming at each other.

Dean slipped down under the blankets again, scooting closer to Laney who still hadn't budged. As far as he was concerned, that was the end of that conversation. Maybe someday in the future, after all this apocalypse crap was over and done with, he and Sam could reconcile and work together again. But, for right now... They were better off apart.

* * *

><p>He slept like a damn rock, and up until a few moments ago was warm and comfortable under the blankets. But, for some weird reason the room suddenly turned frigid and cold, the blankets weren't doing much of anything anymore, the bed springs were poking up into his back and legs to the point he felt like a human pincushion.<p>

Dean groaned at that, rolling over and hoping to find a new comfortable spot, not to mention hoping to steal a little of Laney's body heat.

But he couldn't find her... He scooted closer, feeling her side the bed just as icy cold as everything else which finally made his eyes open.

Now he jumped up like a snake had bitten him, because this room was not the room he had fallen asleep in the night before.

Or... Maybe it was... After a quick glance around what was left of the room, and seeing the tattered remains of a mattress, faded flower bedspreads and dingy white sheets... He realized it _was_ the room he'd fallen asleep in just... In really really bad shape.

"What the hell..." He muttered to himself, wondering when he was going to wake up from this weird ass dream. "Laney?"

He got no response, nothing but the eerie dead silence and a whoosh of cold breeze that blew in through the busted windows.

How the room was in such bad shape, he had no idea. But he was halfway convinced that a bomb had gone off in the place. The walls were full of holes, there were burnt charred marks everywhere, and the furniture was all in pieces. Oh and of course, Laney wasn't anywhere in sight and neither was any of their belongings from the night before.

It dawned on him after that, when he didn't wake up, that somehow this actually wasn't a dream. It was real... Now he quickly darted for what was left of the bathroom door which was barely hanging off its hinges and pushed it open, hoping that maybe somehow Laney would be in there. But, of course she wasn't, because that would be too easy and when was his life ever friggin' easy?

"Fuck." He muttered, pinching the bridge of his nose.

Since he woke up fully clothed, which was a vast contrast to how he'd fallen asleep, he checked his pocket and found his phone. But naturally there was absolutely no signal and didn't seem to be acquiring one anytime soon.

Freaking out sounded reasonable but he couldn't, he knew that wasn't going to solve anything right then. First and foremost he needed to figure out where the hell he was, what happened, and where Sam and Laney happened to be.

So, he moved across the rubble in the room and to the already open door and peaked out at the parking lot.

His blood ran cold at the view past the parking lot and motel... Seeing the town nothing much but for a smoking crater. The entire town for as far as the eye could see was destroyed. Burnt out vehicles, collapsed buildings and just... Nothing but awful. It was like a scene from every post apocalyptic movie ever created and Dean halfway wanted to slap himself, to force himself awake already.

Something like this wasn't possible. Something like this was... It had to be the work of someone much more powerful then himself. Chances were good it was angels work, which meant that if an angel had thrown him into this would be zombie apocalypse then they could throw him right back to his own world. It wouldn't have surprised him any to know that Zachariah was responsible for this. After all, it wouldn't be the first time he had sent him to an alternate reality. He did it once before, sending him, Sam and Laney to some fictional land where he was a business man and Laney was his fiance. It wasn't just for sheer entertainment alone that Zachariah sent him there. There was also supposed to be a lesson learned as well.

It was safe to assume there was supposed to be another lesson learned here with this one too. What it was yet, he wasn't sure. But, he wasn't going to stick around that motel any longer. Instead he was going on the move, and hoped to come across whatever it was that he was supposed to find. Maybe it would help him to get home faster.

It took a good half hour of wandering the streets before he came across a vehicle that wasn't completely destroyed. After finding an old pick up, he hot wired it and started through town.

Thankfully it was only a two hour drive to Sioux Falls, and even though he didn't figure Bobby's place would be in any better condition than the town he woke up in, it was still worth a shot at checking it out. Getting through town however proved to be a damn difficult task with all the debris and crap blocking the streets.

When he spotted movement off to the side of the road and towards a shadowed alley, he slowed the truck to a stop. For a split second he thought he saw a person, a man to be exact, dart behind a dumpster a good fifteen feet from the street. Immediately he cranked the car in park, left the engine running, and jumped out jogging the distance to the dumpster.

Naturally he checked his pockets for a weapon of some kind, but whoever decided to drop him in Apocalypt-O land didn't bother to send his pistol with him. Still, he inched his way closer before spotting someone crouched down by the dumpster with their arms over their head. Whoever he was, he was thin and straggly, his clothes dirt stained and tattered, and he was shaking.

"Hey," Dean said, minding his tone. "Dude, you okay over there?"

The man said nothing and just continued to shake.

"Guy," Dean continued, taking another step forward. "Are you hurt? Can you tell me what happened here? I, uh... Kind of don't know how the city got blown up like this, crazy I know, but-"

His words cut off when the man gurgled and the shaking stopped.

Obviously something was seriously fucked up with this situation, and the instincts Dean had always fell back on seemed to be kicking into overdrive right then.

Turn around and run... That was what his mind was screaming at him over and over. Just turn around and fucking run. But for some odd reason he didn't run, and only stood there frozen like a statue. Even after the guy stopped gurgling and slowly rose to his feet, Dean couldn't move. And... When the guys eyes met his, and Dean saw just how red and messed up they were it finally dawned on him just what he was looking at.

This man had the Croatoan virus... And those suspicions were confirmed all the more when Dean flicked his eyes to the end of the alley and saw that very word spray painted in bold red print on the brick wall.

CROATOAN.

"Shit..." Dean muttered, then slowly started to inch his way backwards.

He knew he should have just kept on driving, and at the very least when he realized he wasn't armed he should have turned around and left the alley. But, no... He didn't, and now...

The man lunged at him, screeching and swiping at him with a jagged piece of metal he'd grabbed from the ground. Dean just narrowly missed it, falling backwards slightly into the wall before regaining his footing and darting back for the truck. He was never so thankful to hear the engine still running as he dove back inside and slammed the door.

A half a second later he cranked the truck into drive and laid on the gas as tires squalled and smoked and he swerved his way away from the alley.

The man had ran up on him before that and clung to the side of his door, scratching and clawing at the window trying to get in. Before long two more people came running from out of no where and dove at the truck. One landed on the hood and scurried his way up to the windshield, the other was in the truck bed prying at the back window.

"Shit, shit!" Dean shrieked, then took a sharp left turn.

The man clinging to his door was flung off after that, rolling across the asphalt until slamming into a burnt out car. The one in the truck bed though started ramming his elbow into the glass before it started to shatter while the last guy on the hood was struggling to hold on.

Dean flew into the nearest partially empty parking lot he could find and started spinning the truck into doughnuts. The man on the hood thankfully flew off next and was run over with a disgusting crunch and splatter once Dean made another wide circle with the truck. The last one in the bed however was a little more difficult to get rid of.

Thinking fast he threw on his seat belt, snapping it with a click, then revved up the truck and sped straight towards a telephone pole across the lot. After clamping his eyes shut he braced for impact and with a horrible crash the front end of the truck was completely smashed in and they slammed to an abrupt halt.

Dean didn't even realize his head had smacked into the steering wheel leaving a gash bleeding down his face until he wobbly reached up and wiped it away.

The guy in the bed had been launched forward after the truck struck the pole, and was now twisted around it to the point his spine was a literal pretzel.

"Fuck..." He breathed out, then slumped in his seat.

The engine was smoking in the truck now, which meant he was going to be on foot until he found another vehicle that would run. And unfortunately giving himself the time to recuperate from the head injury wasn't possible, so with a groan he pushed the door open and practically fell out into the parking lot.

For the moment everything around him was quiet now, there didn't seem to be any other virus infected freaks near by. So, he knew at least he could start walking and not have to run for his life. With how dizzy and disoriented he was from hitting his head though, he wasn't sure if he could run very well at all.

He wandered around the town for a good hour before finding a small Honda that was in working order, hot wired it too, and then took off for Sioux Falls.

Only a few hours into this crazy destroyed world and he was ready to call it quits, and he had half a mind to start screaming for some angel to get their asses down there and zap him back home or he was gonna start throwing punches.

"Better take care of that head." A voice said from beside him.

Dean nearly swerved off the damn road when he heard Zachariah speak, and had also had to stifle back the urge to shove his fist in his face.

"What the fuck!" He shouted. "It's about damn time! What the hell is all this?!"

"Calm down, Dean." Zachariah replied, sneering just like he always did. "What do you think this is? Take a good look around, see what's become of the world? This... Is your future... The entire worlds future as a matter of fact. Not a pretty picture, is it?"

Dean scowled. "What're you talkin' about? The future?"

"Yep," Zachariah chirped. "2014, five years after Lucifer broke out. Five years after you refused your destiny, Dean. Because you refused Michael, because you walked away from your true path, this is what the world's become."

"Yeah," Dean snorted. "Yeah all this happened because of me. Nice try, asshole."

"Oh believe me, it is your fault. Because you're so stubborn and bullheaded, because you wouldn't let Michael in, because you wouldn't fight that battle the world's in the toilet. Try to place the blame on someone else, go ahead and try... But you're better off just looking in a mirror, boy. Because all of this... Is on _you_."

Swallowing back what he really wanted to say, Dean's grip tightened on the steering wheel.

"So, how long am I gonna be here, huh? You're trying to teach me a lesson so, how long?"

"A few days." Zachariah replied. "We want you to marinate a bit. Really let you get the feel for what the future's going to become."

Dean jerked his eyes over to him, ready to cuss him out some more only to see that the asshole had gone and disappeared on him.

"Figures... Dick." He grumbled, then stepped on the gas.

An hour later he rolled into what was left of Sioux Falls, and another thirty minutes from that he came across also, what was left of Bobby's property.

"Jesus..." He muttered, rolling to a stop in the driveway.

The house was still still standing for the most part, although it looked a few gusts of wind away from being leveled completely. The junkyard was smoking, the vehicles there had been burnt to just charred shells, and even though the property was never a paradise in the past it looked a million times worse now. And... Also just looking at it he knew there was no way in hell Bobby could still be there.

Still he pulled the car to a stop and climbed out, and as he passed the front porch steps noticed an old rusted crowbar laying in the weeds. He quickly grabbed that, because there was no way of knowing if anymore psychos could be inside.

The way he figured it, if there was any clues or evidence on where Sammy and Laney were, then it would be there at Bobby's, so he didn't hesitate to move inside and get to searching.

The house was just awful, almost completely gutted, the walls stripped right down to the studs. All of Bobby's old books were ripped apart and strewn about haphazardly, signs of animals running rampant inside the place was evident as well.

The first place Dean moved to was the fireplace mantel behind Bobby's old desk, and the secret compartment there where Bobby always kept a pistol and a box of ammunition. Thankfully it was still there, and he felt a little better about actually carrying something other than a crowbar.

Next, he started sifting through the rubbish and piles of crap, eventually coming across an old cigar box that was held closed with a piece of tape. After tearing it open he noticed it full of black and white photos. Most were from the past, before the world went to crap. Things like pictures of cars and other things around the property. He was about to toss the box away when he noticed another picture that made his movements freeze.

Quickly he snatched it up, dropping the box to the floor as he gaped at it in confusion.

It was a group of men, two who happened to be Bobby and Castiel. Bobby, in the photo, was still in his wheelchair and Castiel... Dean could only gape at him with his brows raised.

He looked... Different. Human, almost. If he wasn't convinced the dude had been an angel in the past then he would say that he definitely _was _human in that picture. He was holding an AK-47, was dressed in dirty jeans a t-shirt and jacket.

Sam and Laney though, they were no where to be seen in the picture. And after sifting through the rest of the box and not finding anymore, Dean let out a sigh.

At least he had a sense of where to go though, because in the picture with Castiel and Bobby was a sign in the background. For a Camp Chitaqua. Hopefully they would still be there.

As he was preparing to leave he passed by the kitchen and felt his feet stop.

"Oh no..."

He tried to pretend he didn't see it... That Bobby's wheelchair wasn't laying there on its side littered with bullet holes, but... He couldn't unsee it.

After seeing that he quickly left the house and darted back for the car. Over and over again he had to remind himself that this wasn't really the future. Or, well maybe it was, but back in his own time this hadn't happened yet. And as far as he was concerned, it never would.

So, maybe Bobby was gone here in 2014, but that didn't mean that Sam and Laney were.

* * *

><p>Dean knew better than to drive up onto the property of that campground. The most that would give him would probably be a slew of bullets because chances were good that people in this time would be twitchy and trigger happy. So, he parked the Honda nearly half a mile from the campgrounds entrance and trekked the rest of the way on foot. It wasn't that difficult to stay out of sight, with a thick dense forest surrounding the property he had a feeling they had people sneaking up on them a dozen times a day.<p>

And once he reached the outskirts of the campground the first thing he noticed was a tall chain link fence encircling the property. Definitely something the survivors must have put up because he highly doubted a campground would be fitted with a fence like that. Considering it was wound with razor wire it was safe to assume they'd stolen it from a nearby prison.

He inched closer carefully, staying low in the bushes as he peaked through and noticed several men he didn't know move on past on patrol. All were armed with not only semi automatics, but machetes and pistols in their belts too. There were watchtowers stationed at every corner and scattered around were small cabins along with armored up vehicles.

Voices carried over the air, but from his position he couldn't make out what was being said. But, he had to guess just by how many there were, there had to be a good forty to fifty people in this encampment.

It was just after sunset now, and getting darker by the second as he spotted a slight gap in the fence to his right, and after making sure no one spotted him he darted out and squeezed his way through.

Maneuvering through the camp wasn't too difficult, all he had to do was stick to behind the cabins and vehicles. And for the most part he was keeping himself calm. That is... Until he spotted something familiar in the distance.

"Oh shit..." He muttered, then darted out from behind a particular cabin and moved over to what was left of the Impala.

It was completely gutted, the doors missing, the tires missing... The windshield was busted and it was essentially a rust bucket now.

"Oh god..." He bent down and examined it closely. "I think I'm gonna be sick."

No sooner had he thought that did he hear footsteps charge up from behind him. He barely had the chance to turn around before he felt a hard whack on the back of his head and he thumped to the ground in a heap.

In and out of consciousness he felt himself being dragged across the ground, and eventually up a set of stairs before a faint light somehow pierced through the haze.

Wherever he was reeked of cigarette smoke, booze and gunpowder, and as he struggled to keep his eyes open he felt his wrist being shackled down to something.

He blacked out after that for he wasn't sure how long and only jolted awake once he felt a cold splash of water thrown in his face.

"Ugh," He groaned, his eyes finally parting and locking onto the ceiling of a cabin. "What the hell?"

"That was my question."

Dean sat up quickly after that, fully prepared to admit that he was totally tripping out or hallucinating because the voice he just heard sounded an awful lot like...

When he sat up though and his eyes locked onto himself... He struggled to remember just how much he drank before he fell asleep.

"Oh holy crap." Dean muttered. "This is way past my pay grade."

Why he didn't bother to consider that he might actually run into the future version of himself, he had no idea. But, it should have been obvious.

And now... There he sat... Staring back at him with a frown creasing his face, one that past Dean was sure he'd given Sam a million times if he was pissed.

He couldn't help but notice though that the future version of himself was... Well, there was a very harsh and weathered look to him. His eyes were dull, his features worn and tired and just... Disturbing... Disturbing and surprisingly chilling.

"So," His future self said. "I was just sittin' here trying to figure out who the hell you are, and where you came from. Cause, uh... Kinda hard to miss the resemblance here, pal."

Dean nodded. "Yeah well, guess the reason for that is because I'm you. And thanks for hitting me in the head by the way, you just killed your own braincells."

"You're me?" Future self replied. "Right, and how exactly did that happen?"

And Dean responded simply with, "Zachariah."

That definitely caught his future self's attention as he sat up straight from the table he leaned against.

"Zachariah?" He questioned.

Dean nodded. "Yeah, the dick thought he'd zap me here, I don't know... I guess he's trying to teach me a lesson or something."

"What happened?" Future self continued. "What year did you come from?"

"2009, was sleeping and yeah... Woke up in what was left of the motel I'd fallen asleep in the night before."

He moved to stand. "Call him down here. Pray or scream or whatever it is you gotta do, but get Zachariah back down here now!"

"Dude I can't," Dean snapped back. "He's not gonna come, like I said he shipped me here to teach me a lesson and he ain't gonna come back til I've learned it."

"Oh yeah and I know just what lesson he's trying to teach you too. Take a good look around, notice anything different about the future?"

Dean sat back, ignoring that question as he motioned to the cuffs. "This really necessary?"

"Yeah," Future Dean stomped across the cabin. "Can't have you running around camp scaring the shit outa people because-"

"Where's Sam?" Dean interrupted. "And Laney and Cas? They're still around, right? They're alive?"

"Alana and Cas are here, yeah." Future Dean answered.

"And Sam?" Dean didn't seem to notice how his future self had called Laney "Alana".

At the mention of Sam however, his future self went noticeably stiff. "Yeah, uh... There was a big show down in Detroit five years back. And, so I heard... Sam didn't make it."

Dean was suddenly hating this fucked up future even more now. "You weren't with him? You weren't lookin' after him?"

"No," Future self shook his head. "No, Sam and me kinda lost touch a while back. Not long after Lucifer got let out and everything just went to crap. He went his own way, I went mine, and yeah... That was the end of it."

Swallowing hard, Dean tried to ignore the twisting in his stomach. "Well anyways... I'm here for a few days according to Zach, so... Why don't you uncuff me and maybe we can work something out? I mean, the asshole sent me here to learn a lesson and I can't exactly do that if I'm tied up in your cabin, dude."

His future self shook his head at that, moving across the cabin and stopping at the door.

"No, you're not goin' anywhere. Not til I know I can trust you. Believe me, I know your every move, so... Just stay there and keep quiet. I gotta make a supply run and won't be back for a few hours."

"A few hours!" Dean bellowed. "Dude I'm not sitting here like this for hours, what if I have to pee, huh? What then?"

"Go in your pants." Future self replied blankly. "Just shut the fuck up and don't cause me any problems. We'll talk more when I get back."

He stormed out of the cabin now, slamming the door behind him and Dean sat back and bumped his head on the wall.

"Asshole." He muttered.

After he was gone, and after hours went by that he didn't come back, Dean started picking and prying trying to get himself out of the cuffs somehow. To his luck he pried loose a nail from the floorboards and managed to pick the lock until it snapped open and he sprung back to his feet.

He knew it was going to be risky moving around the campsite without being spotted, but he had to at least find Laney and Cas and talk to them. Since his future self was such a dick and didn't offer much information, then maybe they would.

So he took a peak out the window, noticing that he'd been locked down all damn night and the sky was starting to brighten with sunrise; so he slipped outside and down the steps.

Thankfully there wasn't anyone out and about just yet. Not for the first five minutes of his wandering anyhow.

In a way he was kind of surprised that Laney didn't share a cabin with his future self. It would make sense if she did anyways, and if she didn't then at least she should have been camping near him. Chances were good she was bunking with her old man, and still he figured that cabin would be close to his but... After peaking in the windows and seeing perfect strangers he had no choice but to change his mind about that.

He continued to wander around the campsite, dodging people he didn't know, until he felt his feet skid to a stop at seeing a very welcome and familiar face.

"Thank god." He muttered, stomping across the gravel and making a beeline straight for Laney.

Halfway there however he paused, taken aback momentarily because she didn't... She didn't look like herself.

Not only was she rail thin, but her hair... Was gone. Hacked off to jaw length, and she was pale and looked just plain exhausted.

He tried to shake that off as he moved closer. She seemed to be working with a few other women at a makeshift cooking station as they started to prepare their camps breakfast. How she managed that, he didn't know, because she looked nearly ready to topple over.

"Laney!" He said, jogging the rest of the way and making her freeze where she stood.

Once he came to a stop in front of her he couldn't help but smile slightly, then reached up and flicked at her hair.

"When did you do that, huh?" He asked, halfway chuckling.

She glared up at him with her eyes narrowed. "When did I do what?"

"Cut your hair," He replied. "Kinda took me by surprise, almost didn't recognize you, Laney."

Flinching at that, she shook her head. "Is this some kind of joke, Dean? Are you drunk again?"

"Oh... Oh no, I'm not drunk, yeah I kinda forgot where I was for a second. So, uh... Do you think we can talk?"

"Dean." She stopped what she was doing, slamming down a frying pan on her work station. "We agreed. We don't speak to each other unless it pertains to missions or work around the camp. So, unless that's what this is about... Go away. I have work to do."

Dean froze after that, completely unprepared for a response like that.

"Uh," He cleared his throat uncomfortably. "Are you okay, Laney?"

Her glare returned, in fact it seemed her eyes very well might have shot fire out at him.

"_Stop _calling me that." She snapped. "You know I hate it when you do that, it's just plain cruel."

She turned away and started working again, apparently through with the conversation. Dean had no choice but to walk away, trying to figure out what the hell just happened and why Laney had been so damn hostile. It definitely wasn't like her.

The twisting in his gut only intensified after that and he was more than ready for Zachariah to send him home now. For some odd reason the Laney of the future hated him, that was completely obvious. Now the question remained was why did she hate him?

He swallowed down that question though, at least for the moment as he started wandering around the camp again. Eventually he spotted yet another familiar face, and just as Laney had... He almost didn't recognize him.

Castiel was disheveled and unkempt, his hair a disaster and the shirt he wore was at least two sizes too big. Thrown over it was a dirty jacket which Castiel was searching the pockets of. After a few seconds he pulled out a lighter and didn't hesitate to light up a cigarette and take a seat on the stairs of a cabin.

"Jeez," Dean groaned, rubbing his forehead. "I don't think I can take anymore surprises today."

Still, he moved his way over to Castiel now, hoping that he wouldn't respond as negatively and harshly to his presence as Laney had.

"Morning, Dean." Castiel said, not bothering to look at him as he puffed away at his cigarette.

"Uh, yeah," Dean paused, running a hand down his face anxiously. "Okay, seriously, someone's gotta talk to me here. Someone that's not gonna beat my head in or... Or scare me with a frying pan."

Castiel chuckled. "Let me guess... You made the mistake of bothering Alana at her work station? When are you going to learn, Dean, you can't do that anymore."

"What the hell's going on around here, Cas?" Dean returned. "I need some answers here. I mean, first I wake up here and the world's gone to shit, and... Then I find this place and it's just... What the fuck's going on?"

Castiel peered up at him after that with his brows furrowed, flicking his cigarette in a nearby puddle.

"What are you talking about? Are you drunk again?"

"No!" Dean felt like ripping his hair out. "No, why does everyone keep fucking asking me that?"

"Because it's a rare occurrence when you're actually sober, Dean." Castiel moved to stand. "So it's safe to assume that when you're wandering around ranting and raving that you've been-" He stopped now, then eyed Dean up and down. "Wait a minute. You're not you... Not _now _you, anyways?"

"No!" Dean groaned. "Fucking finally, no... I'm not _now _me."

Dean noticed now just how bloodshot Castiel's eyes were, and the smell of not only cigarettes, but pot and booze smacked him in the face.

"Interesting," Castiel nodded. "Was it Zachariah that sent you here?"

"Yeah, chucked me here from my bed."

"Interesting." He repeated.

"Yeah, fucking fascinating," Dean shook his head. "Look, I don't know what the hell kinda lesson I'm supposed to be learning here. Unless of course it's seeing how shittastic the world is now."

"Obviously this is Zachariah's way of trying to motivate you into saying yes to Michael." Castiel replied, then started walking. "Although I don't think you're actually going to do that, even after this."

"Well, yeah whatever, wait a second-" Dean grabbed Cas by the jacket sleeve and forced him to stop. "I talked to Laney a second ago, and she-"

"You better not call her that to her face, Dean." Castiel interrupted. "She'll probably shove her fist in your mouth."

Dean's face fell flat. "Yeah, I kinda got that just now. What the hell happened, man? Why does she hate me so much?"

Castiel sighed. "That's not for me to say. If you want to know... You'll either have to ask her, or... The other you."

He started walking again and Dean stuck close, even though he could sense that this Castiel didn't like him much either.

"So, uh-" Dean cleared his throat. "What's with the smoking and drinking and stuff, Cas?"

"What?" Castiel replied.

"Don't play dumb. What's with the smoking and shit? And, well... Not to offend or anything, but you look like shit for being an angel."

Castiel chuckled again, coming to a stop beside a random vehicle which he leaned against.

"Dean I'm not an angel anymore," He said. "My grace is gone... Been gone for a long time now."

"What?" Dean's arms fell at his sides. "How?"

"After the battle started the other angels left, and when they left I was cut off from heaven. After a while my grace just dwindled away little by little, and now-" He threw up his arms. "I'm pretty much human, just like the rest of you."

"And Laney?"

"Same goes for her." Castiel turned, staring past the vehicles and to the work station that Laney was still standing at. "As much as I hated it... It happened. It means she's not protected any longer, she's vulnerable. So... I've got my work cut out for me with trying to keep her safe."

Dean followed his gazes as they watched Laney for a few long seconds.

"That don't exactly explain the smoking though, Cas?" Dean went on.

"Yeah well," Castiel shrugged. "You do whatever you can to block out everything that happens in the world now a days. Sometimes that requires drinking, sometimes it requires other methods... Stronger more mind numbing methods."

Dean tried to ignore that. Tried to void out just how disturbing it was knowing that a former angel was basically a drunk and a pot head.

Turning away, Dean stared past the chain link fence and to the forest surrounding. Anytime now, he thought. Zachariah could send him back any damn time now!

The silence was broken by raised voices, and turning back Dean noticed it was his future self at the food station, and he was obviously arguing with Laney about something.

"Here we go again." Castiel sighed, then pushed away from the vehicle. "Might as well come with me, Dean. Maybe this will be another lesson to learn while being here."

Dean didn't even want to know what Cas meant by that. But he followed him anyhow as Castiel picked up his pace and rushed across the campsite and to the food station, coming to a stop at Laney's side.

When Dean came to a stop just a few feet from them, instantly Laney did a double take.

"God dammit." His future self groaned after spotting him too. "Well... Awesome, fucking perfect. You just couldn't stay put, could you!"

"What... In the world is going on?" Laney breathed out, her face an even paler shade of white.

"Just... Stay out of it. Mind your own business." Future self snapped.

"Hey!" Dean stomped closer. "Dude, what the hell? Don't talk to her like that."

"Alana, come with me." Castiel said, taking hold of her wrist. "I'll explain."

Castiel shot future Dean a cold hard stare before moving past the work station with a completely bewildered Laney behind him.

"What the fuck was that?" Dean asked after they were gone. "Since when do you, we, or... I... Treat Laney like shit, huh?"

His future self's response was grabbing him and dragging him back to his cabin and up the stairs, giving him a hard shove through the door and then slamming it behind them.

"What I do out there isn't any of your damn business!" He snapped back. "This ain't your time, it's mine!"

"Oh," Dean snorted. "Yeah, so sorry, man. Didn't mean to come crashing into the future and fucking up your paradise here... Seriously... What was that? I know you... I _am _you, dammit. So I know that what I saw out there wasn't me."

His future self moved over to a bottle of Jack Daniels on the table and poured two shots.

"Well, she hates me... So, I guess it's kinda hard not to lose my cool sometimes, okay?" He replied.

Dean moved to the table and grabbed the second shot, downing it in half a second.

"So," Dean went on, cringing as it burnt all the way down. "Why does she hate us so much, huh? What the hell did you do to fuck things up? Cause, in my time, things were pretty damn good."

His future self cringed at that, averting his eyes to anything in the cabin that wasn't his damn clone.

"I fucked up," He replied. "I fucked up and now she hates me."

"You fucked up how?" Dean went on, laying his empty glass down, awaiting an answer. And, once he saw how his future self refused to make eye contact, how he shifted on his feet and fell silent, it hit him like a brick to the face. "Oh, come on... You didn't? Really? You cheated on her?"

Future self shrugged, trying to play it off as nothing. "Yeah, like I said... I fucked up."

Dean turned away and paced back and forth. "Why? What the hell made you do something so damn stupid? She was perfect."

"I know," Future self swallowed hard. "But, shit happened... Crap went down, all the shit with Sam, and then the friggin' apocalypse, and... I don't know. I guess I just wasn't thinking. Or... I don't know, maybe I just didn't care anymore. But, yeah, it happened and that's that."

"That's that?" Dean turned back to face him. "So, you bang some other girl and-"

"It was more than once." Future self interrupted. "More than one girl, more than one time."

Dean froze. "Jesus... What the hell's wrong with you?"

"Thought I could get away with it I guess," His future self replied. "And I did for a while. Then, more crap happened... Laney got pregnant, she lost the baby and-"

"Whoa whoa whoa!" Dean stomped forward now. "Pregnant? Laney got pregnant?"

"Three years ago, yeah," Future self nodded. "But, she caught me with some chick and flipped out, took off and got in an accident and lost the baby. So, yeah. She hates me now. I don't blame her, I deserve it."

"Damn right you deserve it." Dean shoved him backwards into the table. "I can't fucking believe this! What the hell's wrong with you?!"

His future self sighed, rolling his eyes. "Look, that shit don't matter. What matters is what you can do about fixing all of this. Take a look around, the world's in the toilet, there's croat's running all over the place, humanity's pretty much fucking dead. So, what you're gonna do once Zach decides to ship you back to 2009, is you're gonna call down Michael and you're gonna say yes. You're gonna say yes and keep all of this shit from happening."

Dean took a step back. "Why the hell didn't you just do that yourself by now?"

"I tried! Believe me, I've tried. I've screamed, I've prayed for hours, until I couldn't speak anymore, but they just don't care. The angels aren't listening, Michael's gone and he ain't answering... But that doesn't mean that you can't go back and do what I didn't. You can stop all of this from happening, Dean... All of it. So I'm begging you, please please... Go home and say yes to Michael." He studied his expression and then shook his head. "But I know already that you're not gonna do it. Cause you're gonna be stupid enough to think that you can find some other way, and believe me... There ain't no other way. So, I guess you should get used to what the future's gonna be like, _Dean_, because this is what's in store for you."

Dean moved across the room and flopped down on a random chair, if it wasn't such a disturbing thought he had half a notion to put a bullet in his future self's head. If not only for getting his little brother killed, but for causing Laney to miscarry his own kid and then just completely fucking her over.

How in the hell had he let himself get that bad, he wondered. He just didn't think it was possible.

"Anyways," His future self went on, changing the subject and returning to that asshole attitude. "You wanna know what I was doin' out there last night? That mission I went on?"

Dean pulled his face from his hands. "Oh sure, why the hell not?"

Seconds later his future self pulled something from inside his jacket, thumping it down on the table in front of him.

Dean moved to stand, staring down at the colt... The colt that they had used to kill yellow eyes... The cold that Bela had stolen...

"Shit," Dean said, running a hand down his face. "Where'd you find it?"

"Wasn't easy," Future Dean replied. "Took five damn years to track it down, but... We finally managed it. The demons were movin' it from one place to the next, but yeah... Now we finally got it."

"And?" Dean shrugged. "What're you gonna do?"

"What do you think we're gonna do? We're gonna go out there and kill the devil, that's what."

Dean only stared at the colt laying there with his stomach twisting even more...

Yeah... Zachariah could definitely ship his ass home now! He was ready to get off this damn roller coaster ride!


	7. Chapter 7

This whole back to the future crap Dean had had enough of five minutes in. Now, twenty four hours later and he saw just how fucked up everything was... How cold and just plain horrible his future self was to Laney... Sammy was dead... Bobby... And who the hell knows what else; he was officially ready for Zachariah to send him back. Not that he wasn't ready for that five minutes in to all this mess.

He didn't want to know what was going to happen next. He was done. Just done. But there he sat in the corner observing this debriefing, or whatever his future self had chosen to call it, scowling and shifting uncomfortably.

If it wasn't bad enough that two of the most important people in his lives were dead, but the other was alive and well... Or not _well _exactly, but she was alive and hated him.

Laney was sitting at the table with Castiel, his future self and a few other people from their camp looking over maps and discussing plans on killing Lucifer. He could tell she was uncomfortable and wanted to get out of there. She refused to make eye contact with his future self, refused to acknowledge him when he asked a question and would only respond if Castiel repeated the same question. Still... Despite that he couldn't help but notice she kept making subtle attempts at passing _himself_ a glance when she thought he wasn't looking.

Dean was still having difficulty not putting a bullet in his future self's head. How in the hell he managed to get this bad he couldn't figure out. Yeah sure, he'd been through some horrible shit, but his entire life was nothing but shit so the way his future self acted, the way he treated Laney, everything was just... Uncalled for.

"Scouts pinpointed Lucifer in this area right here," Future Dean said, breaking the silence. "So, that's where we'll go."

Castiel leaned forward and glanced over the area on the map. "Oh yes. Brilliant, Dean, it's right in the middle of a hot zone."

"Yeah?" Future Dean shrugged. "So?"

"So," Castiel huffed. "Are you saying that we simply charge in there guns blazing in attempts to killing the devil and that somehow his army won't notice us there?"

"You got any other ideas?" Future Dean returned.

Castiel sighed at that, sitting back and kicking his feet on top of the table. "Unfortunately, no. But I would advise we come up with something that isn't going to get all of us killed."

"It's gotta be done. There ain't no other way of ganking that s.o.b. Either we go in there and die trying, or we sit back and do nothing and he destroys what's left of the planet."

Dean cleared his throat from the back of the room. "So, just how'd you find out where Lucifer's holed up anyways?"

"I said," His future self answered. "Scouts."

"And I call bullshit." Dean jumped down from his spot and waltzed over to the table. "Because you seem to forget that I'm you, dude. So I kinda know all your tells, and I know you're lying. So really, how'd you find out where he's hiding?"

Future Dean glared at him while an awkward silence befell the table.

"One of Lucifer's guys, that's how-" He finally said. "He spilled the info after I worked him over... Happy?"

Laney visibly tensed after that, her eyes falling to the table and refusing to budge and Dean felt his eyes widen.

"Wait a second... Torture? Oh, awesome, yeah. So we're torturing again, huh?" Dean replied.

Castiel halfway chuckled at that which of course made future Dean scowl at him.

"What?" Castiel questioned. "I can't help it if past you is much more likable than you are."

"I think we're getting off the subject here," A woman named Risa chimed in. "If we're gonna attempt this at all then we need to come up with something that's not full of holes."

"I got something lined up." Future Dean nodded. "Everyone's just gonna follow my lead when we head out tomorrow."

"Oh of course," Laney finally spoke and her tone was laced with venom. "Yes because that certainly has worked in our favor all of those other times. Tell me, Dean, how many men have we lost when we simply follow your lead out there, eh? How was it that Bobby died, or Ellen and Jo, hm? Answer me that?"

Future Dean paused and seemed to count to ten. "That wasn't my fault."

"Bollocks it wasn't your fault," She shook her head. "That's always your so called _plan_. Follow your lead, and when we do you always fuck up somehow and it always leads to someone dying."

Dean actually flinched at hearing Laney curse like that.

"Just... Stop it." Future Dean pinched the bridge of his nose. "If you don't wanna come I'm not making you, Alana. By all means, stay behind. You'd probably slow us all down anyways."

Castiel jumped to his feet now and gave him a shove.

"Stop talking to her that way. I'm sick of it, Dean. You remember that promise I made you three years ago? Don't think that I won't keep it."

Dean's future self only sneered. "Right. Yeah, if you think you can actually get that done, then go ahead and try, Cas. You're not an angel anymore. You're just a regular guy that bleeds and gets broken bones just like the rest of us. You can't just smite anyone you want anymore."

"Perhaps not... But bullets are just as effective." Castiel finished, then reached down and latched onto Laney's hand. "We're leaving and we'll be ready to ride out in the morning."

She didn't argue in the slightest and allowed Castiel to pull her out of the cabin. Not long after the other two camp members were gone and Dean passed his future self a glance and a head shake.

"Guess it's safe to say that you've got all your old friends and loved ones hating you, man." He said.

Future Dean moved across the room and to his bottle of Jack. "What can I say... I'm good at that."

"So Cas threatened to kill you, huh?" Dean went on. "Just a wild guess, but I'm thinkin' it had to do with how you fucked Laney over."

"Yeah," Future Dean snorted. "He's her old man, guess he thinks it's his job or something."

"Course it's his job!" Dean spat back. "I'd expect nothin' less after everything you did!"

"Go ahead and lecture all you want. But remember, like you said earlier, you're me... Which means that everything I did, you're gonna do eventually. You'll fuck up just like I did and-"

"Like hell I will!" Dean interrupted. "I don't know what the fuck went on that made you do everything you did, but there ain't no way I'm gonna make the same mistakes."

He stormed out of the cabin next, ignoring the slow drizzle that was coming down from dark black clouds and started off across the camp. If he didn't leave right then and there, then he was sure he was gonna grab the nearest thing he could find and bash that fuckers head in.

Lightning streaked across the sky now, followed by a loud crack of thunder that jarred his insides. By the time he managed to find Castiel's and Laney's cabin the rain was coming down in buckets and he was soaked to the skin. Still he didn't stop as he bounded up the stairs and pounded his fist on the door.

Seconds later the door swung open and Castiel glared out at him.

"What do you want, Dean?" He asked.

"Sorry," He said, trying to calm down some. "I, uh... Wanted to know if I could talk to Laney."

"No," Castiel replied quickly. "That's not a good idea. You need to leave."

"Hell, I would if I could," Dean swallowed hard. "Please? I'm not gonna cause any trouble or anything, I swear. I just... I need to talk to her, okay?"

Castiel shifted on his feet before taking a glance back into the cabin. "It's not my decision to make. It's hers. If she wants to talk to you, then fine. Wait here."

After he slammed the door in his face Dean took a few steps away and stared down at the river of water that was sliding down off the roof of the porch. A shiver raced through him as he breathed into his hands for warmth, and what felt like minutes passed before the door creaked open again and Laney warily stepped out.

"Hey," He said, trying to give some kind of smile but all he felt was misery. "Sorry if I'm bugging you or something, but-"

"What do you want, Dean?" She cut him off, her tone just as cold.

His posture slumped after that, and he leaned against the railing trying to find the right words to say.

"I just..." He cleared his throat. "I don't know exactly what all went on between you and me. The other me, ya know, he told me some things but there was probably some he left out." He paused and stared her up and down. "I just wanted to tell you that whenever I get sent back to my own time, that all that shit I did to hurt you so badly... I swear to god that I'm not gonna do that again, Laney. I honestly don't know what could've made me do it in the first place. Cause you and me, it was good I thought. Hell it was the only thing good I had going for me back in my time. And you might not believe me, but you were the only girl I've ever cared for like that."

She shivered under her thin jacket and leaned against the door, pulling it around her tightly.

"You're right," She replied, keeping her eyes on her feet. "I don't believe you. Trust me, Dean, I've heard all of that before. Dozens of times."

Dean frowned at that, giving a slight nod. "That don't surprise me none. But I mean it. I really do. God, I don't know how I could have fucked up everything like I did. You were the one and only person that I swore on my life that I'd never hurt again. I know I said some stupid things in the past, but we worked our way past it and... Things got better. Hell, I thought it was pretty damn perfect actually."

"It was only a lie, Dean." She said. "In the beginning, when things seemed to be so perfect it was just a lie. And the reason why I know that is because if you care for someone, if you love someone, then the actions you did would have never even crossed your mind... So, that's very telling, and I know now that you're just not capable of loving anyone. Not in the way you should."

He swallowed back a knot in his throat. "That's not true..." He paused, forcing the next words out even though it scared him to death. "I love you."

Her arms dropped to her sides as she gaped at him. "Those words don't mean anything to me anymore, Dean. Do you think I haven't heard you spout that rubbish a million times over the last five years? After every time you would sleep with someone else and I found out, or you did something else cruel and horrible and you would throw out those words like they were some sort of get out of jail free card? I fell for them before... Several times because I was foolish and genuinely thought you meant it. But... All of those horrible things just kept on happening. You kept on doing it and the last time... That was the _last _time. I'm not going to be a fool anymore."

Rubbing his forehead, he found he couldn't pull his eyes from the porch floor. "God... What the hell did I do to you?"

"You killed our daughter, Dean!" She spat back. "Mary Elizabeth, you killed her!"

Now Dean finally shot his eyes back to hers. "What?"

"You heard me," She sobbed. "Our daughter. She was a sweet and beautiful little girl and you killed her, and I will never forgive you for that!"

"Wait a minute," He stood tall. "He said that you... That it was a miscarriage? The kid wasn't even born yet?"

She shook her head, averting her watery gazes to the camp surrounding. "Yes I suppose he would say that, wouldn't he? But, it wasn't a miscarriage. She was two years old, just a baby, and because of your actions, your drunken outbursts, our daughter was killed."

Dean couldn't force out anymore words after that and could only stand there with his face pale white. When the door opened again and Castiel stepped out he took hold of Laney's arm and pulled her inside.

"That's enough," He said. "You're done, Dean."

Laney rushed back inside and slammed the door behind her, leaving Castiel and Dean on the porch alone.

"Jesus Christ," Dean finally managed to squeak out. "What the hell did I do..."

Castiel said nothing and only stared at him.

"How?" Dean asked now. "How did she die?"

Sighing sadly, Castiel shook his head. "Alana caught you with a woman, you fought and she threatened to take Elizabeth away from you. You were drunk and stormed out with the baby and sped off. You crashed into a telephone pole... She died instantly." Now he reached into his pocket and pulled out an old torn up black and white photo, holding it up in front of his face. "That was your daughter. My grandchild. And you took her away from all of us."

Dean didn't even want to look at that picture, because already he was trying not to cry. Still, he passed it a quick glance and felt his heart shatter a little more. She was beautiful, was a perfect cross between Laney and himself. She couldn't have been over a year old in the picture, and had probably just learned how to walk as she held onto a stuffed rabbit and grinned right at the camera.

He choked back a sob and shook his head, and was relieved when Castiel stuffed the picture back in his pocket.

It's not like he ever planned on having kids, it's not even like he wanted kids necessarily. But just knowing that him and Laney actually had a daughter and then because of his own actions she died... Stabbing himself in the heart he was convinced would hurt less than this.

"No," He said now, stomping towards the stairs. "This isn't gonna happen again. I'm not gonna let it."

He ran at a full sprint back to his future selfs cabin and burst through the door. He was sitting at the table with a full shot in hand and Dean didn't give him the chance to say anything before he lunged at him and they collided to the floor. Over and over again he shoved his fist in his face, to the point that all he saw was red. And he didn't stop until his future self was completely out cold. By the time Dean could barely raise his hand anymore and finally fell away, he'd made a mess out of his future self's face. He knew he busted his nose, and who the hell knows what else.

"You got off easy you son of a bitch." Dean muttered, then fell back against the table leg and tried to catch his breath.

* * *

><p>The next morning was hazy and humid, and Dean didn't say anything to his asshole future self and just waited out on the porch in the scorching hot sunlight. How the weather had changed so drastically, he had no idea, but that was the least of his concerns right then. Instead, he watched as their group for the day was getting things ready and loading up their jeeps and other vehicles with gear and ammunition.<p>

Laney and Castiel was among them of course, but Dean knew better than to try and talk to either of them again. He had to face facts... Future Laney despised him. It hurt like hell, but he kept telling himself over and over again that the mistakes he made, he wouldn't make a second time. No matter what went wrong, no matter how things turned out in his time with Lucifer and the apocalypse, he swore on his life that he was never going to hurt Laney like that. He'd rather put a bullet in his own head first.

When his future self finally decided to exit his cabin, Dean couldn't help but feel some sort of sick satisfaction at seeing how bruised and busted up his face happened to be. Like he said the night before, the bastard got off easy. He very well could have kept on going until his damn heart stopped. But he didn't... Because what would be the point? Sooner or later he was gonna be zapped back to his own time, and this horrible nightmare would be over and done with. Not to mention that he was going to make damn sure that he didn't make any mistakes. He was getting a second chance... He wasn't going to fuck it up.

He followed him down the steps and over to the group as they stopped at the head vehicle and future Dean cleared his throat.

"We all ready?" He asked.

No one could ignore the way his face was busted up, and Dean heard a few quiet whispers amongst the small crowd.

"We're ready." Castiel replied. "Everything's loaded up."

"Good." Future Dean nodded. "We'll go over everything once we get there."

Now Castiel motioned to Dean. "Should he really be going with us? If something happens to him, then-"

"He's going." Future Dean interrupted.

"Okay, fine." Castiel shrugged. "It's foolish in my opinion, but we all know you don't give a rats ass about our opinions."

Everyone turned away after that and climbed in their own vehicles.

"Cas did make a good point." Dean said now. "Is it really a good idea that I go with you on this thing?"

"Yeah." His future self replied. "You're goin' cause I want you to see something. I want you to see our brother."

Dean froze solid. "Sam? But I thought you said he died five years back?"

"No," He rolled up the map that had previously been spread out on the hood of his jeep. "Sam didn't die five years ago. He said yes to Lucifer."

"What? You've gotta be shitting me?"

Future Dean moved to the drivers side door and stopped. "Yeah well, guess I'm good at more than just making everyone hate me. I'm also good at being responsible for destroying anyone and everyone I care about. So, you're going. You're going so you can see Sam with your own two eyes and then maybe that'll be the kick in the ass you need to go back to your own time and say yes to Michael."

He said nothing more and climbed in behind the wheel. A good minute later Dean managed t snap out of the horrified daze he was in and follow suit, climbing in the passenger seat.

As far as he was concerned there was no way things could get any worse than this.

* * *

><p>When they arrived just outside the location where Lucifer was supposed to be hiding, everyone climbed out and sneaked their way closer using the cover of trees to shield them. The group immediately crouched down and did a weapons check, and Dean couldn't help but ask himself how guns were supposed to be used against what was surely a building full of demons.<p>

He took a glance at the large brick building just past a chain link fence. From what he could tell it looked to be an old hospital, or possibly an insane asylum considering there were bars on the windows. It was old and run down, definitely not what he figured someone like Lucifer would be holed up in; but he very much doubted there were any other places that were still standing.

"Here's what we're gonna do," Future Dean started. "We're gonna clear a path through the front, no stopping not even for a second, we shoot anything that moves and we keep movin' until we find him or he finds us. Everyone got that?"

Everyone nodded and didn't argue and Dean felt his brows furrow. "Uh, can I talk to you for a second?" They both moved away from the group a good distance and stopped. "Okay so what's really going on, huh?"

Future Dean shrugged. "What're you talkin' about?"

"I know you, remember? And I know there's something you're not telling everyone. So what the fuck are you really planning?"

He shook his head at that. "All right, fine. Take a look around you? Notice anything out of the ordinary? Normally this place would be crawling with demons and croats. But, there's nothing... It's quiet, so what does that tell you?"

Dean paused clenching his jaw tightly. "They cleared a path for us. Which means this is a trap. So what're you doing sending them in through the front?"

"They're the decoys," Future Dean replied. "They go in the front, distract them, and I go around the back."

Passing a glance to the group, his eyes fell onto Laney who didn't seem at all strong enough to do something like this.

"So you're saying you're sending your friends right in there to get their asses nuked?" Dean asked. "Laney and Cas too?"

"No," Future Dean shook his head. "Laney's coming with me, because despite what you might think about me or how much I fucked up, I still care about her. The others though... Yeah, they're going in without us."

"Wow," Dean snorted. "You're one cold asshole you know that? You're makin' calls that I would never make."

"Desperate times, man." His future self replied nonchalantly.

"Well how would your group feel if I went over there and shared all this with them, huh? Cause I sure as hell ain't gonna stand here and let Cas and everyone else go in there to get themselves killed."

He turned away but didn't make it two steps before he felt a hard thump on the back of his head and he hit the ground face first. Things went black after that, for... He didn't know how long. All he knew was that when he started to come to again he was alone, and there was rapid gunfire coming from inside the building.

"Shit," He groaned then wobbly pulled himself to his feet. "That stupid dick."

Still wobbly, he ran as well as possible through the trees, making it around the building until finding a gap in the fence he could slip through. Once inside he kept on running, moving past an outdoor seating area that was busted and covered in weeds, eventually rounding the building again until coming to an abrupt stop just in time to see Sam... Not Sam... Cram a knife straight into Laney's chest.

She was leaning against a broken birdbath and couldn't even choke out any sounds at all as he pulled the knife out with a bloody yank. Laying on the ground past her with a bullet hole in his forehead was his future self.

Sam... Lucifer... Finally sensed Dean standing there and turned, raising his brows and giving a cocky little smile.

"Oh," He said, dropping the knife to the ground. "Looks as though you chose the wrong moment to come say hello, Dean."

Dean couldn't move... He could only stand there with tears in his eyes as he looked at what used to be his little brother. The starch white suit was a vast contrast to what he normally wore, it stood out immensely in the gore and destruction around him. His once normal kind eyes were something fierce and frightening now that chilled Dean right down to the bone.

"I'm sorry," Lucifer spoke again. "About you having to witness this," He motioned to Laney who was slumped over. "But, poor girl... She just had to follow you here. It's funny, actually. After everything that happened she still loved you and couldn't just walk away."

He didn't know how much more he could take... Dean was just about broken down completely. Watching Laney die, and watching what used to be his baby brother do it... That was all it took to shatter whatever shield he might have had left. No matter how much he told himself this wasn't going to happen, that Zachariah would ship him back and this would be long gone... It didn't matter.

"Aren't you going to say anything, Dean?" Lucifer cocked his head to the side slightly. "I know you've got to have a lot on your mind."

Dean swallowed hard, looking past him and Laney and to his future self who was dead on the ground as well. The colt was laying next to him, just next to his hand and apparently the only shot that got off was the one that hit him in the forehead.

"Why?" Dean squeaked out now.

"Why?" Lucifer squeezed his brows together. "That's an ignorant question, isn't it? Obviously they didn't leave me much of a choice. They were going to kill me, so it had to be done." He moved away from the bodies and to a rose bush across the walkway. "Or, maybe you're asking why Sam? And, in answer to that question... It had to be him. It always had to be him."

Dean inched his way closer, biting back tears. "Is he still alive in there? Does he know what's goin' on?"

"Of course," Lucifer replied. "I take good care of him, Dean. Although," He tsked. "He is a little upset about what happened here just now. You know, it's funny... I liked her. Alana. She was like me... Misunderstood... An outcast, considered a monster and an abomination. And after everything that happened, Sam and I offered her a place here with us where she would be safe. But she wouldn't accept it. Now look at her," He glanced over his shoulder at her. "Such a shame."

"Well I bet you're just getting a big kick outa all this aren't you?" Dean spat. "You got what you wanted, you got my brother, you got to destroy the world and-"

"What?" Lucifer turned around. "Why would I want to destroy the world? This is my fathers greatest achievement, it's beautiful in so many ways. No, my issue wasn't with this planet, it was with who was populating it... Humanity... Not my cup of tea." He turned back to the rose bush, picking the dead leaves and flowers off. "In truth it didn't even have to be this way. I was willing to give humanity a chance."

"Let me guess," Dean swallowed. "If they agreed to serve or worship you?"

Lucifer chuckled. "Well, as haughty as that might make me, yes. But it wouldn't have been so bad really if you think about it. Instead of an absent God, I would actually be here. I wouldn't be hiding like my father has been. I could have made things better, but... I suppose that just wasn't meant to be. People hear my name and they cower in fear... The Devil... There just wasn't a way for me to ever be anything else but that."

"That's because you are the devil. You're evil, your cold. You stomp around with this big chip on your shoulder thinkin' you're better than everyone else when you're not. You just a monster, the exact thing that I would've hunted down and killed back in my own time. And believe me, whenever I get sent back, I'm gonna find a way to do that. You're not getting my brother, you're not gonna hurt anyone else cause I'll blow a fucking hole through your chest first."

After spitting all that out Dean went rigid, completely prepared for Lucifer to turn around and explode him on the spot. But, he didn't. He only glanced over his shoulder and smiled.

"I like you, Dean. I really do. But I think we both know that you're not going to do that. You just tried," He pointed to his dead future self. "And failed miserably. Enjoy everything while it lasts once you're sent back. But remember... All of this is destined to happen, it _will _happen. And it all begins with Detroit. I'll see you in five years. Let's hope that next meeting will go much better than this one."

And in a flash he was gone, leaving nothing behind but the people he'd just killed, and Dean finally allowed himself to crumble.

* * *

><p>The night before still felt like nothing but a dream. In fact, it took having to force myself awake and see Dean laying beside me for me to know that it had actually happened. It was the first time in, well centuries I suppose, that I had ever felt so happy. Maybe that was foolish of me, maybe I shouldn't have allowed myself to read too much into it, but... I couldn't help it. It was Dean, after all. And the man just had a way about him.<p>

I watched him sleep for a moment, noticing that it didn't seem to be very sound and going by his facial expressions I guessed he was having some sort of nightmare.

Scooting closer, I pushed myself up on my elbow and lightly shook him. "Dean. Wake up."

But he didn't, at least not yet so I shook him a little more. "Dean, you're having a nightmare, wake up."

Suddenly his eyes burst open and he sat up like being shot, gasping in deep breaths and waving his arms in the air.

"It's all right," I said, grabbing hold of his hand before he could accidentally smack me with it. "It was just a dream, Dean."

His eyes darted all around before finally settling on me. I found it strange how relieved he seemed after that.

"Thank god." He said, then grabbed me and kissed me several times over. "Get up and get dressed, Laney. We gotta get outa here."

He jumped up after that without saying anything else, scrambling around and throwing his clothes on while stuffing other things into his duffel. I watched him for a moment, obviously confused, because the way he was acting, well... It was as though he knew something horrible was about to happen.

I wrapped the sheet around me and stood now. "Dean, what's going on?"

"I'll explain in the car," He replied. "How long do you think til you're ready?"

"Well... I just need to get dressed, but-"

"Then do it. Hurry, Laney, please?"

I nodded and did as he said, throwing my clothes on as quickly as possible and packing the remainder of my belongings that were scattered about the room. I stopped to slip on my boots, yet again watching how panicked and shaken his was.

"Dean, what's wrong? You're scaring me." I said now.

He stopped what he was doing and moved over to me, grabbing my hand and pulling me up from my chair.

"It's okay, I'm sorry. I'm not trying to freak you out or something." He kissed my forehead. "You trust me right?"

"Of course I do."

"Then just know that I'm gonna take care of you, and everything's gonna be all right. But we gotta get out of here because-"

Whatever he was going to say was cut off when I spotted a figure standing behind him on the opposite side of the room. Immediately I gasped and took a step back as Dean swung around and locked eyes with Zachariah.

"What the hell are you doing here now you dick?" Dead spat.

Zachariah moved his attention to the tangled mess of bed covers, then glanced past Dean and straight at me.

"Alana, you're looking well," He said with a sneer. "Got a nice rosy glow to you."

"Hey," Dean shook his head and moved to block me from his view. "You leave her alone. I asked you a question, what're you doing here?"

Zachariah smacked his hands together. "Well I just thought that we could have a chat. After everything you just went through in the future, I figured maybe now some sense would have been smacked into you. Did you learn your lesson?"

I felt my face scrunch in confusion after that. The future? What in the world was he talking about?

"Oh yeah," Dean nodded. "I learned my lesson all right. But not the one you were tryin' to teach me."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Zachariah scowled now.

"It means that your plan backfired you idiot. You think you could zap me five years into the future and I'd see how fucked up the world was, the people I cared about dead or hating me, and then seeing Lucifer running around wearing my brother and it's gonna make me come back here and say yes? Well, you got another thing comin', pal." He moved closer and I couldn't help but stick close to him. "It's not gonna happen. You're not getting your yes, so you might as well just back off and stop trying."

Zachariah bounded across the room and moved straight into Dean's face. "Or, I could just teach you another lesson, I could pound it into you in the most bloody and painful way possible. Or, maybe I'll just do it to her," He motioned to me in the background. "Maybe that'll make you break!"

I went stiff and clung to Dean's arm, because I had no doubts that that very well might happen.

"You're not touching her again." Dean replied. "You'll have to get through me first and no way in hell am I breaking that easily!"

The atmosphere in the room turned much colder and darker after Dean said that, and Zachariah looked ready to snap.

"All I have to do is snap my fingers and she's dead, Dean," He said now. "When are you going to realize that you're mine? I got you now, and I'm not letting up until you-"

And suddenly the scene around us streaked and whooshed away, stopping abruptly with a flash as we found ourselves standing on the side of some dark country road. I turned quickly and noticed Castiel standing there with some little smile that I couldn't identify, and without saying anything I crushed him with a hug.

"Dude," Dean said, heaving out a deep breath. "You got no idea how happy I am to see you."

"Well," Castiel said, hugging me still. "We had an appointment."

"You intervened just in time." I mumbled into his shoulder. "Any later and he could have... I don't even want to know."

"I don't get how the hell he tracked us down," Dean added. "Cas? Do you know?"

Once he pulled away he nodded. "I've heard talk recently. Apparently Zacharhiah's recruited individuals out there to come into contact with him if they spot you. People like religious fanatics, street preachers. I imagine because they were the only ones that would believe an angel was speaking to them."

Dean grumbled and rubbed his forehead. "Yeah, awesome. Guess that means we gotta be even more careful out there from now on. But, on the upside, I think I might have a plan on taking Lucifer out."

Castiel squinted. "A plan? What sort of plan?"

"We'll go over that soon enough, in the mean time I gotta make a phone call." Dean replied then yanked his phone from his pocket.

I was pleasantly surprised to find out that Dean was calling his brother. And even more pleasantly surprised when they arranged a place to meet up again. We waited a good hour or more before Castiel sent us back to the motel to grab our belongings and the Impala, he stayed of course for those few moments just in case Zachariah decided to return a second time; then after that Dean and I were back on the road.

We drove for several hours and I could only sit there frozen in my seat once Dean explained that Zachariah _had _actually sent him to the future, he wasn't just exaggerating at the motel before. He had went five years into the future, saw the aftermath of Lucifer traipsing about the planet. He saw the destruction, all the death and just horrible awful things that would surely accompany the apocalypse. There were things however that I could tell Dean wasn't sharing. Details, probably very dreadful details, that he refused to speak of. I didn't question him on it because just going by the horrified look in his eyes was enough to frighten me. As far as I was concerned whatever it was that happened five years from now wasn't going to happen again. Dean was definitely adamant about that as well.

After arriving at the place we were to meet Sam, Dean parked the car and cut the engine, sitting back and letting out a deep sigh.

Wherever we were was secluded, surrounded by tall grass and weeds with a view of a bridge in the distance. It was quiet, peaceful actually, and now all we could do was wait for Sam to get there.

"You okay?" Dean asked, staring me up and down. "You know, with everything? Not just what I told you, but... With everything else that happened?"

I nodded. "Yes, I'm fine. Are you all right?"

He didn't answer right off, but he didn't have to. I could see the look in his eyes that told me he was far from all right.

"Yeah, uh," He shrugged, lowering his eyes to his lap. "I don't know, Laney. All this gettin' tossed around to alternate realities and shit... I don't think I can go through that again. This time though, it was bad. Really bad. Everything I saw there, everything that happened... That ain't never gonna go away."

I scooted across the seat and kissed his forehead. "I'm not going to ask what happened. I don't want you to have to talk about it. But just remember that now you know what _could _have happened; and now you know what you can do to prevent it."

He nodded, trying to flinch a small smile but it couldn't have been more fake. "Yeah, I know. I'll run myself into the ground if I have to to keep it all from happening."

It wasn't too difficult to imagine what he might have seen in the future. Going by his reaction to it all it was safe to assume that Sam was dead, maybe even Castiel and myself. Honestly I didn't know what else could have happened that would force Dean to act this way.

But we were silent for another thirty minutes or so and only sat there as he kept his arm around me and I rested my head on his shoulder. That seemed to make him feel better actually, at least his eyes didn't seem so sad anymore and when a car pulled up behind us he perked up even more.

"There he is." He said, then climbed out.

I followed after him quickly as Sam pulled to a stop and stepped out. He gave one of his usual little smiles, one that said completely that he was nervous or slightly apprehensive about this meeting. Still, he moved his way over to us.

"Hey," He said, awkwardly moving his hands into his jacket pocket. "I'm glad you called."

I stepped back and leaned against the hood, trying to at least seem like I couldn't hear their conversation. Whenever it came to Sam and Dean speaking with each other like this I always felt so intrusive, like I shouldn't be there.

"Yeah," Dean finally replied. "Yeah I thought that all this had gone on long enough. So, if you want back in, if you want us to work together again then there's some things we gotta agree on."

"Okay," Sam nodded. "Just name them."

"For starters there can't be anymore secrets. It's never gonna work if you and me aren't honest with each other. Which means, whatever you got going on in that mopey head of yours, you gotta tell me about it. And, I guess I can try 'n do the same thing." He paused and let out a sigh. "The fact of the matter is, is that you and me, we keep each other human. And the monsters out there, those that are comin' after us, they know that. So, there can't be anymore fights or yelling and screaming at each other, no more disagreements. We gotta both be on the same side one hundred percent or they're gonna get us, and you know that."

I passed a glance to Sam long enough to see him nod again in agreement.

"Yeah, I know. I thought that me leaving was gonna help with everything. But I know now that was stupid. Running isn't gonna solve anything. Everything that happened, it's on me and-"

"No," Dean corrected. "It's on both of us."

"I'm the one that let Lucifer out, Dean."

"And I'm the one that broke the first seal, so-" Dean shrugged. "I'm just as guilty as you are. So... We good here?"

Sam smiled again only now it was much more sincere. "Yeah, we're good."

"Right, so... Let's get goin' cause we got a lot of work to do."

They both moved to the car and was going to climb back in and Dean only stopped once he noticed I wasn't following.

"Laney?" He slammed his door again. "You okay?"

"I'm fine," I smiled back at him. "But I was thinking that maybe it might be best if I went with Castiel for a while."

"Wait what?" He stomped over to me. "You can't leave, Laney, you-"

"Yeah," Sam chimed in. "Just because I'm back it doesn't mean you have to take off."

I snickered at that. "I'm not taking off, I'm not leaving permanently. It's just, I think it would be good if you both spent some time alone together. I'm certain you still have quite a lot to talk about and you need to be alone to do it."

Dean shifted on his feet, throwing a desperate look to his brother. "C'mon, you don't have to do that. Me and Sammy are fine, and we're gonna stay fine. I need you here too."

With a sigh I leaned over and kissed him. "Dean, what you need to do is be with your brother. I told myself a million times that I wasn't going to interfere in your relationship, and you've just reconciled and there's a lot you need to discuss. Besides... I miss Castiel, and he's been alone out there for a while and he needs someone too. I'll be back, it's only going to be for a few days, maybe a week and that's all."

He wanted to argue still, I could tell, and after another glance to Sam who only shrugged, he nodded.

"Okay, well at least wait til we get somewhere we can all talk. I wanted to talk to your old man anyways, tell him what I got planned. That cool with you?"

I smiled again. "All right. That's fine."

No I wasn't too eager to run off and leave Dean and Sam alone, but I was telling the truth when I stated they needed time alone.

Besides... I really did miss my father and it might have been nice to spend some time alone with him too.


	8. Chapter 8

_**Sorry it took so long to update. I've been super busy lately!**_

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><p>It didn't take long to find a random motel for us to call down Castiel, and once he arrived Dean seemed to take his time with explaining his so called plan for taking down Lucifer.<p>

His expression was difficult to read I noticed right off. There was a certain gleam in his eyes that was harsh; but past that there was something else... It looked like regret, pain and sorrow... Whatever it was, he was experiencing that from what I guessed was his journey into the future.

Of course I wanted to know what he saw there... How exactly it was so horrible. It was frightening to think that if somehow we didn't settle the Lucifer issue then that very well might happen. Even though whatever Dean saw there was certain to be awful, I still wanted to know so I might be able to prepare myself for whatever was to come.

"So," Dean finally said. "Not gonna go into any details about what I saw exactly, cause as far as I'm concerned, all that crap ain't gonna happen-" He paused and passed me a quick pain filled glance. "But one good thing did come out of it."

"And that would be?" Castiel replied.

"Future me managed to track down the colt. Granted he didn't have much luck with it cause he got his ass killed, but... I thought that if we could track it down too, well... You know?"

"Excuse me?" I chimed in. "But what is the colt?"

"A gun," Sam answered. "A really special one. It can kill anything."

"Anything?" I retorted with my brows raised.

"Yeah," Dean nodded. "Demons, shifters, vamps... Anything."

Castiel squinted at that, then moved to stand. "Interesting. Even though I think it's foolish to even attempt to kill Lucifer, it might be worth it to at least try to locate the weapon."

"Least it'd give us some kinda option instead of standing back and letting him nuke the planet." Dean finished.

"And," I said again. "Presently you have no idea where the gun is?"

"No," Sam sighed. "It was stolen from us a while back. More then likely it's halfway around the world by now."

I stood now too. "Oh lovely, then how pray tell are we supposed to find it?"

"Yeah that's gonna be the tricky part I guess." Dean groaned. "Might mean we have to trap and interrogate some demons cause I have a feeling that they're gonna know where it is."

Castiel nodded. "It would make sense, seeing is that it's the only weapon that can actually kill Lucifer."

I didn't want to get too excited just yet. Just because there was a weapon in creation that could kill the devil didn't mean we were going to locate it. It very well could have been destroyed by now, because why would Lucifer be foolish enough to let it exist if it could kill him?

"But," Sam said now. "Just in case we can't find it, or... If it's gone... We need to have a backup plan."

"One thing at a time, Sammy." Dean replied. "For right now, let's make the colt our main focus. And, while we're doin' that if we happen to think of something else, then awesome... Means we got two ways out then."

"Technically we already do have two plans," Castiel added. "If I can find God, then-"

"Yeah, uh... Let's just say that that ain't gonna happen man." Dean frowned.

Castiel tensed up at that, as did I... I hated that I couldn't tell them that I knew where God was, that we had spoken to him... That we had visited his bloody house... How much simpler would all of this be. Although... Seeing is that he was God, he would have already known by now what was happening.

"Just because you have no faith, Dean, it doesn't mean that I don't." Castiel replied. "I believe he's out there, and I believe that I can find him."

"Ya know, I get that you got faith or whatever. But you gotta take into consideration that he knows everything that's going on already-" Dean said and I went stiff because I just thought that very thing. "And seeing is that he's not trying to put a stop to all of this means that he doesn't give a rats ass, Cas."

"Well," Castiel's jaw clenched. "I think differently, and I'm going to continue searching for him."

"Fine," Dean threw up his hands. "Go ahead and waste your time. Meanwhile, Sammy and me will just be out there lookin' for something that actually _can _kill Lucifer. So if you ever wanna take a break from the daddy search and lend us a hand, that'd be awesome."

Castiel didn't have a response to that, and I could tell he was trying to control his temper. It would have been easy for him to explode at Dean, but he didn't... Not only for my sake but because it was safe to assume that Castiel considered Dean a friend now.

"So, uh," Sam cleared his throat. "Even though this doesn't have anything to do with Lucifer or the colt, I did happen to come across a job in Colorado, Dean."

Dean tore his eyes from Castiel's and turned back to his brother. "Okay, what?"

"People going missing, only to turn up later completely shredded and mostly eaten." Sam replied. "Not sure what it could be yet, but there's six bodies so far."

"Guess that means we're takin' a drive to Colorado then." Dean finished.

"I need to get back out there," Castiel said now. "If you need anything then call me."

"Wait," I latched onto his arm as Sam and Dean grabbed their jackets. "Don't leave just yet, all right?"

Castiel nodded and I followed Sam and Dean outside to the Impala.

"You sure you wanna take off with Cas?" Dean asked. "Cause you can always change your mind."

He winked at me and I felt myself chuckle. "I'm sure, Dean. Like I said before, you need to spend some time alone with your brother, and I really do want to do the same with Castiel. I'm certain it won't be for very long though. Maybe a few days, or a week."

After a nod he moved in closer, cast a wary glance over my shoulder to make certain my father wasn't looking, then kissed me.

"Okay, you be careful out there and stay outa trouble." He kissed me again. "No unnecessary risks, all right?"

I snickered and gave him a hug. "You be careful too, Dean. Enjoy your time with your brother."

Castiel stepped out of the motel room just in time to watch Dean and Sam climb in the Impala and drive away.

"Where are they going?" He asked.

"To that job I imagine." I replied.

"But," He shifted on his feet. "Aren't you going with them?"

"Not this time," I turned to face him. "I thought I would go with you for a little while. If that's all right?"

He seemed genuinely surprised at that. "Oh... Of course that's all right. But you do realize this is going to consist of nonstop traveling from one location to another?"

I shrugged. "Yes, well... I'm quite sure I'll adjust rather quickly."

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><p>I was wrong... Traveling with Castiel nonstop from one place to the next was exhausting. And it wasn't just arriving in a new location, stopping for a while to search, and then moving onto the next, no... Instead it was zipping across the landscape and landing just enough for me to catch a quick glimpse of the scenery, then zipping off to a new area.<p>

Still... It was nice spending time alone with him. We hadn't the opportunity to do that really since I found out he was my father; and for the most part I think he was happy I was along for the journey as well. It must have gotten rather tiring and lonely constantly being by yourself with no one to converse with. It saddened me to think that perhaps Castiel believed I preferred being with Dean over him... Because I certainly didn't. In a perfect world they would both be there with me. But, for the moment this would have to do.

After the first two days of traveling however, Castiel finally seemed to sense just how exhausted I was and decided to leave me at a motel so I could get a decent nights sleep. He was reluctant to do so as a matter of fact, fearing that someone or something might discover me there alone; but after warding the room with sigils and promising him a million times over that I would call if something happened... He finally agreed to it.

"I shouldn't be gone long," He said. "I'm certain I'll return by the morning."

I nodded and took a glance out the window and to a charming little diner across the street.

"I'll be fine here." I replied. "I'll call Dean and let him know how everything's going."

"I know it's pointless to tell you to remain here in the room," He sighed now. "So I'll just say that if you do venture out, in particular to the diner across the street that I saw you eying," He paused and I snickered. "Just make sure you don't speak to anyone that might approach you, and if you sense anything unusual call me immediately, Alana... All right?"

"Of course, Castiel." I snickered again. "But I'm sure I'll be perfectly fine. This town's very small and quiet, I highly doubt there's going to be any demons or angels here."

"Still," He moved his eyes to the floor, and I could just see the apprehension on his features. "It makes me nervous to leave you alone." Now he shook his head. "Maybe I'll just stay here for the night and watch over you, that way I'll know for certain that nothing happens."

"Well that's your decision to make," I shrugged. "But I really do think that I'll be fine. I know it's probably silly of me to say, but you're going to have to trust me to take care of myself sometime."

He frowned deeply. "It's just... With everything that you've been through in your life... I can't help but be protective, Alana. I don't know if that's the way all fathers are towards their daughters, but... I am."

I moved and gave him a tight hug and kiss on the cheek. "Well I don't mind that. At least I know you care, hm?"

After an awkward little smile, he nodded. "All right. I'll make an exception this time. I'll return in the morning. Remember to keep your angel blade with you at all times, and make certain the door is locked before you go to bed."

I was expecting him to also tell me to not stay up too late as well, and to make certain I ate all my vegetables.

But he didn't, and after he vanished from the room the first thing I did was take a nice long shower. Then of course... I called Dean.

Even though it had only been two days I couldn't believe how much I missed him. And, I didn't want to toot my own horn, but I was pretty damn certain that Dean missed me as well. Yes I knew he was enjoying his alone time with his brother, but... There was a tone to his voice that told me he wanted me to come back.

He wasn't very pleased when he learned Castiel left me alone in a motel room for the night. But I assured him over and over again that everything was perfectly fine. The town was small and quiet, the walls of my room were covered in sigils, and I still had my angel blade. Things were just fine.

Who knows, maybe in a way I was also trying to convince myself of that as well. With everything that had happened since I was released from prison, then it was safe to assume I would be nervous or frightened of what might happen next; especially with the thought that the actual Devil was traipsing about free. It doesn't seem as though I had much luck now did it?

Anyhow, after speaking with Dean for a few long minutes, he had to get back to working with Sam so I decided now was as good a time as any to get a bite to eat. Traveling with my father was lovely, I enjoyed spending time with him, but it didn't leave much opportunity for three decent meals a day. So when I entered the diner a few moments later my stomach was particularly loud because I was so famished.

The place was quiet but for a seldom few gentlemen drinking coffee at the bar. Oh, and of course an interesting looking fellow in a nice black suit that was seated in a booth with a newspaper in front of him. I didn't really pay him any mind, but as I walked past him to get to my own table he glanced up from his paper long enough to offer a small smile that was almost a sneer in my opinion.

Normally I didn't pay any mind to strangers, I knew better than to do that now a days after everything that had happened. But, oddly enough I found that I actually returned a smile and nod before sitting down in the booth behind him. I don't know why exactly, it's not as though this man exuded kindness or any sort of vibe that he could have been friendly. In fact... There was a suspicious look about him, something that under different circumstances I might have been alarmed about; but I suppose I was just too hungry to give a damn this time. But maybe it was the dark suit, maybe it was the fact that he seemed far too distinguished to be sitting in a little out of the way diner in a small town in Illinois? He definitely stuck out from the other patrons who were all adorning dirty overalls and muddy work boots.

Still, I sat and a few moments later the waitress came and gave me a smile.

"Do you know what you want, hon?" She asked.

"Um," I cleared my throat and glanced over the menu. "Well, would you have any suggestions perhaps?"

She arched a brow after I said that. "What is there some kind of British invasion goin' on here today or something?"

"I beg your pardon?" I replied, confused obviously.

Now she motioned to the man seated behind me. "Two foreigners in one day, that don't happen much around these parts."

My brows rose at that as the man shifted in his seat and let out a gruff chuckle.

"Pay her no mind, love-" He said, then folded his paper neatly. "These ruffians have no sense of poetry."

The waitress, whose name tag clearly read "Cindy" was not at all amused at his comment.

"Special today is potato soup and a turkey sandwich," She spat. "Do you need a little more time?"

"Oh," I swallowed hard. "No, I, um... I'll have the special, thank you."

She stomped away now and I had a very sinking feeling that I would be finding something rather disgusting in my food thanks to the snarky gentleman behind me.

Speaking of, he stood now and tucked his folded newspaper under his arm and moved to stand beside my table.

"I apologize for that, darling-" He said. "But it seems the service here leaves much to be desired. I've been having a time with that one," He motioned to the waitress behind the bar. "Although, she did point out something interesting. It is strange that someone from my neck of the woods would be here in this town of all places." Now he motioned to the seat in front of me and I only nodded. "So, what brings you here?"

"Just stopping off for the night," I replied. "What about yourself, sir?"

He eyed me closely after that, that strange little sneer he had given me earlier returned.

"I'm just passing through on business. I'm in sales."

"Ah," I nodded, why did he seem so strange? "What sort of things do you sell?"

"Little of this, little of that," He returned. "But, my main focus isn't terribly exciting... Life insurance."

I chuckled slightly. "It seems you're doing rather well with that however. At least by the looks of you."

"I can't complain." He shrugged. "Oh, how terribly rude of me. My name's Roderick, and you are?"

He reached across the table expecting me to take his hand, which I hesitantly did.

"Alana." I answered.

"Pleasure," He smiled, then sat back. "That's a lovely name, where exactly do you hail from, darling?"

"Just outside of London, the countryside actually."

Overall he seemed like a decent enough fellow, but with my abilities cut off right along with Castiel's I wasn't exactly the best judge of character now a days. So, he could have been an evil wicked monster and I wouldn't have known the difference. Of course, there didn't seem to be any evil oozing out of him. He was mysterious, yes, and I found it odd that he was here in this town but if he really was some sort of traveling salesman then I guess it wasn't that unusual.

"So you said you're just passing through town," He said now. "Are you traveling alone?"

"No," I shook my head. "I'm with my father."

"How nice," He sneered again. "Father daughter road trip then?"

"I suppose you could call it that."

Whatever he was going to say next was interrupted by his cell phone ringing. And... For a moment I only sat there with a confused look on my face because of the unusual lyrics that started chiming through the diner.

_"I like big butts and I cannot lie."_

Definitely not what I would have expected coming from... Well, whoever this man was.

"So sorry," He said and pulled his phone from his jacket pocket. "But I'm afraid I have to cut our conversation short. It was nice meeting you, Alana. Maybe I'll see you again one day."

I said nothing in response to that, and instead offered a small smile. He slipped out of the booth shortly after, waltzing his way from the diner completely and eventually disappearing around the other side of it.

Unusual, but at least he wasn't a foaming at the mouth psychopath. Of course with having very little abilities anymore, and having no way of detecting a monster, angel or demon... Well, I couldn't very well say that man wasn't something wicked now could I?

My lunch was rather tasty, and I certainly felt much better after I'd eaten a decent meal. When I returned to the motel I flicked through the television channels for a good hour before drifting off to sleep.

* * *

><p>I woke up a little past seven and for a moment as I rolled over, I halfway expected to find Dean laying there beside me. But of course he wasn't, because he was off doing a job with his brother. Not that I should have been surprised because being alone with Castiel was my idea in the first place.<p>

Speaking of, I was surprised that Castiel hadn't returned yet, and after taking a glance at my phone I noticed he had texted me. For a moment I couldn't help but chuckle at that, because Castiel texting was just so... Well, it was almost as amusing as _myself_ texting. Texting in general was just strange to me.

Anyhow, he claimed he was going to run a little late after stumbling onto something he felt might lead him in the right direction towards God. I was hoping that one of these days the guilt I was feeling about knowing the truth about Chuck would begin to fade, especially since my father was out there potentially endangering his own life in search for someone that had no intentions of being found. Chuck was content with hiding his true identity, to the point that he was masquerading around as a prophet and publishing novels that really were nothing short of pornographic.

It was a tad bit difficult to not be angry at Chuck over all of this.

But, I shook that off, because I could either tell Castiel the truth about Chuck and then have God smite me, or... Or I could keep silent like I had been and just live with the uncomfortableness. I swore though that the moment I found out that Castiel could have been in true danger then that was it... I would tell him. And then, well... Hope that Chuck didn't punish me severely.

After running a comb through my hair and brushing my teeth, I left the motel room again and made my way for the diner from the evening before. Breakfast sounded lovely, and it was actually a pleasant morning so I made certain to sit near the window to bask in the sunshine.

I certainly was not expecting to see the strange man from the day before waltz his way into the diner again. And, I halfway had the urge to phone Castiel or Dean because... Well, you couldn't exactly say anything was a coincidence anymore, not with the life I was leading now a days.

But, I didn't call them, and instead only sat there and hoped he wouldn't find his way to my table again. Unfortunately I had no such luck.

"Good morning, Alana." He said. "Lovely morning, isn't it?"

"It is actually," I returned. "Roderick, if I remember correctly?"

"That's right." He took the liberty of sitting at my table again, this time without asking for permission. "So it seems I'm having a bit of car trouble and can't leave town just yet. Seems I'm stuck here in this backwoods country town for at least another day or so."

"I'm sorry to hear that." I cleared my throat anxiously. "My father and I should be leaving some time after breakfast."

Now he glanced around the diner, seeing it empty but for the two of us. "Oh... Is he here?"

"Well, no. He's still at the motel, but he should be here any moment."

"Ah," He eyed me up and down and I very much didn't like the look those eyes held. "Well I was just stopping off for a cup of tea, so I'll leave you alone. Have a nice trip with your father."

So that's what he did, he got a cup of tea to go and then left without another word spoken. It was uncomfortable enough the day before when he decided to have a conversation with me, but this morning... I couldn't describe what I was feeling. All I could say was that I was glad he was gone.

And after a delightful breakfast of pancakes and bacon, I left the diner feeling much better and had actually almost forgotten the strange encounter.

Since it was such a nice morning I delayed at returning to the motel, which I knew Castiel would be upset about. He didn't want me wandering around on my own, but the way I looked at it; my ribs were inscribed with sigils, I had myself an anti possession tattoo and I was carrying my angel blade, so I should have been perfectly safe. Not to mention that this town was so small, barely five hundred people so I doubted there would be any danger roaming about the streets.

So I took a little stroll, which now that I think about it was probably very stupid of me. No, it _was _very stupid of me, most definite. Because just when I think that all is well and fine, everything comes tumbling down all at once.

I had only stopped to glance in a shop window and a pretty dress that was on display there when I saw in the glasses reflection two figures looming up behind me. I swung around just in time to see ones fist come flying at my face, which thankfully I managed to duck and miss. The second one however pulled an angel blade.

"Come with us." He said. "Don't make us drag you outa here."

"Who are you?" I returned. "What do you want?"

"Shut up," The second man said. "Just start walking."

Under the circumstances I complied with that demand, because I wasn't about to start a brawl right there on Main street where some innocent bystander could be harmed.

I started walking as one man kept a firm grip on my arm. They led me away from the shop window and eventually down a side alley that was littered with garbage. Once I was certain there wasn't any onlookers I yanked my own angel blade from my jacket and swung around.

I didn't even look, I just slashed and after hearing a gurgle and feeling a spray of blood on my face I knew I'd hit one of them. Seconds after that one man fell to the ground with his throat bleeding out and the last one standing charged at me.

How bloody stupid of me to decide to take a stroll now of all times. I knew I should have listened to Castiel and stayed in the motel. But, no... Here I thought that everything would be fine and dandy simply because it was a small quiet town. I swore that if I didn't die with this altercation then I was never disobeying my father again.

But, before I even had the chance to fight the remaining attacker he suddenly yelped out in pain and I saw the end of another angel blade ram right through his chest. His skin sparked and flickered underneath which told me instantly he was a demon. And, after the blade was yanked out again and he fell to the ground, I took an alarmed step back at seeing Roderick standing there ever so smugly.

"Well," He said with a huff. "You certainly know how to go and get yourself into trouble, love."

Yet again I took another step back. "Who in the hell are you? Traveling salesman my ass!"

He snickered, cringing at the blood covered angel blade before wiping it off with a handkerchief.

"Yes, well. I suppose I did fib just a tad about that one." He replied.

"So?" I stared at the angel blade he held. "Who are you? Or to be more precise, _what _are you?"

"What I am," He replied after placing the blade back in his suit jacket. "Is your new best friend."

I squinted at him. "What do you mean?"

"Word's been spreading lately, heard quite a few interesting tales through the grapevine." He started. "Come to find out that a very high price had been set on a certain little nephlims head," He pointed at me. "_Your _head, darling. I thought, now, why in the world would heaven want to kill one of their own? Confounding, no?"

Swallowing hard, I shook my head. "Well as it turns out that's not very strange. Heaven doesn't care much for abominations after all."

"Yes, those little cloud hoppers really are quite prejudice aren't they? But, I digress. I decided that instead of allowing all of the demons and or angels that might be hunting you to kill you, that instead I might just take a glimpse at what's so frightening about you." He shrugged. "You seem harmless enough. Certainly not someone that deserves to be taken out so horribly anyhow." He took a step forward and yet again I inched backwards. "So my dear, I'm your new best friend because I've just decided to call off all of those demons that are coming after you."

I flinched slightly. "Does that mean you're a..."

"A demon?" His brows rose. "Yes, well... Don't hold it against me. After all, I just saved your life."

Well of course, I should have known! No wonder he was making me so damned uncomfortable. He'd been a bloody demon all along!

Now I just needed to decide what in the hell I was supposed to do. Something told me he was no ordinary demon, there was definitely something different about him; which led me to believe that had I tried to take him out somehow that it just might wind up getting me killed.

"Why do you care if I live or die?" I asked. "You don't even know me."

"Yes and I also know that had you the opportunity then you wouldn't hesitate to stick that blade in my gullet," He smirked. "But you won't. Because I'm much more useful to you alive."

"How so?" I stood tall. "Because, correct me if I'm wrong, but demons are nothing but dirty and evil beings that could care less for anyone but themselves. Why in the world would you want to help me?"

"Because I have information. Oh, and of course I have a rather important weapon in my possession, one that might come in handy in the fight against Lucifer." He turned and started to stroll his way to the alley exit, then paused and glanced over his shoulder at me. "Are you coming?"

Oh dear gods this was so stupid of me... I should have just jammed that blade into his back and ran away, or... Or called Castiel, because following him was...

"Where would we be going?" I replied, before moving.

"Somewhere we can chat. This area smells and of course there's two dead bodies that are bound to be discovered. I don't exactly fancy the idea of being here when that time comes." He started walking again. "So are you coming or not?"

Like I thought before... This was so so stupid of me...

"Oh and by the way," He stopped again. "My real name is Crowley."


	9. Chapter 9

**_Another chapter in less than a week, yay for not having writers block._**

* * *

><p>Stupid... Incredibly incredibly stupid is what I was. Why in the world was I following this demon? Why wasn't I instead trying to kill him or at the very least calling Castiel back, was beyond me.<p>

Maybe it was because he had just saved my life, or... Maybe it was the fact that he had claimed to have a weapon that could kill Lucifer. Which, I realize should have brought forth a million questions. Such as, why would he have such a weapon? Oh and most importantly, why would a demon actually want Lucifer dead?

It would be safe to assume that a demon would be in cahoots with Lucifer walking around the world free, wouldn't it?

But apparently there was something about this Crowley fellow that I just wasn't seeing. Either that, or... He was a liar and this was all some sort of scheme to fool me. Perhaps he intended to do something awful? Maybe it was a trick to lure my father out in the open, or Sam and Dean? I'm certain every demon in the world knew who Sam and Dean Winchester was now a days. After all, they had killed and exorcised so many of them, it would be a little difficult not to have heard of them. Not to mention that Dean was the one to break the first seal, and Sam released Lucifer and was meant to be his vessel.

So, why in the hell was I following Crowley still, even with all of these unanswered questions?

"Do try and keep up, love," Crowley said, turning to glance at me from over his shoulder. "If you're worrying I'm going to suddenly bite you or some nonsense, I'm not."

Instead of doing just that, I paused. Even more so when I felt my cell phone vibrating in my pocket. No sooner had I pulled it free did Crowley suddenly appear in front of me and snatched it right out of my hand.

"Let's see what we have here." He said, flicking the screen on and then raising both brows. "Oh, it seems to be a text from daddy dearest," Now he smiled. "Shall I read it?"

"Give me my phone back!" I snapped.

He ignored me and instead read over the text before then reading it aloud. "Alana, I'm afraid I'm going to be later than I expected. It seems I've stumbled onto something that could be very important and unfortunately it's too dangerous for you to come with me. Stay in the motel room and I'll return as soon as I'm able- Castiel."

He sneered at me after that and I was trying my best to refrain from punching his face in.

"Give me my phone." I said again. "At least let me-"

Now he started texting a response instead. "I understand," He spoke as he typed. "I'll stay in the motel room, but do be careful with whatever it is you're doing." After I heard the swoosh sound that came with the text being sent he stuffed the phone in his pocket. "I'll just hold on to that for right now, darling. You see, well... The _something _your father's stumbled onto happens to be myself, so..."

"Wait, what?" I replied.

"Frick and Frack, or better known as the Winchester brothers, they've learned about me and how I'm in possession of the colt, so to my knowledge they're currently concocting a plan to come and retrieve it from me." He straightened his posture and locked his eyes on mine. "So, I figured that the best way I could get through this without getting myself killed is if I have a little something I can bargain with."

I felt my lips cinch tightly. "Me? You're going to hold on to me so they won't come in guns blazing?"

"Exactly." He paused, then stared up at the bright morning sky. "So time to go."

"If you think I'm going to take another bloody step then you're mistaken!" I returned. "And give me one good reason why I shouldn't gut you right now!"

"With what?" He eyed me up and down. "You're unarmed."

"No I'm not, I've got my-" I stopped, feeling inside my jacket for my angel blade but noticed it missing.

Now he held up his hand and my blade magically appeared in it. "Oh you mean this? What do you take me for? Do you really think I'm going to let you hold on to something like this? You could kill me with it."

My lips parted but no sound could come out. How in the world had he managed that without me even knowing?

Since I couldn't exactly respond with words I instead felt around in my jacket more until finding that he hadn't bothered to take my pistol. So, I quickly yanked it free and shot one round off with struck him straight in the shoulder. No, I knew it wouldn't kill him, but I was angry dammit!

"Ow!" He yelped, stumbling backwards after the bullet struck him. "Bloody hell, woman! What in blazes is wrong with you?! Do you have any idea how much this suit costs?!"

I ignored that and instead shot him one more time, forcing him back a few more paces.

"Piss off!" I shrieked back. "Give me my phone and my blade or so help me I'll-"

"You'll do nothing." He interrupted, not looking nearly as amused as he had been. "Because you're cut off from heaven, you're powerless, which means you can't do shit to me and I've got the upper hand!" After examining the bloody holes in his suit jacket he shook his head. "And you're going to pay for the damage on this suit."

"Oh certainly, let me just pull a wad of money out of my ass!"

He arched a brow and tilted his head as though he was trying to look at my backside. "Well if you insist."

After a deep breath I told myself I needed to calm down because he did make one very good point.

I was powerless... And apparently without a weapon now so he definitely had the advantage. Not to mention he was a demon and could overpower me regardless if I was armed or not. So, if I stood any chance at getting out of this situation completely intact, then I really probably shouldn't have been trying to anger him so greatly.

"All right," I said after swallowing back my aggression. "You want to use me as a bargaining chip, so what do you intend to do?"

He glanced around the dead end and empty street we stood on. "Well I would like to leave here before those gun shots bring the police right to us. And really, this town is so small and unappealing, I would rather just return to my home and wait for those boys to show up."

"I'm not going to your home," I shook my head. "No, you're going to have to figure out something else."

Snickering, his eyes rolled. "Like you have a choice."

And poof, suddenly we weren't standing on that dead end street any longer and now I found myself right in the center of a dimly lit study with wood panel galore.

With a circle I examined my surroundings and noticed a fully ablaze fireplace behind a desk, and a large picture window that overlooked a nice green lawn.

"What... Where the hell am I now?"

"Like I said," Crowley replied, moving to his desk and in particular to a bottle of some sort of amber colored alcohol there. "My home."

"Oh well yes it's very lovely, but you do realize that once my father finds out you've abducted me he's going to throttle you? And, well... Dean will probably do something worse than that."

He poured two shots of the alcohol and then held one of the glasses out to me. I only stared at him with a scowl until he grabbed my hand and forced the glass in it.

"Actually," He said now. "Your father won't be throttling me today. You see, there's angel warding covering every inch of this house and the wall surrounding the property. And as far as Dean Winchester goes, well... There isn't much he can do to me. I've taken precautions."

"Precautions?" I returned.

"Yes, you don't live as long as I have and work yourself up to being King of the Crossroads by being dimwitted, after all." He sighed and sat down behind his desk. "Make yourself at home, love. But do me a favor and don't try anything shady; I'd hate for there to be some sort of accident in trying to stop you."

King... Of the Crossroads? Oh, well that's just sodding fantastic now isn't it? I knew I wasn't dealing with a regular old piss ant demon. No, apparently it was even worse than I imagined. With him being King of the crossroads he could have been capable of just about anything. After all, a piddly little demon would never be appointed that title now would he?

Well I was, as Dean would say, officially screwed.

* * *

><p>Dean moved across the motel room and flopped down at the table, the bacon cheeseburger he'd gotten not fifteen minutes ago hadn't even been touched yet. But, there was little time for stuffing his face.<p>

"Okay, so what's the plan?" He asked.

Castiel moved to the table now standing next to it and watching as Sam typed away on his laptop.

"If you were right and the demon Crowley has the colt, then we need to find a way of finding him that won't result in anyone dying." He said.

"Wow, really? Ya think?" Dean snortd. "No shit. I figured you'd be the best one to sniff the dick out, Cas. Ya know, seeing is that you're an angel and could just nuke the crap out of him if he tries to attack or something."

"That's an option, yes." Castiel sighed. "But if at all possible we need to leave him alive so we can successfully find the weapon. Which is why Sam and yourself needs to stay behind and allow me to follow him." He paused and watched them both for a few long seconds. "You never did explain to me just how you came to find out about Crowley in the first place?"

Sam visibly tensed up after that and Dean felt his eyes roll. "Let's just say that one of Chuck's crazy super fans filled us in."

"Chuck?" Castiel nodded. "Well it would be reasonable to assume he would know first hand what happened to the weapon."

"Yeah," Sam shook that off. "Anyways... How long do you think it'll take until you track Crowley down?"

"He's the King of the Crossroads," Castiel shrugged. "It shouldn't be too difficult. All I would have to do is find someone that's dealing with him."

"Some poor dumb s.o.b that's gonna go and sell his soul, huh?" Dean shuddered. "Okay, well then you better get to steppin' cause we can't leave Laney alone at that motel forever, right?"

Castiel now moved to a chair and sat, groaning quietly as he did so. "She's going to be very angry when she discovers we did all of this behind her back."

"Oh well," Dean smiled. "Least we know she's safe. And, she, uh... Well she didn't question you about what you might be doing?"

"No, which honestly surprised me. But, she's a reasonable girl. Maybe she knows that when it concerns me there's certain things that she can't be involved in?" Castiel replied.

Sam felt himself snicker after that. "I still say she's gonna tear you both a new one once she finds out what we've been doing."

"Well whatever," Dean sat back. "Just as long as I know she's safe, then I don't care how much she yells at me once it's all over and done with."

* * *

><p>"Just eat the pasta." Crowley said, scowling at me. "Really, taste it. It's delicious."<p>

"I'm not eating your damn pasta, Crowley!" I spat back. "I'm not hungry."

He averted his eyes to the ceiling, seeming to count to ten before saying, "It's been two days, you haven't eaten or drank anything since you've come here. Stop being a whining child and eat your bloody dinner or else I'm going to turn you over my knee and swat your backside." He paused and I felt my eyes go wide. "Come to think of it. That might be fun."

Now I grabbed the bowl of pasta and took a big heaping bite, slurping it up to the point that he cringed.

"You have terrible manners, darling." He commented.

After swallowing the bite I sat back and crossed my arms. "Shut up. I actually don't have terrible manners, I'm simply trying to show that you're not the boss over me and I don't have to listen to you."

"Oh now." He chuckled and I could barely hear him from across the long dining table. "You just don't want me to spank you."

"The second you even _attempt _something like that and I'll rip your arms out of their sockets." I replied and he continued to smile that infuriating smile of his. "I've been here for two, count them, two days, Crowley. What's going on? I thought you said that Sam and Dean were going to track you down?"

"I suppose I gave them a little too much credit," He answered. "How was I to know it was going to take the morons so long?"

"They're not morons!" I flew to my feet. "And I want my damn phone back!"

After hearing that he pulled it from his pocket and flicked it on. "Ah, look at that. Another text from your papa." He read it over with his brows raised. "Oh, seems as though he's worrying about his little girl. How sweet." Now I stomped around the table and tried to grab it but he jerked it away. "Let me just send a reply," Now he started typing it out. "I'm doing well, the motel is actually quite comfortable. There's no need to come and check on me."

A frown creased my face when I heard the message go through with a whoosh.

"Don't even get me started on the texts Dean's been sending." He added. "Scandalous they are."

"You're a pig." I flopped down in another chair. "A very disgusting pig, and personally I can't wait until they get here and beat the spit out of you."

"I actually think I'm quite pleasant to be around. And what's life without the occasional dirty limerick, hm?"

Except that it wasn't occasional, it was all the damn time. And if he wasn't saying something dirty then he was just sitting there gawking at me to the point that my face burned red. I didn't want to know what was going through his mind.

But, at least I could say that he hadn't harmed me at all. He hadn't touched me once and really, despite holding me here against my will he had taken excellent care of me. My bedroom was ridiculously large and extravagant; with only the most expensive bed linens. And the clothes in the closet were obviously expensive too and high quality. I don't know if he was going all of this to try and impress me, and if he was... Why on earth would he _try _to impress me in the first place?

And somehow I had a feeling that he wasn't relaying all of the messages Castiel and Dean were sending to me. For all I knew they could have been worried out of their minds and had found me missing from the motel a long time ago.

Not long after my outburst the door to the dining room creaked open as one of Crowley's demon henchmen moved inside. He walked straight over to Crowley and leaned down, whispering something in his ear.

"Oh," Crowley then perked up. "Well then I suppose I should go and handle that transaction myself." Now he stood. "Alana, darling, I'm going to have to ask that you wait here and stay out of trouble. There's a deal that I have to take care of."

"A deal?" I replied. "Some poor unsuspecting idiot that's going to sell his soul to you, hm?"

"What can I say, business is booming." He smiled. "You know very well that you can't escape so don't attempt it. There aren't any working phones in the house either so don't even contemplate calling your father or lover." I scowled at hearing Dean referred to like that. "I'll be back as soon as I can."

"Please by all means, take your time." I frowned.

He only snickered before vanishing from the room and I stayed sitting at the table for only a few seconds because I couldn't stand the way Crowley's little friend was eyeing me.

And, I knew he was right. I couldn't escape no matter how hard I might have tried. There were demons crawling over every inch of the property and all had orders watch me like a hawk. And I knew he was telling the truth about the phones as well because I'd tried a good dozen times to call Dean and Castiel and the lines were dead. Last but not least my only other option was praying to my father, but with having the house warded so extremely the prayers weren't getting through either.

So, I was stuck here. Trapped like a damn rat and really couldn't fathom how I was going to get out. At least not until Dean and Sam showed up... _IF _they showed up that is.

Still I couldn't help but wonder just why Crowley was so insistent that I remain here. He claimed it was to use me as some sort of bargaining chip to ensure that he wasn't harmed once the boys actually showed up. But somehow... It just didn't feel that way.

I started wandering around the large home after that, wishing that I could sprout wings and fly away from here. God only knows what Dean and my father were going to think once they realized, if they hadn't already, that I was missing. There was no way that this entire thing wasn't going to end anything but badly.

Since for the moment I wasn't being followed by one of Crowley's goons, I eventually found my way to his study. And before I knew it I was, not too obviously, snooping through his belongings. And overall I had to conclude that he didn't really have anything that interested me... Not at all. That is, not until I found my way to his computer and flicked it on.

Thanks to watching Sam I now knew how to search browser history and also skim through whatever files he might have had hidden on there. And... Needless to say that I was more than surprised to discover that he had dozens upon dozens of documents about... Me... Me... It was clearly my family tree starting from practically the 1400's stopping right at the year I was born which was 1688. Why? That's a very good question, I had no damn idea why he would be so interested in my family history. Not only was there my actual blood line, with who I now knew was my birth mother Elizabeth that Castiel had told me about, but there was the Campbell blood line as well since they were the ones who raised me.

Why in the world did he have so much information on me and my entire history?

Naturally I was alarmed, because the only thing I could think of was he was planning on using this information against me or Castiel somehow.

"I knew I should have left you with a babysitter." Crowley's voice rang out from behind me and I nearly wet myself. "Having fun, dear?"

I swung around quickly and fumbled to shut off the computer. I don't know why I bothered with that, he'd seen everything I was doing.

"I don't suppose you'd be kind enough to inform me just why you have so many things about me on there?" I replied.

He shrugged nonchalantly, waltzing over to me and staring down at his chair that I was clearly sitting in. After clearing his throat I jumped up and he sat.

"What can I say... It was an interesting read." He answered.

"An interesting read, eh?" I crossed my arms. "I demand to know what you're doing."

"Demand?" He sat back and eyed me up and down. "You know, you're just like your mother. She always used to make demands. Could be a real sodding pain in the backside as well, but still-"

"Wait a minute." I interrupted. "What are you talking about my mother?"

"Elizabeth." He replied. "Lovely girl. You really do look just like her, I was surprised actually." When he noticed my glare he sighed. "All right all right. You see, back before I was the strapping demon that I am now, I used to be a man. Remember, all demons were once human?"

"And you're trying to claim that you were acquainted with my birth mother?"

"I was, I knew her very well as a matter of fact."

Was he lying? I just couldn't tell, dammit! That snarky gleam never left his eyes, even when he was making some sort of threat, so it was impossible to read whether or not he was feeding me a hoard of horse shit.

"And how exactly did you know my mother?" I asked now.

"I traveled once when I was a young man. In my late twenties. I met her in a little village about fifty miles or so from London. She'd ventured her way there, as I recall, because the Campbell family were tracking vampires that were slaughtering poor farming families." He shrugged. "Lovely woman, but she had a temper on her. I see now that you've inherited that trait from her."

When had I began to pace? It was only when I realized I had made a good ten laps across his study did I moved over to a leather club chair and take a seat.

"I don't believe you." I said. "You're a liar. You didn't know my mother."

"Hm, all right. If you say so. But just say you did believe me; it would explain why I might have sought you out... Don't you agree?"

"No," I gaped at him. "That doesn't explain it at all! If anything it only makes me even more confused because why would you give a rats ass about-"

My sentence cut off when a sudden thought struck me... What if he sought me out because he held some sort of affection for my birth mother? Oh gods... That was a disturbing thought now wasn't it?

"Okay, so you say you knew my mother. Let's just say I did believe you... What year were you born?" I asked.

"1661." He answered.

"And _where _were you born?"

He tapped his fingertips on the arm of his chair. "I'm afraid I can't tell you that, love."

"Why not?"

"Because, that information is dangerous for me. I tell you where I was born, then there's a possibility you or someone that might wish to do me harm, could find out who I was when I was human... That's not something I'm not eager to release."

Why exactly? Oh who cares, it doesn't matter. All of this was just... Disturbing.

"Anyhow," He poured himself another glass of what I now knew was Craig. "Aren't you eager to find out where your father and boyfriend are?"

Now I sat up straight and stiff. "Did they-"

"Your daddy managed to find me while I was conducting my business. He followed me back here too as a matter of fact. Couldn't bypass the angel warding though, but that doesn't matter. I suspect that Sam and Dean should be arriving any minute now."

After that statement the lights in the study and entire home as a matter of fact suddenly went off.

"Ah," Crowley smiled. "Right on time." Now he stood from the desk and I eagerly jumped up as well. "Wait here, darling. Don't do anything stupid."

He vanished again and of course I darted straight for the study door, only to notice it had been locked up tight.

Typical... Why wasn't I surprised at all?

Yet again I started pacing, listening to the eerie silence that had befell the household that seemed to last forever. It felt like hours that I waited in that damn study, hoping to hear Dean calling out to me, hoping that I could somehow get out some kind of warning to him in time before Crowley did something horrible. Before long I heard a gun shot, which made my heart fall to my stomach, then half a second after that another gun shot before the house went silent once again.

I tried desperately to get the door open again, but Crowley had obviously used a little demonic tinkering to keep it sealed shut. Unfortunately I was stuck in there and couldn't even break the damn window to try and escape either.

Now I fell back onto the club chair and rested my head in my hands, trying to stay calm and tell myself over and over again that those two gun shots were not meant for Dean and Sam. They were fine... They had to be.

Another agonizing minute or two later I finally heard the study door creak open and I leapt to my feet.

Crowley entered first and moved to his desk, and to my relief Dean and Sam soon followed.

Naturally once the boys saw me standing there Dean skidded to a stop.

"Laney?" He muttered, obviously trying to tell whether or not he was hallucinating me there. "What the hell are you..." His question stopped once he turned and glared point blank at Crowley. "What did you do?"

"Calm down," Crowley returned. "She's perfectly fine. I've been taking good care of her. Haven't I, darling?"

I scowled and Dean stomped over to me and instantly took a protective stance in front of me.

"I'm fine, Dean." I said, latching onto his hand. "I've been here for two bloody days though."

"Two days?" Dean went ashen. "Then, who the hell's been texting me?"

Crowley pulled my phone from his pocket and waved it in the air with that same little sneer.

"That would be me."

"Whoa, hold on a second." Dean fumbled on his feet. "So all that, uh... Stuff... That was said... Didn't even come from Laney?"

I squinted up at him. "What was said?"

Dean's eyes went shifty after that before shaking his head. "Never mind. Not important... Just... Why is Laney here? What did you do?"

Crowley sighed and tossed me my phone, finally. "Precaution. I had to be sure that you buffoons didn't get it into your heads to simply burn my house down on top of me. Besides... I wanted the company and but for Alana's terrible temper and attitude, it's been lovely having her here." He pulled the top drawer on his desk open, then reached into his inner jacket and pulled out a gun. "Let's just get on with this. You came here for the colt, yes?"

Sam cleared his throat and cast a quick glance to Dean and I. "Yeah... We did."

"Wonderful," Crowley then laid the gun on the edge of his desk. "Well there it is... By all means, take it." Neither Sam or Dean moved and Crowley shook his head. "Look, this isn't a trick. I want you to take the gun."

"Why?" Dean returned.

"Because I want you to take it and empty the barrel straight into Lucifer's face, that's why."

The atmosphere in the room was nothing short of a cloud of confusion. Not only from the boys, but from myself as well.

"Uh," Dean took a small step forward and I followed. "Why exactly do you want us to do that?"

Sighing, Crowley placed his hands in his pockets. "It's not that difficult if you just sit and think about it. Really, think about it. Lucifer hates humanity, loathes humans to such an extent that he was locked up in hell for centuries. Now that he's released he's going to try his best to slaughter each and every one of you. After humanity's been wiped out, what then? Who do you think he's going to go after next?" He paused, looking to each of us. "Anyone? No one wants to make a guess?"

"So," Sam awkwardly scratched his head. "You think that after he's exterminated humans, that he's gonna come after you? Or... Demons?"

"Exactly. Because what are demons anyhow? We were once human, and there's no way that Lucifer's going to stand for us roaming about the planet any longer."

"But," Dean took yet another step closer and I realized he was trying his best to get near the colt. "He created you? Why would he want to destroy you?"

Crowley's face fell flat as he gaped at me. "Are they always this blockheaded?" He stood tall. "Use your imaginations. Lucifer's an archangel, he only created us demons as a way of angering big daddy upstairs. Once all of this is over and done with and he's claimed the planet for his own, he'll have no use for demon filth like us. So take that damn gun and blow his sodding head off with it. We'll all be winning with that, don't you agree?"

Sam was the one to warily reach for the colt first, hovering his hand over it for a good second to make certain Crowley wasn't going to lunge at him before scooping it up.

"Okay, so... You wouldn't happen to know where Lucifer is, do you?" Sam asked just as awkwardly.

"Oh," Crowley stood tall again. "Sources tell me he's got an appointment coming up the day after next in Carthage Missouri."

Yes this was just as big a surprise to me as it was to Dean and Sam. Never in a million years would I guessed that Crowley would actually hand over the colt willingly... There had to be some catch all of this... Shouldn't there?

"Oh, um..." Sam nodded. "Okay... Thanks." And, no big surprise again when he rose the colt and pointed it straight at Crowley's face... And... No big surprise when he pulled the trigger and all he got was a click.

Dean went noticeably stiff after that, and I felt my throat slam shut, but Crowley only stared up at Sam with that same cocky smirk.

"Oh, you probably want more ammunition." He said, then pulled a leather pouch out of his desk drawer.

"So..." Dean spoke, but it didn't seem as though anyone knew quite what to say. "If we do this... Where are you gonna be?"

"Me?" Crowley snickered. "Well after this it's safe to assume that every demon in creation is going to be after my head, not to mention Lucifer himself will be storming after me. So I'm going to go deep deep underground on an extended vacation to all points no where. So do me a favor and make certain you don't miss, because if you do it won't just be myself that Lucifer will come after and rip to shreds." He paused and passed me a quick glance. "Alana, it was lovely having you here, do take care of yourself."

After tossing the pouch of ammunition to Sam I can't say I was surprised to see Crowley vanish from the study. And once it was obvious he wasn't coming back, Dean turned to face me.

"Are you okay?" He asked.

I nodded. "I'm fine. Really he didn't do anything to me, unless of course you count wearing on my last nerve."

"You've been here for two days?" Sam asked now.

"Yes, he was in the town Castiel left me in, and I was attacked by two demons... Crowley killed them."

Dean then pinched the bridge of his nose. "Jeez, okay. Let's just get outa here and then we can talk about this some more. No shit Cas is gonna be just as surprised as we were."

Most likely that would be an understatement. Castiel was going to be... Well, livid probably.

And I was right. It didn't take us long to leave Crowley's mansion and property because once he abandoned it it seemed every single one of his goons ran right along with him. We didn't encounter a single demon on our way out, and afterwards since they didn't have their vehicle we ended up walking to the nearest motel and getting settled in. That's when Dean called Castiel and informed him that they had managed to find the weapon.

Seconds later Castiel appeared in the room completely frantic.

"I can't find Alana," He said, his back facing me as I sat on the bed. "She wasn't in the motel I left her in and she wasn't anywhere near the town either."

Dean only gaped at him with no expression and I stood and cleared my throat.

"Yes, well... Here I am... Surprise." I said.

Castiel swung around and heaved out a deep breath. "What are you doing here? How did-"

"Crowley took her." Dean interrupted. "Apparently she's been there for two damn days."

"Two days?" Castiel croaked out.

"Yeah... I'll be the first to say that we fucked up bad with this one. We never should've left her at that damn motel."

"Wait," I shook my head. "So your intentions were to just leave me there while you ran off and dealt with Crowley?" All three of them fell unusually silent after that. "Oh, well that's just wonderful."

"We only did it to protect you, Alana." Castiel said. "We thought it would be safer for you if you stayed behind at the motel because we had no idea how this Crowley was going to respond to us."

"I'd say that plan went swimmingly," I replied sarcastically. "Seeing is that I wasn't even in that town twenty four hours and Crowley had already found me. Not to mention that two other demons had managed to track me down and intended to kill me. Oh, also... Apparently there's some sort of hit out on me from heaven. Demons, angels, who the hell knows who else wants to hunt me down and kill me. Of course now that I know Crowley personally it wouldn't surprise me to know that all of that, his rescuing me from the attackers, was probably just a show to get me to trust him. But, never mind that... What I want to know is when all of you are going to stop treating me like a child and actually trust me enough to help you with important missions?"

Yet again they fell into silence until Dean cleared his throat.

"Look, uh... It's not that we don't trust you or something, because we do. It's just... This could've been really dangerous and we wanted to be sure you were safe."

It was in that moment once I saw the look on each of their faces did it suddenly hit me what was going on.

They figured that my presence might have been somewhat of a hindrance to them because as we all know... I'm definitely not a warrior. I had no skills what so ever when it came to fighting, it actually frightened me. Yes, I had been forced to kill in the past but in my opinion that was pure dumb luck that I'd managed it. It was a wonder I hadn't been gutted a million times because I was so poor at self defense.

Well... After I realized that it was safe to say that I was so embarrassed and ashamed I wanted to hide under the bed. The last thing I wanted to become was some fragile little doll that everyone felt they needed to coddle. I wanted to pull my own weight, to help them, and if they were actually going to resort to lying to me and leaving me behind on missions then... What the hell was I supposed to do?

"I, um," I cleared my throat and hoped the humiliation wasn't gleaming from my features. "I think I'd like to take a shower and go to bed. It's been a long two days."

I tried to pass off a smile before escaping to the adjoining room and locking myself in the bathroom.

This just wasn't going to work anymore. How could I travel with Dean and Sam knowing that they didn't trust me to watch out for myself... Or them... I needed to do something, and soon, or else it wouldn't be long before they were locking me in the trunk of the Impala or in a padded room somewhere so I wouldn't fall down and hurt my bloody self.

But actually finding a way of fixing that wasn't going to be so easy. Castiel was far too busy now a days in his search for God, so it's not as though I could ask him to train me somehow. And it's not as though I had any other angels that could assist me with that. Gadreel was... Back in heavens prison, I'm assuming. And... I simply couldn't ask Dean for help. That would be even more humiliating.

One thing at a time though, I told myself. I supposed I could deal with that after we hunted down and killed the devil. Although, what was going to stop them from leaving me behind with that one as well? They certainly better not have tried that, I wouldn't stand for it!

After a shower and lingering in the bathroom long enough to dry my hair and completely rearrange the towels on the rack, I pulled the door open and stepped back into the bedroom.

Dean was sitting in the armchair with the remote control in hand when I stepped out, then quickly flicked the television off and jumped to his feet.

"Feel better?" He asked.

"I suppose so." I replied. "Where's Castiel?"

"Went back out there on his daddy search." He answered. "Said he might come back in the morning if he could. I think, he... Well, I think he felt bad about lying to you or something, was afraid you'd bite his head off."

"Believe me, I was thinking about it." I said, then moved over to my duffel and stuffed my clothes inside. "I'm thinking about doing the same thing with you too, Dean."

He shrugged at that. "Yeah well you can be pissed at me all you want. But I'd still make the same call all over again if I had to."

"Why?" I swung around and glared at him "Am I really so helpless and useless, Dean?"

"Uh, no?" He shook that off. "It's not about that. It's about safety. Me and your dad might disagree on a lot of things, but the one thing we do agree on is making sure nothing happens to you. You've been through too much already and we wanna keep that from happening again."

"Maybe so... But you can't keep things like this from me, and you can't keep treating me like a child. As far as I'm concerned, if I can survive three centuries in heavens prison being continuously tortured, then I think I can survive anything that's thrown at me down here."

He sighed at that, lowering his eyes to the floor. "Okay. I'm sorry we lied to you, Laney. It won't happen again." Now he moved closer and pulled me into a tight hug. "Anyways... I missed you while you were gone."

"Did you?" I chuckled.

"Well yeah... Didn't you miss me?"

"Hm." I squeezed him tighter. "Maybe a little."

He snickered and kissed the top of my head. "Well, it's late. So why don't you get some sleep. We got a lot of crap to plan before we go take down Lucifer."

I pulled away long enough to peer up at him. "What? You're not going to stay in here with me?"

His brows rose. "You want me to?"

"That's a silly question." I stood tall and planted a firm kiss on him. "Of course I do."

When he kissed me again, it was safe to say that whatever anger or humiliation I might have been feeling previously completely vanished.

He was very good at taking a girls mind off of things after all.


	10. Chapter 10

_**Thanks to everyone who's following and reviewing for this story. I hope everyone likes it :)**_

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><p>"So... How do you think this is going to go, Dean?" I asked.<p>

"Hm," He muttered back, half asleep. "We'll muddle through, just like we always do."

Muddle through... I couldn't help but sigh deeply at that. Because this wasn't some regular hunting job of theirs... The ones that you took a risk of getting a broken bone or a few scratches and gashes, no, this by far was so much more dangerous. This was going after the very devil himself.

But if we weren't going to do it, then who else would? No one. God didn't seem to be stepping up to settle all of this himself, and there wasn't anyone else in the world that had the power to slay Lucifer; which meant that it was up to us. It appeared we had the only weapon in creation that could get the job done after all.

I opened my eyes and gazed at Dean laying beside me, noticing that he was obviously starting to drift off. It was expected, the last two hours had been rather exhausting as a matter of fact. It was still strange to me to know that I was in such an intimate relationship. Strange but extremely wonderful at the same time. Despite the dangerous goings on in the world, the constant fear of wondering if we were going to be harmed or killed... I was happy. I was happy that I had my father in my life now, I had Dean who was proving to me more and more each day that he was completely wonderful, and I had Sam that I considered a little brother as well by now.

"Are you asleep?" I whispered.

He jolted slightly and then still with his eyes closed let out a quiet laugh. "Nope... Guess not."

"What are we going to do exactly, Dean? Lucifer's going to be in that town the day after tomorrow. What should we do?"

Now he opened his eyes just barely and drowsily looked over to me. "Don't you worry about that, sweetheart. We'll figure it out."

"Still," I frowned. "It would be nice to have some form of an idea."

He pulled me closer, wrapping his arms around me until my head was resting on his chest.

"We're gonna drive up to Bobby's tomorrow, meet up with Ellen and Jo cause they're gonna give us a hand. Then... We'll figure it out from there." He answered.

I fell silent and listened to Dean's slow and steady heartbeat. For several long minutes I laid there like that, and loathed the moment we stepped into that town because something could happen to him.

"Are you afraid?" I asked now, and considering he didn't jolt he must not have drifted off again.

He sighed deeply and after passing him a quick glance I noticed his eyes locked on the ceiling.

"Not sure afraid's the right word to use," He replied. "Apprehensive, maybe."

"And you're not at all scared?" I sat up on my elbow and peered down at him. "Not at all?"

Now his eyes moved to mine. "Depends... I'm not really scared for myself. But... When I think about you and Sammy being there, that scares me."

"But you know that we're still going, you can't force us to stay behind?"

He nodded. "I know. Not like that worked out all too well the last time we tried to leave you outa something, right?"

Definitely not, considering Crowley managed to find me and snatch me right up.

"But," He went on. "I'm not gonna let anything happen to either of you, I promise."

He pulled me down and kissed me after that, and as he did so I could sense just exactly how afraid he actually was about this entire thing.

He was genuinely frightened for Sam and I, enough so that whatever negative emotions he had were transferred straight to me. Even though whatever abilities I had were fading more and more the longer Castiel and I were cut off from heaven, I could still feel everything Dean was experiencing right then. Naturally it worried me, because if he was so focused on protecting Sam and I... It very well might have led him into getting hurt himself.

The kiss was desperate almost, as though he felt it might never happen again and now I felt that same fear trickling through me.

When he pulled away his pupils were dilated to twice their size and the flush had returned to his cheeks.

"We gotta get some sleep," He said, despite that. "We're drivin' to Bobby's at first light."

He reached over and flicked off the bedside lamp and I snuggled up as close as I could get to him.

If he wasn't going to talk about what he was truly feeling right then... I knew even I couldn't force anything out of him.

* * *

><p>The next morning I was practically in a fog as I readied myself. As it turns out my mind wouldn't calm down the night before and I only managed to get two hours sleep at the most. Now I was practically walking around the motel room half asleep as I dressed myself and packed up the rest of my things in preparation for the drive to Bobby's.<p>

I suppose I was still worrying about Dean. No, not supposed... I definitely was. Naturally the thought of him being distracted when we went on this mission wasn't comforting. It would only lead him into getting hurt and... Gods, that scared me so badly.

Which meant that I was going to have to be even more on guard than usual so I could make certain nothing happened to him... Or anyone else...

"Everything packed up?" Dean asked, peaking in past the adjoining room door.

"I believe so yes," I answered, then stifled back a long yawn. "How long do you think the drive's going to be?"

"Ten hours probably, we should be able to make it one go." He watched me laggardly move across the room and grab my bag. "Good thing you're not driving, Laney. You look beat."

"I didn't get as much sleep as I wanted I suppose."

He moved inside and pulled me into a hug. "You okay?"

"Yes of course... I'm just tired."

"Understandable." He sneered. "Last night was kinda crazy."

"Yeah, uh-" Sam suddenly said as he stepped into the room. "I think we need to talk about this whole adjoining room thing cause last night I could hear everything that was going on in here."

My face immediately turned blood red. "Um, what?"

"The vent in the bathroom," Sam said, pointing towards my open bathroom door. "Connects right into mine. So, I got a pretty vivid audio show last night you guys."

"C'mon, Sammy-" Dean snickered. "Wasn't that bad was it?"

"Not exactly something I wanna hear, Dean," Sam replied. "Was pretty, uh... Graphic and disturbing."

I buried my face in my hands. "Oh gods... This is so humiliating."

"It's a beautiful and natural act and Sammy needs to lighten the fuck up." Dean finished with that same sarcastic sneer.

"Whatever," Sam shook it off and motioned to the door. "So are we ready?"

"Yeah," Dean kissed my cheek quickly. "Let's roll."

He grabbed my bag before I could and carried it with him to the car and after throwing on my jacket I quickly followed.

Honestly I was surprised that Castiel hadn't returned yet. The night before Dean claimed that he'd left because he was upset or ashamed of leaving me behind, but... I wasn't certain if that could have been why. But, after climbing into my usual seat in the back of the Impala I nearly wet my knickers when Castiel suddenly appeared beside me.

"Goodness," I said, heaving out a deep breath. "You would think I would be used to something like that by now."

"I'm sorry," He replied, then eyed me closely. "How are you, Alana?"

"I'm fine. And if you're wondering if I'm still angry at you... I'm not."

He immediately eased up after that. "Good. I realize that you don't want us to treat you like a child or coddle you, but... You _are _my child, and maybe it's not fair of me to make those decisions without consulting in your first but I want to protect you, Alana. And I suppose that because of that, sometimes I make decisions that you might not approve of. I hope you can understand that and not hold it against me."

I smiled and scooted across the seat and kissed his cheek. "Of course I understand. I might not like it sometimes, but if I had a child of my own I know I would be the same way."

After an awkward little smile he cleared his throat and sat up straight. "So, has Dean mentioned at all what the plans are?"

Before I could answer the drivers side door pulled open and Dean jumped in.

"Laney, I can't find the condoms, did you pack them in your bag?" He asked and I immediately went stiff.

Once he heard my silence he turned and glanced to the backseat noticing Castiel sitting beside me with his lips cinched and eyes squinted.

"Ah shit." Dean then muttered. "Uh... Hey, Cas. When did you pop back up?"

Castiel didn't answer right off and continued on with that obvious angry glare before passing me a quick glance.

"Five minutes ago." He finally said, and I was just waiting for fists to start flying.

Honestly, up until the night before I had no idea what a "condom" was. It's not as though I was at all acquainted in anything that might have been considered a contraceptive. And... Well, the first time Dean and I had been together there wasn't anything used. Really, I had no idea that something like that even existed. Castiel however must have known, because why else would he look so blasted angry?

"So," Dean cleared his throat uncomfortably. "Yeah, uh... Not sure what I should say here, but..."

"How long has this been going on?" Castiel interrupted.

I wished I could melt into the cars floor right about then just to avoid this conversation.

"Not long." Dean answered. "Really, and... Well, yeah I get you might be pissed or not approve or something, but just try to remember that me and Laney... It's not about _that_, okay?"

"What is it about then, Dean?" Castiel returned.

Dean shifted in his seat after that. "Well, come on, man... We talked about this before, remember?"

My eyes anxiously went back and forth from Castiel to Dean, and really... I fully expected Castiel to respond somewhat negatively, but... To my surprise he didn't.

"I remember," Castiel said with a sigh. "And as much as something like that might make me uncomfortable or make me _deliriously_ angry-" He paused and I tensed up even more. "I understand that you care about my daughter and she cares for you as well, so... Just... Avoid this topic of conversation around me from here on out."

"Shyeah," Dean snorted. "Don't worry about that... Not gonna happen again."

When Sam finally climbed in the car, thankfully that conversation was over and done with. But, that certainly didn't ease the tension at all.

It was embarrassing enough to find out that morning that Sam had overheard everything Dean and I had been doing the night before, but... Now my own father was well aware I was having a sexual relationship with Dean...

I just wanted to crawl in a hole and die I was so humiliated.

Castiel was quiet as we drove to a diner for breakfast, and quiet still as we sat in the booth and glanced over the menu. He didn't seem angry anymore really, but I wouldn't say he was happy either. I hoped he understood that just because I loved Dean, it didn't at all mean I no longer cared for or needed him, because of course I did.

I very much hoped that in the future I wasn't placed into a situation where I felt as though I needed to choose between the two of them...

"Have you decided how you're going to successfully use the colt on Lucifer?" Castiel asked, breaking the awkward silence.

Dean lowered the menu and shrugged. "We hadn't really talked about it yet. Was gonna wait til we got to Bobby's."

"I see." Castiel sat straight and stiff beside me, and still I awaited the inevitable moment when he would decide to take a swing at Dean. "But I was thinking, maybe it wouldn't be wise if we all went on this mission."

"What do you mean?" I replied.

"Lucifer is definitely going to be on his guard, he probably already suspects something is going to happen. If an entire group drives into that town he's going to know it. It might be easier, and smarter, if only one or two of us go."

Sam shifted his eyes from Castiel to Dean. "Who'd you have in mind?"

"Myself of course," Castiel answered. "Possibly Dean or you."

"No," I spat quickly. "No there's not a way I'm going to let the both of you go in there alone."

"Alana, I'm an angel; and out of everyone here I would most likely be the only one that could get close enough to Lucifer to use the colt on him. It really is the safest option we have."

"I don't care," I crossed my arms over my chest. "I swear to god if you try to leave me out of this one then I'll somehow find a way to drive myself to that damn town anyhow."

Castiel arched a brow at that, giving me a glare that I could only describe as a look any other angry father would give their child.

"That would be a little impossible to accomplish if I put you half way around the world." He added.

Dean sighed and thumped his hands down on the table. "Okay you two, enough of that. Look, Cas, I don't like the thought of Laney or Sam, or _anyone _for that matter, runnin' into that town but like it or not... It's gotta be done. If anything with having that many people there we could form some kinda distraction while whoever's gonna fire the shot moves in. But, let's not make any definite plans right now; let's just wait til we get to Bobby's and meet up with Ellen and Jo."

Yet again Castiel fell silent, and didn't speak much on the trip to Bobby's either. By that point I was starting to wonder if it was overhearing what Dean had said that morning that was really causing his silence. By that point... I was starting to believe it was his way of concocting some sort of way to leave me out of this entire mission. Knowing him... It wouldn't have surprised if he truly did send me half way around the world just so I couldn't go.

Everything became all the more awkward once we actually arrived at Bobby's. There was an odd sensation over the air that was nothing but hostility, anger, fear and every other negative emotion a person might feel.

Jo and Ellen arrived shortly before we had, and it wasn't hard for me to realize that Castiel and I seemed to be fish out of water. Even though we were in on this mission just as much as the next person, we both found ourselves standing off on the sidelines watching everyone interact and scheme while we remained silent.

I wasn't certain what was causing this unusual cloud of tension, but if I had to guess I would say it was just the situation in general. Going off to slay the devil wasn't something a person could easily come to terms with.

After the first few hours I found myself wandering aimlessly through Bobby's house because for some odd reason I just didn't want to stand in the kitchen and listen any longer. Maybe it was because of the entire Lucifer fiasco, maybe it was because with being what I am I just felt uncomfortable around anyone other than Dean, Sam and Castiel. Or... Maybe it was because Jo was blatantly throwing advances towards Dean with no cares whatsoever that I was standing right there.

I was over three hundred years old... I was far too old for childish games like that. Or, perhaps it was just because I simply couldn't stand to watch it any longer for fear I might smack her pretty face in.

By the time I stopped wandering I had moved to stand in front of a large window towards the back of the home that overlooked Bobby's junkyard. And, naturally I wasn't alone for very long before Castiel moved up beside me.

"Are you all right?" He asked.

Sighing deeply, I leaned against the windowsill and shrugged. "I'm not certain."

He glanced over his shoulder and down the hallway, where the kitchen waited in the distance.

"You can tell me," He went on. "If something happened, or... If you're upset over something, you know you can confide in me."

"I know," I nodded. "Maybe it's just... I was thinking about what you said at the diner... How allowing a large group of people to traipse into that town would be dangerous."

He moved closer. "And? You agree with me?"

I nodded again. "Yes. But, not with everything you said. You said it would be best if you and maybe one other person were the only ones to go into that town. I don't think it should be Sam or Dean."

Now he sighed as his posture stiffened. "You think it should be you and I?"

"Yes." I barely shifted my eyes to his nervously. "Because you and I are different. We have advantages compared to the others. Yes maybe whatever abilities I have are fading from you and I being cut off from heaven, but still... It just seems to me that it would be better if it was just us there, Castiel. Why endanger them? What sense does that make?"

He shook his head and took a few steps away. "I understand why you're suggesting this, Alana. Because you love Dean and you don't want anything to happen to him-"

"It's not only Dean," I interrupted. "Yes of course I love him and I don't want him to get hurt, but it's also Sam, and Ellen and Jo. I just don't think that we should stand back and allow all of these innocent people to be hurt when you and I very well could stop this all on our own." I swallowed hard. "If I had things my way I wouldn't let you go into that town either. But, as much as it frightens me to admit... We're the only ones that might stand somewhat of a chance. You have your wings, and some powers still, which means we could make a quick get away if we had to, and if there's demons there then you could easily smite them."

"But what about you?" He returned. "You _don't _have any powers right now, and if by some slim chance that you did, they would be faint and essentially useless. Which means you would be just as vulnerable as Dean or the others would be. And... What kind of father would I be if I allowed you to do something like this?"

I bit back tears. "That's the entire issue with everything lately, Castiel... You believing you can _allow _me to do one thing or another, when in truth... I'm perfectly able to make my own decisions, no matter how dangerous they may be." Now I firmly locked my eyes on his. "This isn't about me... This isn't about you or Dean or Sam. This is about the entire fate of the world, and you know just as much as I do that we have to do whatever we have to to stop Lucifer... Even if it means allowing your daughter to die to accomplish that."

His lips cinched tightly after that as he turned his back to me. "That's the difference between you and I... You're perfectly willing to run into something that very well might get you killed, and I'm not at all willing to let that happen. I don't care the aftermath, even if it means Lucifer walks away from all of this, I'm not going to let anything happen to you."

Yes that definitely wasn't at all surprising to hear.

"And yet you don't seem to realize that if Lucifer walks away, if he wins, then we're all damned anyhow." I replied. "So really... What's the difference? At least with this we know we _tried _to stop him. We _tried _to do the right thing."

The fact that he wasn't looking at me now was all the proof I needed to show that he knew I was right. It was definitely conflicting, and a situation that no parent should ever find themselves in. But, it was the truth. Either Lucifer kills us when we tried to kill _him_, or he kills us when he destroys the world. Personally, I would rather go out trying to stop him rather than running and hiding and watching the entire planet die.

"All right," He relented. "So... You and I go to Carthage. What do we do about _them_?" He motioned to the kitchen.

"You're an angel," I answered with a sad little smile. "It shouldn't be too hard for you to make certain they don't follow us."

I hated the horrified expression that was on his face now. With being an angel you would automatically assume that he would be strong and sturdy and never crumble, but... Right about then it seemed very much that he might.

"I can do that," He nodded. "They can sleep through the entire thing. They won't suspect a thing."

Now that horrified expression changed to just plain sad, and I had an inkling that my own didn't fair much better. So, I only hugged him tightly, resting my head on his shoulder and tried to shake that horrible god awful sensation that was swirling in my gut.

If this worked out the way I intended... Sam and Dean wouldn't step foot into that town... Nothing would happen to them... I wouldn't have to watch either of them be hurt, thank god.

"You should return to the kitchen," Castiel said after stroking the back of my head. "You need to act normal, or else they'll suspect we're up to something."

With a deep breath I pulled away. "All right. What are you going to do?"

"I'm going to make a quick trip near Carthage, to try and examine the town and familiarize myself with everything there."

"Is that safe to do? What if Lucifer is already there?"

"I'll be careful, he won't detect me, Alana." He smiled weakly, but it was incredibly fake. "Go back to the kitchen, I'll return soon."

He vanished shortly after that, and I managed to compose myself enough to return to the kitchen and take a seat beside Dean at the table.

He immediately passed me a smile and wink, then draped his arm across the back of my chair.

"You okay?" He asked quietly.

"Of course," I replied. "What have you got planned so far?"

"The usual," Sam answered. "Drive up into town and search until we see ugly."

Which to me, was all the more confirmation I needed to know that what Castiel and I were planning was the right thing to do. It's not as though they would stand a chance of going into that town unnoticed. Sam especially since he was meant to be Lucifer's vessel.

"And, that's all?" I returned. "Doesn't that seem a little reckless to you?"

"Yeah," Dean nodded. "But, with somethin' like this, it's not like we got a whole lot of options."

"We figured that he was gonna know we're coming to being with," Jo chimed in after moving closer to the table. "So, why not just go in guns blazing?"

My stomach twisted at that thought, because I knew that Sam and Dean probably did that with every job they ever went on long before I joined them. It was a wonder they hadn't died ages ago.

Well... I guess they both had, now hadn't they? Sam was killed, which in turn led Dean into selling his soul... Then he died... Gods...

"So," Dean cleared his throat and tried to ignore what everyone was surely feeling right about then. "Who's for pizza and beer?"

Before long he had made a trip into town and bought a stack of pizzas and with the variety of beer and alcohol Bobby already had in his home, everyone was well on their way to drinking themselves into the floorboards.

Although, I think I was the only one that considered actually getting inebriated. As far as I was concerned it would help me to void out what Castiel and I were going to do.

Of course I felt guilty, because I was hiding all of this from Dean, was lying straight to his face and he had no idea. He didn't have any inclinations that I intended to jet off with Castiel and leave them behind... That I very well might not come back alive... That this night, very well might be the last night I ever spent with him. With having those dreadful thoughts it took every ounce of strength to keep myself from sobbing; which I guess of course explained why I was drinking so excessively.

Castiel returned not long after the drinking started, passing me a subtle glance and nod to let me know he had examined the town and probably memorized every square inch of it. And, just as I was, he was pretending to act as normal as normal could be. Or... What was considered normal for him anyhow. He actually decided to have some form of a drinking game with Ellen and Jo and needless to say that it was obvious he would drink them under the table. It's not so easy for an angel to become intoxicated after all.

The radio in the kitchen was playing some sort of song quietly, just barely audible over everyone's voices and I found my mind drifting off as my vision started to go woozy.

"Hey," Dean said, snickering at me and taking my glass. "Think you've had enough there, sweetheart."

"Have I?" I replied, then rubbed my head.

"Pretty sure, yeah. Can't let you have a hangover tomorrow, right?" He reached to the counter behind me and grabbed a slice of pizza. "Soak up the alcohol with this."

I took the slice and a small bite afterwards, letting my eyes trace every freckle he might have had. That didn't last long before I grabbed his hand and pulled him out of sight from my father and the others, then slammed him with a kiss that he was not at all prepared for.

He didn't mind it of course and recovered from the shock of it as he pushed me against the wall and tangled his fingers in my hair.

I hoped and prayed that this wouldn't be the last time this happened between us. I hoped that Castiel and I actually survived what we were going to attempt.

Dean only pulled away once footsteps emerged in the hallway we were in.

"Uh," Sam cleared his throat. "Sorry, guys. Didn't mean to, uh... Ya know-" He fidgeted awkwardly. "Bobby has some things he wants to go over with everyone before we leave."

"Yeah," Dean replied, then blew out a deep breath. "We're comin'."

Dean walked away first and I took a moment to calm myself down before glancing over and seeing Sam still standing there.

"You okay?" He asked. And it seemed both brothers could read me like an open book now. "You've been kinda quiet tonight, Laney."

I forced off a smile and nod. "I'm fine, Sam, thank you. I think I'm just trying to prepare myself for what's going to happen tomorrow."

"Yeah," He sighed at that. "I think we all are." After a glimpse into the kitchen he inched closer. "Hey, um... I wanted to talk to you about something before we head out tomorrow."

"All right? What is it?"

He took a moment to pause and stare at his feet. "We both know that what we're gonna be doing is crazy and dangerous. And Dean, he's... He's so dead set on watching out for the both of us that he might not be able to watch out for himself, you know?" I nodded. "So, someone needs to be keeping an eye on him and making sure he doesn't get hurt... That needs to be you, Laney."

I tried to fake surprise. "Me?"

"Yeah, I mean, I'm gonna try my best to do that too but this isn't some little monster or ghost we're going after. It's Lucifer. Which means... I might not be able to look out for my brother the way I want to. You... Well you're-"

"Essentially useless?" I interrupted.

"N-No, that's not what I meant," He groaned and rubbed his forehead. "I just mean that since... God, I don't even know what I meant, I just wanted to make sure that you and me were on the same page when it comes to this. I'm gonna be fighting right along side Dean, Ellen and Jo are too. And Cas well, who knows what he's gonna be doing. I want someone to watch my brothers back, and I just figured that besides me, you would be the one that would do that one hundred percent, right?"

I couldn't deny that. "Sam, I can promise you that nothing is going to happen to Dean. I would never let it, I swear."

He eyed me suspiciously after that but quickly shook it off. "Yeah, I know, Laney. We're all gonna be fine out there, we'll make it out."

Yes, they most definitely would. Because Castiel was going to make certain they didn't step one foot into that damned town.


End file.
